Paul Dergarabedian Watch: ‘The Simpsons’ Edition

Our favorite vacuous word machine Paul Dergarabedian was all over The Simpsons Movie and its huge $71.9 million weekend, telling the AP, “Homer’s odyssey paid off.� Yes, that is an actual thing he said to an actual reporter or simulacrum thereof. Overall, analysts seem stunned by The Simpsons Movie’s box-office take, which sort of surprises us; who are the fools who didn’t think this would be a big fat hit?

Meanwhile, Lindsay Lohan’s thriller I Know Who Killed Me opened at No. 9 with a dismal $3.4 million. Nikki Finke blames La Lohan’s offscreen drama, but that seems too easy (especially given the F CinemaScore that Finke reports for I Know… in that same paragraph); we think Lohan’s destroying her career through a combination of tabloid-baiting misbehavior and shockingly horrible professional choices. Remember, this is the same actress who managed to appear in such dissimilar yet awesome movies as Freaky Friday, Mean Girls, and A Prairie Home Companion in recent years, and now she’s starring in torture porn?

’Simpsons’ rakes in Plenty of ‘D’oh’ at Box Office [AP via CNN]
#1 ‘SIMPSONS’ D’OH! $167M Worldwide: Bigger Than Any Pixar Toon, Fox Boasts [Deadline Hollywood Daily]
Earlier: Paul Dergarabedian Must Be Stopped