Larry David Reaffirms Status As Miserable Person

“I defy anyone to produce any evidence that the word ‘happy’ has ever crossed my lips. I am not now, nor have I ever been, ‘happy.’� —Larry David on his unwavering malaise [NYP]

“Matt [Groening] confirmed it. It’s an honor, once you get over the shock of seeing yourself as a horrible, yellow caricature.� —Comedian Rich Hall, who was the inspiration for Moe the Bartender on The Simpsons [Neatorama]

“So far I have not pooped onstage, but many times I have felt like pooping onstage.� —Debbie Harry [Rolling Stone]

“She came up with the idea in 40-Year-Old Virgin where my character is drinking and driving, she said, ‘When the drunk lady is driving, she should fall asleep at the wheel … and then fart.’ So we did the falling asleep at the wheel, and then she watched it and she said, ‘Why didn’t you have her fart?’� —Leslie Mann on daughter Maude’s contributions to The 40-Year-Old Virgin [Coming Soon]

“I just thought it was a funny title because it seemed so patently false to me. I definitely have my flaws. Thank God none of them are physical — physically I’m perfect.� —Michael Ian Black on the title of his new album, I Am a Wonderful Man [Red and Black]
—Elizabeth Black