After having weird, possibly all-in-her-head relations with Mila Kunis in the upcoming Black Swan, Natalie Portman cannot be satiated! She will work her way into the beds of every That 70’s Show cast member in the greater Los Angeles area, and her next onscreen conquest is Ashton Kutcher, to judge from the trailer for No Strings Attached. Portman plays a tiny doctor who only wants to hang out with Kutcher in order to sleep with him (believable!), but their casual sexing hits a roadblock when he starts to develop real feelings for her. Careful, Kutcher, or she’ll move on to Topher Grace, Danny Masterson, and maybe even Debra Jo Rupp. (Also, this is weird: Kunis has her own pal-boinking comedy coming out with Justin Timberlake called Friends With Benefits, suggesting that Black Swan’s cracked-mirror funhouse lives on. Shadow her forever, Mila!)
