Everybody is a comedian on Twitter, but only a select few are truly worthy enough to have all of their witticisms transmitted to you, the ever busy comedy fan trying to navigate through an increasingly congested internet. Every Friday we’ll make your life a little bit easier by introducing you to an individual who consistently makes us laugh and momentarily forget that other days of the week exist.
(If you’re reading this from an RSS feed, jump on over to the website where you can actually view the tweets for an optimal level of enjoyment.)
Megan Neuringer (@MeganNeuringer) has appeared on Best Week Ever, Fringe, Delocated, and most recently in the movie Bachlorette. She’s written for Silent Library and freelances for Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.
But that doesn’t mean that you should ask her about her pan pizza.
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Nor should you ask her what today’s date is, because she has trouble with that. (This was written on September 10th.)
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And you definitely shouldn’t ask Megan to rake the leaves.
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Neuringer, like all of us, was misled by those friendly Olive Garden commercials.
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She is a champion.
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instagram made everyone a photographer the way twitter made everyone a comedian.
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Megan discovered the secret to eternal life.
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Andwhat the most useful app in the world would be.
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Megan has the ability to ruin a comfortable, brisk 65 degree day with just one sentence.
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To be honest tempeh tantrums don’t sound all that appealing either.
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Neuringer might need to reconsider her pillow talk.
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She loves the government. Sort of.
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And not all members of government exactly.
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Megan expects too much from tailors.
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Neuringer may tell you that she is a wallet inspector. That is a lie.
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You might be working overtime wrong.
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She’s kind of a bad deal.
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But not as bad as a cow who can’t even finish a joke.
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Roger Cormier needs a new tailor.