Entertainment Weekly just published a series of spoilers from Parks and Recreation’s showrunner Michael Schur, but with the names of the characters in said spoilers blanked out as an attempt at a “fun” guessing game, with a key at the bottom so you can decode the answers. Well, I have a firm anti-fun policy, so I’ve taken the liberty of cracking the code to Michael Schur’s spoilers for everyone who doesn’t want to waste their time on Entertainment Weekly’s silly games. Behold!:
1. “Ann has a personal breakthrough thanks to a cowboy hat, and some tough love from Leslie.”
2. “Champion the three-legged dog may be the only thing that can cheer up Chris when he has an emotional breakdown.”
3. “Will Ron actually win an award for something? And more importantly, will he care?”
4. “Halloween pranks aren’t always harmless, as Leslie and Ann will learn the hard way.”
5. “Ben finds himself contemplating a big career move on the deck of a yacht.”
6. “Why in the world would Leslie possibly try to destroy a project idea from April?”
7. “Episode 8 might just be the last we hear from Burt Macklin.”
8. “Ron grabs Jean-Ralphio’s wrist so hard, he’ll think twice about food tray etiquette in the future.”
9. “Can Donna read all of “50 Shades of Gray” in one afternoon?”
10. “Of all the people to have thrown a well-attended party, who’d have guessed it’d be Jerry?
11. “Was Tom texting when he got into a minor car accident? How dare you, sir! He was tweeting.”