brothers

The 2013 Hemsworth Power Rankings: Round 2

Photo: Maya Robinson and Photos by Getty

In late September, we began a long and fraught journey to determine, who, exactly, is the best Hemsworth brother. We will be checking in with Chris and Liam periodically over the course of 2013 in order to measure their progress as their respective blockbusters open this month. Today, on the eve of Thor: The Dark World, Vulture presents Round Two of our Hemsworth Power Rankings.

Category One: Actual Acting
Chris: Take it from New York’s David Edelstein and his review of Thor: The Dark World: “[Chris’s] voice is a thing of beauty — basso profundo with a rasp that adds an echo effect. He easily overpowers Hopkins, whose perorations are flat and cadences overfamiliar. Modern superheroes have an ironic, self-deprecating side, whereas Hemsworth is a true Marvel.†A Marvel!
Liam: Does grinning in front of paparazzi count as “acting� No? Okay, not a lot to remark on for Liam of late.
Advantage: Chris

Category Two: Market Value
Chris: Thor: The Dark World made $33 million internationally in its first week, and it is tracking at $75 million for its domestic opening this weekend. That is a lot of money!
Liam: Hunger Games: Catching Fire, which opens on November 22, is tracking at $140 to $150 million. That is more money.
Advantage: Chris, for now

Category Three: Tabloids
Chris: Still has a cute baby. Told some cute stories about his wedding.
Liam: You have to give him credit — instead of dumping Miley and running around town with a succession of reality-show stars or whatever, he hunkered down on the Mockingjay set and said as little as possible. (Granted, there is not a lot to do in Thomaston, Georgia. But still.) Meanwhile, Liam scored better than Chris in the Awareness, Twitter, and Tabloid portions of Vulture’s 2013 Most Valuable Stars. He’s had a rough patch, but there is potential here.
Advantage: Liam

Category Four: Shirts and Shirtlessness
Chris: Yes, there is a totally gratuitous shirtless scene in Thor 2. But now he is on a “starvation diet†for his role in Ron Howard’s Heart of the Sea. Hmm.
Liam: Still wearing those tank tops. And that Satisfaction clip is making the rounds again.
Advantage: Chris, for now

Category Five: Names
Chris: Has not gotten any rarer.
Liam: No new Hollywood Liams since we last checked.
Advantage: Liam

The final tally is a very close 3–2 in favor of Chris. Chris is currently the better Hemsworth, but watch this space. It is going to get tricky soon.

The 2013 Hemsworth Power Rankings: Round 2