I would pay good money for Frankie’s Now That’s What I Call Throat Singing album that’s playing when she visits Jacob on his farm to assess yams. They need something bulbous and hearty for the lube. All that talk about something bulbous and hearty prompts Jacob to invite Frankie to tagine night. And so begins Frankie insisting that it’s not a date, definitely not a date. (It’s a date.)
Back at the beach house, Grace is emptying out the closet of her Marge Simpson-esque Chanel suits while Frankie makes her a kale smoothie. Frankie asks if all the other fancy ladies got beamed up to the mothership and wishes the pantsuits a bon voyage. Frankie tells Grace that Jacob invited her to dinner and insists it’s a not a date. Grace bottom-lines the whole situation and tells her what’s up: It might be a weird hippie date, but it’s still a dang date.
Meanwhile, Robert is trying on his favorite old suit and modeling it for a bed-ridden Mallory. Do you think Brooklyn Decker got to do all her scenes in a single day while an intern read her lines off-camera? I think so. Anyway, Robert wants to fit back into his London trip suit. Mallory has a tailor who can work miracles. Robert thought that having a heart attack would help him lose weight … sure.
When Grace takes her collarless jackets to Change of A Dress — a name that is apparently a point of contention among the employees, particularly Carol — she sees that the store also has a job-placement and career-mentoring program. We can all see where this is going. Grace will insist that she needs something to do, again and again. Grace. We know. We have been paying attention to … well, all of the episodes of this show. After Grace gives thank-you-note advice to one of the lucky women (who looks darling in canary yellow), she signs up for the mentorship program.
Frankie is showing Brianna her box art and yes, that is a pun. I’m going to describe it to you and I want you all to close your eyes and picture it. It’s a vagina with Frankie as the clitoral hood and her hair as the lush thick pubic hair. You’re welcome for feeding both of your nightmares and your wet dreams. Because Frankie is also an intuitive witch, she can tell that Brianna and Barry are bouncing butts. Barry is ready to tell everyone in the office that he and Brianna are an item, but Brianna doesn’t want to spread the news. Before Barry can bail, Brianna bounds after him and blurts out about their … um … bromance? Aw, yeah, alliteration.
Grace meets Billie, the Ruby Rose stunt double whom Grace is going to mentee. Grace is not impressed. Also, what is Billie supposed to be? She’s got bamboo earrings a backwards fitted, but also a septum ring and a military vest. What archetype is she? Is this just how Netflix executives think millennials dress? Is she a millennial? Nevertheless, she wants to move up in the world from being a bartender to being a Diane (a boss-ass office manager). Grace sees her potential and we get an interview-skills montage. Grace puts Billie in a suit and sends her off to an interview with Brianna.
Frankie sits down to eat dinner with Jacob and eleventy-twelve different veggie dishes. (I’m gonna need the recipe for that cornbread.) Frankie can’t help but ramble on about yam supplies and maintaining a relationship with the organic community. Jacob lovingly brushes a strand of hair out of her face. I swooned. Jacob just lays it out on the table like his veggie tagine and asks, “What we are we doing?†If you have to ask, you won’t get the answer you want. Jacob knows it’s a date. It’s not a business dinner. He’s wearing a sport coat. Frankie is just plain scared. She likes him and doesn’t say “but†… but Jacob feels it. Bless your sensitive little heart, Jacob. Frankie goes to lunch the next day with Amanda and Jason because she’s not ready for romance, but needs to talk about it. What exists between colleagues with chemistry and full-blown romance? My thought was “friends with benefits.†Amanda and Jason say, “Sex.†We’re not wrong.
Frankie tries to talk to about Grace about her feelings. That’s a big mistake because Grace has shockingly become an optimist and tells Frankie to go for it. Frankie is scared of that big slip-and-slide into love. It’s time to take the plunge, Frankie.
Robert Skypes with Mallory, who is teaching him Ina Garten’s chicken-and-mashed-potatoes recipe. Robert slips in a whole stick of butter while Mallory can’t see. Jeffrey Garten would approve. Robert has been making grand plans all episode.
Unfortunately, Billie never showed up to her interview with Brianna, so Grace goes on the warpath and stalks her at the bar where she works. Grace comes in scolding Billie for her inconsiderate behavior and demands a dry, dry, dry martini. Billie doesn’t listen and makes Grace the best martini she’s ever had. Billie put that stank on it. Billie tells Grace to go find a job. This show is finally doing something, rather than telling us it needs to do something.
Jacob shows up at the beach house to drop off some seed catalogs. When Frankie told him she can see them picking pumpkins or apples in the fall, I swooned. While Frankie is word-vomiting, she somehow gathers up the courage and kisses Jacob! Frankie is ready for something fun, but they’ve got to go slow. I’m here for it.
Sol comes home from work to see Robert in a franken-London suit. It’s the suit from the first time they ever said “I love you†to each other. Robert has made a big dinner for Shabbat because they’re both home, safe and sound. The health scare is over. Their traditions and lives can finally become one. Every Friday will be their time together. Sol decides this is the ideal time to tell Robert that he slept with Frankie. It was a mistake. It was an emotional impulse. He didn’t tell Robert because he doesn’t want to make things worse.
Robert sits silently until Sol begs him to speak.
“Get out.â€
OH SHIIIIIIIT.