You’re the Worst Recap: Everyone Goes Away Eventually

Gretchen and Jimmy had sex because of course Gretchen and Jimmy had sex. They did it because they obviously and definitely and seriously should not have done it. These two dumb-dumbs fling themselves in the direction of the worst decision possible, like, 97 percent of the time.

That last 3 percent, though, is what Gretchen does afterward. When she wakes up alone and thinks Jimmy abandoned her, it’s a totally plausible fear on her part, even though he just ran out for coffee and will be back in a minute. For the love of sibling-incest erotica, JUST LEAVE THE GIRL A NOTE. You’re in a hotel, Jimmy! They give you a notepad! Also, text her! If you have a track record of bailing on this woman, maybe go a modicum out of your way to show that you are not, in fact, bailing on her at this juncture.

I really liked their fight here. It reminded me of their confrontation at the beginning of this season, which feels like many forevers and picked-up-yet-quickly-abandoned stretches of character development ago. Gretchen reiterates something she has been wallowing in all season: her belief that no one ever fights for her. Jimmy whines that he already did all the stuff he was supposed to do (uh, really?) and Gretchen isn’t allowed to be mad at him anymore (umm), but she is done. “Deep down, I think you like being alone more, anyway,” she yells, and she is right. She sprints back for the breakfast carbs he bought her before running away. Yes Gretch! You get those carbs. You’re going to need your energy to deal with your infuriating, moronic best friend.

Lindsay, who started this season in a very promising place — with a job at which she excelled, a sense of purpose and self salvaged from the wreckage of her trash marriage, and a sweet, burgeoning relationship with Edgar — is not connected at all to that version of herself anymore. Now she is driven completely by her rage at a character we did not even know about until two episodes ago. First, she wanted Gretchen to get over Jimmy (and off her couch), but as soon as Gretchen did that, Lindsay lashed out at her for being “boring” and monogamous with Boone. Now, Lindsay is pissed that Gretchen is in this relationship with Boone because she is suddenly very invested in the mental and emotional health of Boone’s daughter, Olivia.

I do love that when Gretchen said she’s putting herself first for once, Lindsay replied, “… for once?” When you’re right, you’re right. Like when you say Stephen Hawking cares about the universe.

Did you guys watch Westworld? I quit after two episodes (don’t @ me) but the one part I remember is that all the robo-wenches and cowboys and whatnot get rebooted every day, so they never remember anything and start their characters almost entirely from scratch. That is how I feel about You’re the Worst this season. Lindsay isn’t the only culprit here. Didn’t Gretchen just behave in a terrifically inappropriate and rage-y manner around Olivia? How much time has passed between these episodes? How is Gretchen already super comfortable around Olivia, texting bitmoji and teaching her the tricks you need to win at Wheel of Fortune? These characters are so inconsistent that none of their relationships make sense.

We also get another couple entries into “Okay, but how stupid can Lindsay be and still be a functioning human being on the planet,” the worst of the bunch being that she refers to a bag of tomatoes as “limes.”

Lindsay crashes taco night, where Gretchen, Boone, and Olivia are all getting along adorably and appropriately (okay!) because she thinks it’s important to sabotage this seemingly healthy relationship now that she’s sad about how her favorite of her mom’s boyfriends didn’t stick around. To this end, she hides in Boone’s trash can (“Shhh, I’m a grouch”) to spring out and tell Boone that Gretchen isn’t over Jimmy. Fortunately, for now, she does not tell him that Lindsay slept with Jimmy, a potentially friendship-ending betrayal.

Boone reacts to this threat first by explaining to Lindsay, in the slow, patient voice that is required, that, “I am an adult and you are a girl in a trash can.” Then he asks Gretchen to move in with him. She is so happy and it makes me nervous, as happiness for any of these kids always does. She slips out in the middle of the night to light Jimmy’s car on fire, tossing in her vibrator and a bunch of Christmas lights for good measure.

Meanwhile, Jimmy got a deal to write more Width of a Peach books — a quadrilogy! — and he’s decided it’s time to leave L.A. … again … even though we just did a whole thing where he ran away from this city, realized he couldn’t run away from his own personality, and came back. I did like the line, “I came back to town to face the music, but it didn’t want to face me,” though. That is lovely.

Edgar’s story is depressing, mostly isolates him from the rest of the cast, and doesn’t really seem to be going anywhere. His sartorial transformation to douche bro is complete, but his buddy has abandoned him. Edgar decides the best way to deal with this is to go to his boss’s house late one weeknight and yell about it. What? What even is this? Is this whole riff only funny to people who work in L.A. comedy scenes? All I can say for him is he reacts quite calmly to the prospect of Jimmy hightailing it out of town again: “Everyone goes away eventually.”

The true hero of this episode is the woman whom Jimmy tries (and fails) to mess with while she’s on her run. She just gets up in his face, yells at him for being a lazy prick, and scares him into running away. Plus 1,000 points for knocking his beer out of his hand.

The worst: Lindsay.

Runners-up: Gretchen stealing Olivia’s desserts from her lunchbox, Edgar’s “friend” Max, Dutch Oven, and their boss Doug (was that girl on the pool float alive? Like, how sure are we that she was alive?).

A few good things: The return of Killian (though his life has really taken a turn), the woman who yells at Jimmy, and Olivia.