Vulture dot com is no stranger to diving into important reality-TV investigations. And now, since the long-awaited, three-part Real Housewives of Salt Lake City season-two reunion began Sunday, February 27, it’s time for another. Captain Andy Cohen kicked off the icy gathering with a number of intros, featuring a thrilled “Hi Baby Gorgeous†— signaling the iconic, no longer micless Lisa Barlow, who has in the span of 20 episodes managed to: say her (ex?) BFF Meredith Marks allegedly “fucked half of New York,†get in a bus fight with Jen Shah, allegedly pull out of a Vida Tequila–catered event that Whitney Rose got involved in re: her cousin Angie (who is most likely just a fictional character being played by Sarah Paulson), and allegedly call Heather Gay a “Lego figure.†But what might be the most shocking assertion to trickle out of Barlow’s dramatic arc this season is Gay, her castmate and second-half of “Bad Weather,†claiming that Barlow likes to “front pictures†on yachts.
“It’s the life you pretend to have,†Gay stated. “I pay for my stuff,†Barlow countered, adding, “Are you insulting John Barlow?†“You know, I have dirt on you Lisa, and I hold it all back, but I won’t hold it back any longer if you wanna go there,†Gay threatened.†Barlow called Gay a “liar†and this specific accusation “so insane.†But wait, there’s more! Gay kept it going by saying “We know you, we love you†to Barlow and “We want you to have all of that for yourself!†Barlow flipped her bangs and responded: “Do you want my K-1’s?†They argued until Gay got the last word in before commercial. “I don’t want to be friends with a caricature of some teen magazine she read in eighth grade that said ‘How to Be a Cool Mean Girl,’†she burned her. As the reunion continues this Sunday, March 6, with part two, we have to ask: Do Lisa and RHONY’s Sonja Morgan share the same boat?