Photo: Sachyn Mital/Lincoln Center
Las Culturistas, a culture podcast hosted by comedians Bowen Yang and Matt Rogers, returned to Lincoln Center for their annual Las Culturistas Culture Awards in New York City. Last year’s show featured celebrity guests (hey, Taylor Swift made a virtual appearance last year), sing-alongs, commitments to the bit, and references to Bravo shows. Saturday night’s show promised to highlight every high and low point in pop culture in the past year, Scandoval included. With over one hundred categories and “a glittering assemblage of young comedians and celebrity award presenters,†there probably needs to be an awards show for this awards show. The show took place on June 17, with Vulture sharing the culture via Instagram from the event.
Meanwhile, here’s the list of every single nomination with select winners — formal update coming soon. Bon appétit!
Biggest Jester
- Kyrsten Sinema
- New York Times’ anti-trans lookin’ ass
- Joker on the Joker Card - Deck of cards
- Lady Gaga as Harley Quinn
Biggest Flop
- Four Nights In Orlando: Truth Tellers
- Tanya McQuoid - The White Lotus
- Ginni Thomas; and while we’re at it? Clarence too!
- Waterworld starring Kevin Costner
Biggest Jester Flop
- Tom Sandoval
- Tom Schwartz
- Lydia Tár
- George Santos
- Kitara Ravache
Biggest Jester Flop in the Clown Square
- Elon Musk - Twitter
- The Green Eyed Bandits - The Real Housewives of Potomac and at large
- The studios who will not give the WGA a fair deal
- Raquel Leviss
- Tucker Carlson
Free Them! Award for Criminal Who Should Be Free
- The girls locked up at the end of the Pirates of the Caribbean ride
- Elizabeth “Liz†Holmes
- Han Solo
Biggest Night of Our Lives
- Tonight at the Las Culturista Culture Awards!
- The Oscars
- When a Fag Sees Adele, Las Vegas
- Youth group lock-in
- Date night with the love of my life, Michael. Love you, baby.
Finalist of the Year
- D’Arcy Carden
- Chappell Roan
- Betty Gilpin
- Melanie Lynskey
- Olympians
Melanie Lynskey Award for Most Sweetest Person
- Sammi Sweetheart - MTV’s Jersey Shore
- Toad - Nintendo
- Can’t remember her name but the girl from the other night
- Drew Barrymore
Free Willy Award for Animal Achievement
- Jenny the Donkey
- Mickey Mouse
- Tortoises, all
- The cast of The Secret Life of Pets
Best Skill to Have
- Drew Barrymore Impression
- Remembers names
- Changing a tire
- Fierce runway walk
- A sense of play
The Denise Richards Drop Dead Gorgeous Line Reading Award
- “She’s skinny, Amber, not deaf!†- Denise Richards
- “Lights, camera and me without a stitch of makeup on!†- Denise Richards
- “Can’t take my EYES off of YOU.†- Denise Richards
- “You had me at hello†- Renée Zellweger
Diva Down Award (Person Who Fell Hard Award)
- Jason Derulo
- Grape Stomp Woman
- Tanya McQuoid - The White Lotus
- Nazi Mama from Indiana Jones
Best Religion
- Mormon 2.0
- “The school of lifeâ€
- Long-form improv comedy
- Whatever gives people meaning
Best Religious Practice
- Kneeling
- Anything with water
- Prayer
- Zip-zap-zop
- Breath
Most Amazing Impact in Film
- PAs
- B-Camera Grip
- Margot Robbie
- Diane Warren
- M3GAN
They Should be an Actor Award for Not Actor But Should
- Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
- Sunny Hostin
- Dr. Nicole Martin - The Real Housewives of Miami
- All children not already acting
- Malala
Allison Williams Cool Girl Award
- Ariana Madix
- Ariana Grande
- Daisy Duck
- Elizabeth Olsen
- Zendaya
Hunger Games Award for Best Huge Franchise
- The Fast and the Furious
- Avatar
- Mario
- Oreo Cookies
- McDonalds
Best Holiday - Fixed Date
- Christmas Eve
- Christmas Day
- 4/20
- Leap Year Baby Birthday
- September 4th… B’Day
Best Holiday - Changing Date
- Memorial Day
- Thanksgiving
- Passover
- Pizza night
- Personal day
Santa Award for Being Unforgettable
- Sasha Velour
- Sasha Colby
- Sasha Obama
- Malia Obama
- “Breathe†by Faith Hill
Mother Award
- Kelly Clarkson
- Cirie Fields
- Moms all across the world
- Ava Max
- Keke Palmer
- Padma Lakshmi - Top Chef
- Jennifer Lopez - The Mother
- Jennifer Lawrence - mother!
- Idina Menzel
- Regina Hall
Slouching Towards Bethlehem Award for Chicest Book to Hold
- The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian by C. S. Lewis
- Stories I Only Tell My Friends: An Autobiography by Rob Lowe
- Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find, and Keep Love by Doctors
- Open Book by Jessica Simpson
- Game of Thrones
M3GAN Award for Servin K-U-N-T
- Backup dancers - Rihanna Super Bowl
- EMTs
- BLACKPINK
- Lara Croft: Tomb Raider
- The WGA
Biggest Cultural Threat to Us
- Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande - Wicked
- StraightioLab Podcast
- The fickle nature of NYC weather in June
- Governors across America
- Overselves, tbh
Best Gay Guy - Normal
- A teacher (TIE)
- A nurse (TIE)
- A fireman (!!!)
- “Just moved to the city.â€
Best Gay Guy - Famous
- Andy Cohen
- Anderson Cooper
- Abraham Lincoln
- Bowen Yang
Best Gay Guy - Somewhere in Between
- Jimmy Fowlie
- Pat Regan
- Governor Jared Polis
- Matt Rogers
Diplo Award for LGBTQ
- Hayley Kiyoko
- Papi Juice
- Jessie Ware
- Josh Sharp & Aaron Jackson
- RuPaul’s Drag Race: All Stars
Baby We’re Looking Forward to Seeing Older
- Lil Nas X
- Apple and Moses Martin
- Your niece
Shiv Roy Award for Best Fake Accent
- Melanie Lynskey, all
- Toni Collette - The Sixth Sense
- James McAvoy every now and then
- Toni Collette - Hereditary
Bridget Jones Award for Best Fake British Accent
- Gillian Anderson - The Crown
- Emma Stone - The Favourite
- Gillian Anderson - Sex Education
- Alan Tudyk, all
- Everyone doing their slay Love Island impressions a.k.a. when you all say “propa chatâ€
Scariest Moment in History
- Hereditary lil’ diva head come off
- The Big Bang
- Jumpscare when you see mama you knew in COLLEGE on the street what?!
- Cuban Missile Crisis
- Saying “I love you†to the one and you know you can never go back… This will change things…
Education Award for Best School Subject
- Yearbook
- AP US History
- Pre-Calc depending on teacher
- Drop Everything and Read
- Certainly not phys ed, speaking as queer people!
Titanic Award for Monoculture
- Scandoval
- When THAT CHEETO was arraigned!
- Barbie
- Titanic
- Don’t Worry Darling press tour
Best Way to Travel
- Caravan
- Sprinter van
- Not in a huge rush
- Pride float
- Often!!!!!!!!!
Best Type of House
- High ranch
- Mansion
- Apartment with deck
- Lake
- Anything by CeCe Peniston
“Amber†Award for Best 90s Name
- Chelsea
- Courtney
- Mary-Kate
- Ashley
Most Fascinating Language
- Na’vi
- Romance
- American
- Acts of service
- “Body language! HA!†- Ursula, The Little Mermaid
RosalÃa Award for Best Outdoor Live Performance
- Diana Ross, rain
- Shakespeare in the Park
- These crust punks pretending they don’t have daddy money!
- Whitney Houston - “Star Spangled Banner,†Super Bowl
- RosalÃa - Coachella
Kimberly Akimbo Award for Best Indoor Performance
- Titanique
- Parade
- Beyoncé - “Ring the Alarm,†2006 Video Music Awards
- Kate Berlant - Kate
- Lady Gaga on any awards show doing “Jo Calderoneâ€
People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive
- Ricky Martin
- George Clooney
- Matt Damon
- Idris Elba
- Dad from Inside Out
Ariana Madix Award for Girl, You Can Do Betta Hon
- Shereé Whitfield - The Real Housewives of Atlanta
- Florence Pugh - Don’t Worry Darling
- Ariana Madix - Vanderpump Rules
Best Airline
- It doesn’t matter as long as we’re at LAGUARDIA!
- Alaska
Best Thing to Drink on a Flight
- Honey, if I took off from LAGUARDIA, doesn’t matter! I’m already happy!
- Ginger ale
MUNA Award for Hottest Queer
- Katie - MUNA
- Naomi - MUNA
- Jo - MUNA
- Fans of MUNA
- Matt Bomer
Angelina Jolie Humanitarian Prize
- Doja Cat
- The Homeless Not Toothless organization
- Whoever designed the new LaGuardia
Most Dominant Predator
- Cheetah
- Tiger
- Lion
- Shark
Most Vulnerable Prey
- Shrimp
- Kelp
- Fish
- Pisces humans
Margo Martindale Character Actress of the Year
- Dale Dickey
- Elizabeth Marvel
- Robin Weigert
- Norma Dumezweni
- Hong Chau
Most Likely to Succeed
- Stephanie Hsu
- Janelle Monae
- Doja Cat
Water Award for Necessary Thing
- Sunscreen
- “Just something to hold me over.â€
- Sunlight
- A VPN
- Doja Cat
The Greatest Showman
- Hugh Jackman
- Vanessa Hudgens
- Doja Cat
- Chrishell Stause - Real estate
- Jinkx Monsoon
Largest Number
- 99
- A zillion
- “Anything!!!!†said like a mother in distress
- “You Can’t Stop the Beat†- Hairspray finale
Public Feud We Want to Start Right Now, Tonight
- The StraightioLab Podcast
- Will Ferrell
- Pepsi-Cola
- Jordin Sparks
- The Kremlin
Starbucks Award for Chillest Coffee Order
- Grande Iced Black
- Ummmmm just an iced green tea
- Americano with almond. Oh okay then with oat
- I’ll actually do the blueberry kombucha
- I’ll have a large iced caramel macchiato
Ice Award for Best Frozen
- Piña Colada
- Frozen 2 - “Into the Unknown†scene
- Circular ice balls for a whiskey drink
- Jack Nicholson - The Shining
- Coke Slurpee
Shot We Are Shooting in This Moment
- Kelly Clarkson come on Las Culturistas
- Pedro Pascal check your DMs
- Matt and Bowen in Book of Mormon the movie
- If anyone is on the Faerie server in Final Fantasy XIV, Bowen would love to do dungeon runs with you!
- Any cute nice guy, friends or more
Best Length for Movie
- 86 minutes
- 119 minutes
- While the bolognese is cooking
Best Length for TV Episode
- 58 minutes
- 24 minutes
- Quibi
Meal We Should Have Gotten But Didn’t
- Chicken française
- The burger
- Buffalo blasts - The Cheesecake Factory
- A Michelle Pfieffer Catwoman spinoff movie
- Big spicy crab soup
Normani Award for What’s the Holdup?
- Fourth Austin Powers movie
- The Renaissance visuals like honestly
- New RHONY
- When you ordered your big spicy crab soup 40 minutes ago
Moulin Rouge Award for Most Exciting Spectacle
- Fireworks
- Moulin Rouge on Broadway
- Adele in Las Vegas
- Guardians of the Galaxy: Cosmic Rewind at Epcot
- Sasha Colby vs. Anetra - Any lipsync
Best Word to Whisper
- “heyâ€
- “seriously?â€
- “liposuctionâ€
- “fartedâ€
Best Word to Scream
- “GO!!!!!â€
- “DIVA!!!!!â€
- “NEVER!!!!â€
- “OH!!!!!!â€
Peacock Presents: The Award for Best Streaming Service
- Due to the ongoing WGA strike, we do not feel this category is appropriate at this time. We proudly stand with our Guild and will give this Peacock at a later date.
Betty Gilpin Award for Big Slay Again?!
- Big Thunder Mountain
- Betty Gilpin - Mrs. Davis
- The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom
- Michele Yeoh, all
- Anetra - lyp syncing
Eras Award for Best Era
- Speak Now
- Mesozoic
- Chunky Gold Necklace
- Bleach blonde
- reputation
iHeartRadio Best Podcast of the Year
- Las Culturistas
- StraightioLab
- The Daily
Social Change Moment of the Year
- Oprah - “Were you silent, or were you silenced?â€
- 2022 Las Culturistas Culture Awards
- Homeless Not Toothless Charity
Most Uncommon Accident
- Trips on a snake, hits head on boulder
- Hilary Swank - Million Dollar Baby
- Weed in the carry on, oh no, how did that get there
- Any of the shit you might see on Looney Tunes, which is fake
- When you text me shit about me you meant to send to her, you jerk
Kindest Greeting
- “Hi, my love.â€
- “Ciao.â€
- “Bonjour, boo.â€
- “Diva!!!!!!!!â€
- “We have been waiting for you…â€
Most Attractive Body Part
- Butt
- Face
- Eyes
- Foot
- Nape
Most Shocking Moment of the Year
- LaGuardia is a slay????
- Adriana DeMoura losing her foot - Real Housewives of Miami
- Logan Roy dying and the ensuing aftermath
Best Fish
- Minnow
- Koi
- Gold
Best Planet
- Naboo
- Pandora
- Planet Her by Doja Cat
Best News We Heard
- The Lyft XL is here to take all of your friends to the big party
- Annaleigh Ashford nailed the comedy
- Meghann Fahy is on her way to the studio to record Las Culturistas
- Bowen Yang cast as “Pfannee†in Wicked (both)
- There’s a big sale at our favorite store
Most Iconic Building or Structure
- Space Mountain
- LaGuardia Airport now
- Stonehenge
- Vanderpump at Caesars Palace
- Vanderpump à Paris
Album of the Year
- Renaissance - Beyoncé
- Midnights -Taylor Swift
- Prism - Katy Perry
- Into The Woods 2022 Original Broadway Revival Cast Album
- Chappell Roan’s when it comes out
Record of the Year
- “Padam Padam†- Kylie Minogue
- “All I Want for Christmas Is You†- Mariah Carey
- “8th World Wonder†- Kimberely Locke
- “If You Asked Me To†- Céline Dion
- “Breathe†by Faith Hill
Outstanding Reality Competition Host
- RuPaul - RuPaul’s Drag Race
- Alex Wagner - The Mole
- Padma Lakshmi - Top Chef: World All Stars
- Michelle Buteau - The Circle
- Alan Cumming - The Traitors
Most Memorable Line in a Movie or Film
- “I’m Peach.†- Anya Taylor-Joy, Super Mario Bros. Movie
- “Are you ready?†- Anya Taylor-Joy, Super Mario Bros. Movie
- “I will protect us!†- Anya Taylor-Joy, Super Mario Bros. Movie
- “I will lead us!†- Anya Taylor-Joy, Super Mario Bros. Movie
- “How is your baby?†- Kate Winslet underwater, Avatar: The Way of Water
Christina Aguilera Award for “It’s Just Goodâ€
- Oreo cookies
- Succession
- Pancakes
- Aquariums
- Sara Bareilles
Best Dressed
- Anne Hathaway
- Jessica Chastain
- Zendaya
- Flo Pugh
- Mickey Rourke
Most Memorable Line in a TV Show
- “Tutti gay!†- Old man on yacht, The White Lotus
- “I, like, wipe my butt with that!†Alexia Nepola, Real Housewives of Miami
- “She’s brought a ludicrously capacious handbag,†-Matthew Macfayden
- “Cook MY meat!†-Ego Nwodim, Saturday Night Live
- Ugh, fine: “Please! These gays, they’re trying to murder me!†-Jennifer Coolidge, The White Lotus
- “DEATH! To all of them!†- Wendy Williams
Cate Blanchett Award for Good Acting
- Sarah Snook - Succession
- Meghann Fahy - The White Lotus
- Cate Blanchett - Tár
- James Marsden - Jury Duty
- Edy Modica - Jury Duty
- Rashida “Sheedz†Olayiwola - Jury Duty
- Stephanie Hsu - Everything Everywhere All At Once
Tina Turner Legend Award
- Scheana Shay
- Kenya Moore
- LaGuardia Airport
- Judge Judy
- Kate Hudson
Best Movie We Did Not See
- Mary Queen of Scots
- Hillbilly Elegy
- Guardians of the Galaxy: Vol 2
- Guardians of the Galaxy: Vol 2
- Babylon
Best Dinner
- Beef Lasagna
- Pizza Night
- Breakfast
Best Lunch
- Tuna melt
- Tuna salad
- Spicy tuna roll
Best Breakfast
- Croissant
- Smoothie
- Starbucks egg bites
Best Snack
- Pretzel sticks
- Oreo cookies
- How about some humble pie?
Best Beverage
- Dr. Pepper
- Ginger ale
- Liquid courage
- Tap
- Sparkling
Joy Behar Award for Stand Up Comedy
- Naomi Ekperigin (TIE)
- Natalie Rotter-Laitman (TIE)
- Charlie Bardey (TIE)
- Jo Firestone (TIE)
- Joel Kim Booster (TIE)
- Pat Regan (TIE)
- Roseanne Barr
Best Song on Hamilton Soundtrack
- “Satisfiedâ€
- “The Schuyler Sistersâ€
- “Helplessâ€
- “Cabinet Battle #1â€
- “Burnâ€
- “The Room Where It Happensâ€
- “Dear Theodosiaâ€
- “Cabinet Battle #2â€
- “It’s Quiet Uptown†(Kelly Clarkson cover)
- “It’s Quiet Uptown†(Renee Elise Goldsberry original song)
- “Say no to thisâ€
WandaVision Award for Television
- The Real Housewives of Miami
- Lucia and Mia - The White Lotus
- Carolyn Wiger - Survivor, season 44
- Edy Modica - Have You Heard of Christmas?
- Bowen Yang - Dropping fork in Lisa from Temecula
Chris Award for Most Timeless Name
- John
- Jess
- George
- Mark
- Doja
Artist of the Millennium
- Vin Diesel
- Shakira
- Sarah McLachlan
- Jeff Probst
- Cher
Victoria Beckham Award for Outstanding Achievement
- Oreo Cookies, Food and Beverage
- Jojo, singing
- Sarah Snook, Acting
- Pam Anderson, general excellence
- Roger Deakins, cinematography
Tom and Rita Couple Award
- The Obamas
- The Carters
- Zoe Kazan and Paul Dano
- The couples of Modern Family