The Brian Jordan Alvarez Extended Universe

From an Australian weight lifter getting a Ph.D. in biceps to a spiritual leader with the ability to harness and wield purse source energy, catching up on all of Brian Jordan Alvarez’s TikTok characters in one afternoon is a great way to induce psychosis. And yet, it’s necessary work if you have any hope of untangling the web of dramatic and sometimes overlapping stories in the BJA extended universe.

Most recently, Alvarez’s character TJ Mack went viral for his song “Sitting,� landing him — as in Alvarez, but also sometimes TJ — a number of interviews and a remix on Spotify. Mack’s goofy facial expressions and equally ridiculous voice has made him a fan-favorite, but every BJA character has the same three hallmarks: A video filter and/or a wig, a near-indistinguishable accent, and deeply complex interpersonal dynamics that we’re dropped in the middle of. In the years since Alvarez began posting in 2020, he’s also introduced characters who are connected to others, like TJ Mack and his wife, and Rick and his personal trainer, Vardy.

The total number of BJA TikTok characters spans well beyond this list, with some popping up for just a video or two, and others who had their own arc, but have not made much of an appearance in the past year. It’s for that reason we’ve narrowed it down to just the heavy hitters, including Alvarez’s first and longest-running TikTok character, Marnie T, with shoutouts to important side characters, like Your Rich Southern Aunt’s husband, Dale. At the end of it all, you’ll have a firmer understanding next time, say, Timothy’s bald head pops up on your screen, but will be no closer to knowing how Alvarez managed to come up with it all.

TJ Mack

Proud husband and father with a large mouth and eyes and a love of big-box stores. 

First TikTok appearance: November 30, 2021. It’s a weird, early version that’s a mere hint of what it would grow to be — like the unaired Gilmore Girls pilot.
Relationship status: Married
Occupation: When we met him, he subsisted on an allowance provided by his wife. Recently, he’s found success as a singer with his song “Sitting,� which comes after lesser-known hits like “Jogging� and “Laundry.�
Distinct vocal mannerism: Replaces most other consonants with b or d or mn while alternating between plural and singular nouns for no reason.
Most recent scandal: Whatever he did to prompt this video from his wife. Maybe he wore her wig again.
Does the character randomly get a far-off look in their eyes and pause mid-sentence? Yes. Aside from his love of Ross and TJ Maxx, this is what TJ Mack is best known for.

TJ Mack’s Wife

HBIC with Grinch-like eyebrows and a stern gaze who keeps Mack on a (necessary) short leash. 

First TikTok appearance: March 28, 2022. There are two sides to every story, and TJ Mack’s wife often shows up to fact-check her husband’s most recent anecdote, and to yell at us for believing it.
Relationship status: Married, and the mother of TJ’s son.
Occupation: Selling makeup for a company — TJ isn’t sure which one.
Distinct vocal mannerism: Yzma from The Emperor’s New Groove, but if she had peanut butter in her mouth.
Latest scandal: When we erroneously thought TJ’s success would never be enough for her.
Does the character randomly get a far-off look in their eyes and pause mid-sentence? No, all her pauses are deliberate and powerful.

Timothy

A young bald gay man with a large mouth, and admirable zest for life, and a deeply concerning lack of street smarts.

First TikTok appearance: October 14, 2022, when he had landed in L.A. with nothing but a one-month Airbnb rental and a dream.
Relationship status: Sort of engaged to 56-year-old Dan — as in, Dan asked Timothy to make him the beneficiary of his life-insurance policy and Timothy said yes! <3
Occupation: “Moving product� as CEO and CFO of Dan’s company. Don’t ask what Dan does, he’s already told you, it’s the railroad-track business — and future mayor of West Hollywood!
Distinct vocal mannerism: Unbridled glee.
Latest scandal: When Dan wouldn’t stop putting him into luxury automobiles five or six times a day and sending him to meetings with strangers whose names he’s not allowed to know.
Does the character randomly get a far-off look in their eyes and pause mid-sentence? No, Timothy has unfortunately never experienced a moment of doubt in his life.

Rich Southern Aunt

A confident Southern woman navigating the many hardships of extreme wealth in the best-laid blonde wig you’ve ever seen.

First TikTok appearance: February 2, 2021, welcoming us to her little farm (because her husband, Dale, is only making $300,000 a year now :/).
Relationship status: Married to Dale, who we’ve met once.
Occupation: Filing recreational lawsuits against friends and small businesses.
Distinct vocal mannerism: Southern drawl.
Latest scandal: When she couldn’t decide between the St. Regis or the Four Seasons hotels.
Does the character randomly get a far-off look in their eyes and pause mid-sentence? Yes, when she’s trying to remember any given one of their houses.

The Studempt

A young, optimistic grad student with a love of singing, an artificially-chiseled jaw, and absolutely zero hardships. 

First TikTok appearance: May 2, 2023, on his way to class.
Relationship status: He just got a girlfriend!
Occupation: College student getting his master’s in research and science, as well as working an internship overseas doing research, science, and mathematics.
Distinct vocal mannerism: A valley-girl-meets-European accent, but the end of every word is chopped off and replaced with t.
Latest scandal: He never has any problems.
Does the character randomly get a far-off look in their eyes and pause mid-sentence? He somehow always has a far-off look in his eyes.

The Chef

An ambitious and short-tempered culinary savant with a round chin and, I can only imagine, the highest blood pressure known to man. 

First TikTok appearance: January 22, 2022, when he opened his first restaurant.
Relationship status: Married to his work.
Occupation: Chef
Distinct vocal mannerism: Angry Spaniard.
Latest scandal: The scandal is perpetual: No matter where he opens a restaurant, they never have the right kind of onion.
Does the character randomly get a far-off look in their eyes and pause mid-sentence? No, he is always yelling.

The Alien

A green-headed alien who acts as a liaison between those of us who have been cryogenically frozen and thawed on another planet, and our alien overlords who have enslaved us to manufacture Zincon corn equipment product and advertisements for the idea of health. 

First TikTok appearance: May 9, 2022, meeting and greeting us via, I believe, Zoom.
Relationship status: None — there’s no social mobility on this planet.
Occupation: Alien HR rep
Distinct vocal mannerism: Curt cheerfulness.
Latest scandal: None — we’ve been given two hours of rest and a seven minute food powder party. To expect more is ungrateful.
Does the character randomly get a far-off look in their eyes and pause mid-sentence? No, they’ve been sent down from higher-ups with a script.

Marnie T

A small-faced woman with a high-pitched voice and striking bob who definitely posts on Instagram about perineum sunning.

First TikTok appearance: April 25, 2020, on a really powerful day.
Relationship status: Connected, as we all are, to everyone via source energy.
Occupation: Spiritual leader with a masters in clinical spirituality from Georgetown — sign up for her class!
Distinct vocal mannerism: High pitched but on a powerful vibration.
Latest scandal: There’s no such thing as scandals — only signs from the universe.
Does the character randomly get a far-off look in their eyes and pause mid-sentence? Yes, almost exclusively.

Rick

A small-headed, large-chested Australian weightlifter now living in Minnesota so you can’t get mad at him for sometimes confusing pounds and kilos. It’s Rick!

First appearance: May 6, 2021, when he finally began lifting more than 100 pounds per rep.
Relationship status: Single, ladies!
Occupation: Weightlifter getting his Ph.D. in biceps.
Distinct vocal mannerism: Australian
Latest scandal: When people thought he hadn’t been lifting heaps lately.
Does the character randomly get a far-off look in their eyes and pause mid-sentence? Yes, sometimes, when he’s overpowered by his passion for lifting.

Vardy

A small-headed, large-chested Australian trainer in a wig. It’s Vardy!

First appearance: May 7, 2021, in response to Rick.
Relationship status: Single, but Rick is his other half.
Occupation: Rick’s personal trainer, who sometimes also comes to Rick’s house to wake him up and/or toss him in the ocean.
Distinct vocal mannerism: Australian (louder).
Latest scandal: When people didn’t realize that lifting is a lifestyle.
Does the character randomly get a far-off look in their eyes and take a luxurious pause mid-sentence? No. No days off.