Turns out Mr. Punchable Face also has vulnerable toes. Look, Colin Jost has a good life: He is married to Scarlett Johansson, he is grand poobah at Saturday Night Live and hosts “Weekend Update,†and he is currently in Tahiti acting as NBC’s surfing correspondent for the 2024 Olympics. Yes, the job that 8 billion of the rest of us want, Jost has, all because he is so qualified to be there on SNL. Within days of being in Tahiti, however, he hurt his toesies. Owie! “This might ruin my WikiFeet score but I just arrived in Tahiti for the surfing Olympics and the reef was excited to greet me,†he said on Instagram, posting a picture of his bloody feet. Coral reefs are endangered, but the ones still here hate Jost. In the future, NBC, maybe keep Jost behind the “Update†desk. Not because he’s funny but because he’s in danger if he tries to walk.
(Note: If he dies because of his staph-infected foot, we’ll all feel bad about this, including you reading this story, as you are now implicated.)