overnights

Curb Your Enthusiasm Recap: The Brain and the Balls

Curb Your Enthusiasm

Vertical Drop, Horizontal Tug
Season 12 Episode 3
Editor’s Rating 5 stars

Curb Your Enthusiasm

Vertical Drop, Horizontal Tug
Season 12 Episode 3
Editor’s Rating 5 stars
Photo: John Johnson/HBO

There’s a concept in Judaism called “B’shert,†which comes from the Yiddish word for “destiny.†It’s mostly referenced at Jewish weddings to assert that the union of Bride and Groom was preordained, even if they met on Hinge. But it can also be used to describe any event that seems just too serendipitous for it to happen without a divine hand pulling the strings.

So, at the beginning of the episode, when Larry bumps into Sienna Miller at the airport coming back from Atlanta and she calls it “b’shert,†it can almost be seen as a frame for the ensuing events and an overall thesis of the show. Nothing in Larry’s world is ever forgotten, whether by him or the Man Upstairs. Every event requires causality; as in life, decisions build upon one another, and consequences can sometimes feel like punishment. How those consequences will unfold is the great pleasure of watching Curb, knowing that Larry, Our Creator, is in full control, even as his fictional counterpart is not.

In the context of the Sienna Miller encounter, we’re made to believe there might be some truth to the whole “b’shert†thing. Amidst one of Irma’s typically repulsive monologues about her foot calluses, Larry stumbles upon Sienna Miller on TV in the universally-panned Ben Affleck vehicle Live By Night (which got a 35 percent on Rotten Tomatoes), a love-struck Larry can’t help but wonder: is another shiksa goddess in his cards? (The fact that real-life Sienna Miller recently gave birth to a child with her 14-years-younger boyfriend, about which she recently told Vogue, “I don’t think you can legislate on matters of the heart,†makes her “fateful†encounter with Larry even funnier, at least to me.) Sienna Miller is perfectly cast in this role; it reminds me of Jessica Biel’s recurring cameos in Bojack Horseman as a semi-fictionalized, exaggerated version of herself. I expect we’ll see more of Miller as the season goes on, as one of the longer-lead threads typical of late-series Curb; will Larry get rid of Irma and save his love life at the expense of her sobriety? At this point, only God knows, but Larry’s choice of words to try out in Wordle — SLEPT and ALONE — are pretty telling of where his head’s at right now. To make matters worse, Irma blurts out the answer (it’s FLUKE!), which Larry likens to “sneezing in someone’s face.†As they’d say down in Atlanta, bless her heart.

Meanwhile, Larry finds himself in the right time and place when he sits on a bench at the golf club and overhears the private golfing lesson of actor Troy Kotsur, the first deaf man to receive an Oscar for his role in Coda. The pro’s instruction — â€vertical drop, horizontal tug†— instantly clicks for Larry; though the pro accuses him of stealing the lesson, Larry claims those two minutes on the bench have changed his life. But in an unfortunate twist of fate, his golf game gets too good, and he hits the shot of his life, with the ball landing on the back of Kotsur. A sad peace offering comes in the form of a Postmates dinner. Larry lands in the office of Mr. Takahashi, the draconian country club owner whose beloved black swan Larry killed in season seven, who threatens to kick him out for good for his antics over the seasons.

But before that, he finishes his round because there are few things that would stop Larry from finishing a game of golf, especially if he’s being blessed by the gods of sport. Even the piercing howl of a coyote and the cries of the puppy it killed — even if it’s Susie’s beloved new puppy Frankie, a birthday gift from Cheryl and Ted, who Larry accuses of being “effeminate†and Susie refers to as a “high IQ genius.†(Remember when we said a dog in Curb is like a Chekhovian gun?) Though Frankie ends up being fine, Susie is predictably furious that Jeff and Larry chose to finish their game. In classic Susie fashion (and a hot pink velour getup), she goes off on Larry; in classic Larry logic, he insists that if the dog were dead, there would be nothing he could do about it. In other words, let the pups fall where they may. (A quick Public Service Announcement: as the concerned mother of a 13-pound Yorkie, I feel obligated to advise everyone to keep their dogs attended to and on a leash, particularly in areas where coyotes like to traffic. RIP Mabel.)

It’s common knowledge that one of the most unlucky things to happen to a man is getting kicked in the nuts. But when Leon’s testicles enter this episode, they’re actually a harbinger of luck. Larry sees Leon’s balls hanging out of his athletic shorts, prompting Leon to deliver one of the most absurd Leonisms yet about the connection between the brain and the balls. (See “Leonisms†for the full quote.) Larry is downright repulsed, but the turn-off proves strategically effective for him as the episode progresses. Larry hears his neighbor Duane Tubman, a descendant of Harriet Tubman, is grieving his father, so he shows face in a neighborly gesture before immediately insulting him when he finds out the deceased is actually Duane’s father-in-law. (“Terrible loss for your wife, but…â€) Disgruntled, Tubman tells Larry he has to split the cost of maintenance on the tree in his yard because it spills onto Larry’s property and he’s been taking some of its fallen lemons. But when Larry shows up at Tubman’s with Leon in his athletic shorts, a disgusted Tubman calls the meeting off, and Larry is spared the charge. When Mr. Takahashi threatens Larry, he shows up to the meeting in athletic shorts, which would be absurd on him even if he was wearing underwear underneath. Wincing harder than someone who was kicked in the balls, Takahashi dismisses Larry from his office, and once again, Leon and his nether regions have “saved the fucking day.â€

Still, that’s not the only time the chock o’ nuts come in clutch; Vince Vaughn tells everyone he’s sleeping with his neighbor to help her get pregnant with the permission of her husband, who’s “shooting blanks†(thanks, Susie). When Vince has to miss a crucial “appointment†during her ovulation window, he seeks a substitute in Leon, who claims the most virility of the bunch. Let’s just say he understood the assignment.

Back in its home turf of L.A. with the whole cast of characters— Susie and Jeff and Cheryl and Ted and Richard Lewis and even Vince Vaughn— Curb shines in this episode. So many of the threads are woven together, but still, some mysteries are yet to be revealed. Once again, Larry as Creator proves his complete control over the tight plotting and ever-hilarious banality of his own world. The episode cleverly integrates modern phenomena beloved by a certain generation, from Wordle to Theragun. Everyone announces how many rounds it took them to get the Wordle, and one of the best exchanges happens when Richard spoils it for Larry, leading them to begin a game of one-upping to see who can spoil the answer for the other first. Larry will call a friend in New York; Richard will call someone in London; Larry has a friend in Israel; Richard yells, “My friend lives on the Equator!†As someone whose family members frequently share their Wordle results in the group chat, I was laughing not only out loud but deeply, impossibly, in my bones. Curb nails the absurdity of modern life like few other shows can.

This episode was working so much better than the last. The series is really at its best when Larry is lingering on the golf course, showing up to his friends’ houses unannounced, and going head-to-head with Ted Danson in one of those quintessential “Everyone hates Larry†arguments. “He’s authentic,†Cheryl says about her husband. “He cares about people.†To which Larry responds: “I’m authentic. I care about myself. There’s an authenticity involved in caring about oneself.†And then, he spoils the Wordle.

This is Larry in his natural habitat, where he’s meant to be. And sometimes, things really are meant to be.

Leonisms

• On balls: “The brain and the balls are related. If you take a magnifying glass and put it on your balls, it’s the same pattern as the brain. That’s why people say you’re thinking with your dick.â€

• On his own balls: “My balls showed up and saved the fucking day.â€

• On the vulva: “I know ‘Vulva.’ It’s a great car. It’s one of the safest cars out there.â€

• On why Jews don’t give each other “the nodâ€: “A nod is like our ‘Aloha.’ You guys got that song already, ‘Hey Jew.’â€

• On dogs and balls: “A dog cannot be a person because a dog can’t do what people do. Now, people can do dog-like shit. Like, a contortionist in the circus? This motherfucker can bend his body up and lick his own balls if he wanted to. Do you think that motherfucker can’t lick his own nuts? Of course, he can.â€

• On sales: “I’m the dick salesman right now, right? My dick is on the market. Let me sell this motherfucking car.â€

Curb Your Enthusiasm Recap: The Brain and the Balls