overnights

How to Die Alone Series-Premiere Recap: Lift, Thrust, Weight, Drag

How to Die Alone

Stop Living / Lie and Deny / Burn Bridges / Settle
Season 1 Episodes 1 - 4
Editor’s Rating 4 stars
Lie and Deny

How to Die Alone

Stop Living / Lie and Deny / Burn Bridges / Settle
Season 1 Episodes 1 - 4
Editor’s Rating 4 stars
Photo: Ian Watson/HULU

“Black woman, 35, single. She was found in her apartment unresponsive by her neighbor.†This is probably the worst thing a dissatisfied adult female would want to hear from a doctor as she awakes from a severe head injury … especially on her birthday, no less. But those words are precisely what Melissa Jackson, Natasha Rothwell’s newest lovable character, is met with in the pilot of How to Die Alone after a mishap involving complicated Swedish furniture, a rat, and crab rangoon (with real crab, not imitation).

How to Die Alone is Rothwell’s self-proclaimed passion project, a story about how a woman’s near-death encounter propels her to change her life and face the part she plays in her own loneliness. The first four episodes drop us into Melissa’s world as an airport employee who ironically fears flying and is equally petrified of making any decision that takes her out of her comfort zone. While the metaphors may be a bit on the nose, and the show shakily straddles multiple genres — it’s a little bit of workplace comedy with its slew of hilarious employees, a little rom-com, and a sprinkle of scammer drama — Rothwell’s performance shines as the show builds to tell a relatable coming-of-age story about how terrifying it is to be in control of your own destiny. Melissa’s an electric-cart driver at JFK who works alongside her best friend Rory (Conrad Ricamora), who got her the job as his father is the president of the airport. Melissa’s job at JFK is the perfect vehicle for storytelling, as everyone knows how airports simultaneously embody a feeling of overwhelming mundanity and never-ending opportunity, which sums up where Melissa finds herself in life.

Our introduction to Melissa is a montage of her bumbling into work, getting bumped by laser-focused travelers, completely unnoticeable even to her co-workers. It’s her birthday, but Melissa feels as invisible as she always does as a background character in other people’s travel stories. To make things worse, she receives an invitation to her manager/fling turned almost-relationship Alex’s wedding in Maui, triggering her lingering feelings for him. Melissa’s 35th quickly turns into a chain reaction of unfortunate events that lead her to the hospital. When Rory bails on their plans that night so he can secretly hook up with a frequent flier named Ben, she spends the evening alone with her favorite food, putting together the furniture she impulse-bought to soothe her nerves. Ignoring the instruction’s suggestion that the furniture requires two people to assemble, Melissa successfully puts together the dresser. As she celebrates with a victory dance and a bite of her crab rangoon, which she had to fight a rat in her apartment for, the dresser falls on her, and she chokes on her takeout. For three minutes, she lost consciousness, technically dying alone, though luckily, her neighbor found her in time for the paramedics to resuscitate her.

At the hospital, the doctors diagnose Melissa with multiple injuries and a concussion, but when the nurse asks for her emergency contact because the one they have on file is her own phone number, she realizes just how alone she is. Rory doesn’t pick up her call, as he’s otherwise occupied in bed with his hookup, and she snaps at the nurse for pressing the issue. Hearing Melissa’s sharp rebuttal, Elise, the elderly woman sharing the hospital room, makes her presence known, laughing at Melissa’s audacity. They speak for a while, Elise opening up about living a life unfulfilled until deciding to take control. She notes how much she used to be like Melissa, but now she’s jumped in the deep end. The conversation is stickily sweet, only to be cut short by Elise taking her last breath. Elise’s heart monitor ramps up, ending in a plateaued hum before the nurses mention that Elise has no next of kin.

Melissa looks at Elise’s corpse and instead sees her face on the dead body, a projection of her fears of actually dying alone, causing her to comedically projectile vomit directly on Elise’s head. The hospital gives Elise’s belongings to Melissa after they discharge her, making her the sole person with the remnants of Elise’s life. Not knowing where to go from the hospital (her brother, played by the always funny Bashir Salahuddin, picks her up, though they have a strained relationship, so the car ride doesn’t last long), she ends up at a bar and spills her feelings to the bartender, Allie, who offers a listening ear and her phone number, becoming a new friend. From there, Melissa lets herself into Elise’s apartment, and if vomiting on her dead body wasn’t enough, she takes Elise’s dog Bubba and credit cards. She uses one of the cards to book a ticket to the Maui wedding after her card is declined, deciding to overcome her fear of flying.

Aside from the identity theft, Melissa’s life is revitalized by stepping into Elise’s … and by prescription painkillers. Back at work, Melissa recovers from her accident and dodges questions from her coworkers about what exactly happened (she outright ignores Rory until he apologizes and admits he ditched her for dick). However, she can’t hide her pain, so she goes on a wild goose chase with Rory to find confiscated painkillers since her Percocet prescription ran out. The journey leads them first to steal a $6,000 ham that a passenger couldn’t fly with, then to Carl, the man who handles the falcon that deters birds from interfering with the airplanes, as he might know where the airport keeps the pills they take. H. Jon Benjamin plays Carl (being a falcon handler definitely feels like one of Sterling’s side quests on Archer), and he imparts wisdom about flying that applies to Melissa’s life. Carl tells Melissa about the four forces of flight: lift, thrust, weight, and drag. He explains how lift and thrust are obvious, as they propel you upward and forward, but they need the opposing forces of gravity to gain momentum. Sometimes, the things that hold us back and weigh us down are actually what we need to take off.

They never find the pills; however, their encounter with Carl changes Melissa’s perspective, and she tells Rory about Elise and getting a ticket to Maui (she leaves out how she got it). Melissa frames the trip as an exercise in self-growth, though Rory points out the messiness of showing up to the wedding of a man she has feelings for. They’re interrupted when Rory’s father, Sam, calls them to his office after hearing about the missing ham. Melissa immediately admits to her part in shenanigans, a move that Sam is so impressed by that he suggests she apply for a management-training program to further her career. Rory hates the idea of Sam seeing Melissa’s potential and not his son’s and demands that she doesn’t apply. But Alex had already written Melissa a glowing letter of recommendation for the program. As Melissa reads his words later that evening, she recognizes how badly she wants to take her career to the next level and how much she misses the man who truly “got†her. She dials Alex’s number, and they reconnect flirtatiously while his fiancée works late.

Through flashbacks, the show establishes that it was Melissa who prevented the chance of a future with Alex despite their undeniable chemistry. Four years ago, Melissa worked at a Thai restaurant owned by a problematic white man with a penchant for verbally harassing his employees. One day, when Rory was a patron, he convinced her to stand up to her horrible boss, promising her a job at the airport. Once employed at JFK, Melissa and Alex hit it off immediately, though it’s clear that her moment of courage cursing out her boss was more of a lateral step than one moving forward — during their courtship, Melissa and Alex still go to the same Thai restaurant where she worked, still ordering the same meal. When Alex suggests informing HR about their relationship, Melissa refuses to budge, living happily in her comfort zone. She goes against her heart, telling Alex they were nothing more than a fling before crying with Rory about her fears of being vulnerable and getting rejected.

The show flashes forward to Melissa receiving her hospital bills, realizing that it would take her 47 years to pay off her debts. She attempts fraud again, but Elise’s cards are maxed out. Scrambling, she asks Rory to co-sign on a payment plan. He refuses, stating he’s trying to make better financial decisions, putting a bigger wedge in their relationship. She returns to fraud as a solution, using her brother’s social security number without permission. Soon, the tension between Melissa and Rory implodes once he finds out about the management training. While Melissa’s been on her journey, his relationship with Ben blossomed, but he doesn’t feel his bestie’s support, claiming she’s changed. Melissa tries to explain how her near-death experience changed her life, but he shuts her down, telling her to move on. Ugly feelings come out, like Melissa’s resentment from the co-sign rejection and the pressure Rory feels being Melissa’s only friend, and they both leave the conversation in tears.

Rory and Melissa avoid each other at work, and a gate lockdown due to a missing child brings Melissa and Alex’s fiancée uncomfortably face-to-face, motivating Melissa to work harder at getting over her ex by getting under another airport employee in her training class. The ordeal lasts approximately two unsatisfying minutes and ends with finding out he has a wife. She decides that she’ll never shit where she eats again, but it’s a start at putting herself out there! Melissa finds the missing child, who was hiding out of her fear of going to a new place, and she adorably teaches her how rewarding taking a chance is, referencing Bessie Coleman, the first Black woman to have a pilot’s license.

In the fourth episode, the show lays the groundwork for testing Melissa’s declaration against dating co-workers as we get to know Terrance, one of the guys who works outside on the tarmac. The two consistently have cute heart-to-heart moments, where Melissa often gets strength through his support. Though Terrance has been casually seeing flight attendant Tina, a moment at the end of the episode sets up a possible love triangle for Melissa. In an earlier scene, Terrance mentions that no matter how much he loves someone, he’ll never share his food, which is somewhat proven by his refusal to let Tina have even one of his chips. But fast-forward to Melissa reaching for a few chips, and he lets her go in for seconds and thirds. Maybe it’s not quite time to give up on a workplace love story.

How to Die Alone Premiere Recap: Lift, Thrust, Weight, Drag