Love Is Blind’s Alex on the Crucial Tim Convo the Cameras Didn’t Catch

Who else cried watching Alex Byrd and Tim Godbee date on Love Is Blind? In the pods, Godbee spoke at length about the untimely deaths of both of his sisters and described Byrd as an opportunity to give his parents another daughter. He even entrusted her with a bracelet that was originally a gift from one sister to the other. How much more locked in you can you get? But during what was supposed to be a blissful baecation in Mexico, Byrd and Godbee had such a big fight off camera that he packed his bags and almost went home. The drama continued in D.C., but again, we didn’t get to see all of it. As viewers, it’s frustrating to attempt to fill in the gaps between Byrd’s father tearfully giving Godbee his blessing and Godbee breaking up with Byrd over a plate of hot-out-the-microwave wings two days later. Byrd wishes viewers could’ve seen more, too, including the disconcerting conversation she and Godbee had right before meeting his parents and the moment he asked for his sister’s bracelet back.

What was going through your mind when Tim sat you down for that breakup conversation? It didn’t seem like you were expecting it. You had your food, you were —
I was so hungry. I was so hungry! And that food was so good, too. I thought we were going into a discussion about what this whole week has been. When his tone was like, “I just want you to sit in front of me,” that’s when I knew things were off. Because we’ve had multiple discussions where I might be at the kitchen table and he’s on the couch, or he’s in the bathroom and I’m sitting on the bed. So when he asked me to look him in the face and talk to him, I’m like, okay, I don’t know what’s happening.

Did he ask you to return his sister’s bracelet? 
Yes, he did. Literally as soon as it was over. He did it on camera. They just unfortunately didn’t show it. But he literally got up and was like, “Oh, and by the way, I need my bracelet back.” It definitely felt like a punch to the gut.

He was upset that you took a nap after meeting his parents. Can you say more about what happened after cameras cut with them? Did you say goodbye to his parents, or tell Tim you were taking a nap?  
Yeah, I was with his family all day that day. We both were, and we even had lunch. It was a really great day. I was just exhausted and had somewhere I had to be later on that evening. The day before, being with my family, it was very emotional, and I went to dinner with him after that. We were out pretty late that night. Then meeting his family, I was with them for a significant amount of time. You want to be present and engaging, so it’s a lot of energy.

One thing that was left out is that Tim actually went to the store. So I went to take a nap, and his parents were downstairs watching TV. They had driven ten hours the day before, so they weren’t just in and out. They were gonna be there for a few days. I told them, “Hey, it was a pleasure meeting you. I will see you tomorrow. I do have somewhere to be, but before I go, I’m just gonna take a quick nap before I get on the road.” That was a conversation. They were not upset.

I’ve seen some criticism of the way you hugged his parents with one arm. Do you feel like people were reading your body language wrong? 
No. I definitely wasn’t in the best mood, and it had nothing to do with them. Specifically, it was the fact that you saw Tim read the letter to my father, and it was very emotional. After that, me and him had a discussion and he was expressing that he was still on the fence with some things. And I didn’t feel comfortable bringing more family members into our union if we weren’t going to follow through with it. I knew if he were to say no or I were to say no, it would have already hurt my dad because he went through that. So I didn’t want to do that with his family. And I didn’t have any clarity on where we stood at that moment, so it was uncomfortable for me.

How did you break the news to your dad when the engagement ended?
I called him first. And then I went to his house the next day and I told him everything. He was angry, but he was also kind of sad. You know, we were really excited. He had told a lot of the family members, and said, Okay, we need to make sure it’s this day … And then it’s just like, hey [laughs], this actually isn’t happening at all. He was pretty upset.

I know he has limited mobility, but were there plans for him to walk you down the aisle in some fashion? 
Yeah, we did discuss what that would look like. I had said, “Okay, you can be in a wheelchair. Maybe my brothers can push you down, and that’ll be you giving me away.” But what got us emotional is that he was going to try to go to physical therapy as much as possible from that moment until the wedding. To be able to walk, at least, down the aisle.

Tim has said on social media that he tried to keep disagreements off camera. Was that a mutual decision, or were there times you actually wanted viewers to see more context? 
It’s been unfortunate to see a lot of things Tim has been posting over the last 24 hours. But it wasn’t a mutual decision. That was his own decision. Tim was very, very strategic on what he talked about in front of the camera, and I allowed that, because if he doesn’t want to share something, he doesn’t have to. But I will say, if something bothered him, he would not address it until after we got off camera. And sometimes it would turn into an argument, because when you come from two different worlds, you might take something a different way, and now we’re just trying to understand each other. That was one of the things we were not compatible with, was him understanding that there are two people in this relationship. It’s not just your way or the highway, or your opinion is what matters. It’s both.

Is there a specific moment that happened off camera that you wish was shown?
I think to physically see how he would shut down would have been nice. When we met his parents, his mother mentioned it briefly, how she is also the same way whenever she is in a mood or whatnot — she would shut down, and he got that trait from her. But a lot of times, our disagreements would be him just speaking and not really caring about my opinion or my thoughts. It was literally just him. We both like to talk things out. Unfortunately, Tim just talks so you can understand him, not so he can understand your side.

Tim suggested on social media that he was being manipulated, that the relationship was toxic, that you put in no effort. Do you have any response?
Well, first of all, all of that is not true. The text messages he’s posting aren’t really giving too much context. He has to put a lot of, I guess, notes on it to try to manipulate it. I didn’t call him at 5 a.m., it was like 2 a.m., and yeah, I called him to come get me. Who else am I gonna call? You’re my fiancé. I just didn’t understand what point he was trying to prove.

I feel like he’s just having a moment because now he’s starting to receive hate. And it’s unfortunate, because this is a really harsh world, and to receive any type of hate can be really intense. You just have to be mentally prepared. I don’t wish that on anyone, especially him. However, I think the way he’s handling it is not helping. And personal text messages … not that any really big information was sent, but I thought that was inappropriate. That’s his choice.

Looking back now, are there questions you think you could have asked in the pods to help you realize sooner that you were incompatible?
We both asked a lot of the right questions about what we wanted out of a relationship. But then you get into the real world. We both realized we were not compatible simply based on the physical vibe. Sometimes when you’re with someone, different mannerisms, different ways you interact, personalities, they just clash a little bit.

Because we didn’t get to see that first big fight in Mexico, there’s been a lot of confusion and speculation about how bad it was. Tim said you called him out of his name. Do you remember specifically what you said?
Um … I just know I said something that wasn’t the nicest.

Other than when you covered his mouth, did the argument get physical at any point?  
It actually wasn’t physical at all. It wasn’t that I physically covered his mouth — it was kind of like a motion, just to deescalate the situation so he would understand that his voice was turning into yelling. I was trying to calm him down because sometimes people aren’t aware of their tone. I was really just trying to make him aware that it was increasing.

Okay, people definitely thought you put your hands on him.
Yes, they’ve turned it into being physical, that I hit him and whatnot. It was never a physical altercation or fight. It was just a verbal disagreement.

On a lighter note, I think the napping community has really rallied behind you online. How does that feel?
It is so funny. I’m just riding the wave of it, because I truly do love a nap. I said that too, when I first went through the process. Somebody had asked me, “What is your favorite thing to do?” And I said, “Honestly, sleeping. I love to sleep so much.” [Laughs.] And so for that to be the thing that ends it all, I think it’s hilarious, because it is truly me. My friends have been sending me pictures of me at a party or just randomly at their house napping.

How did you sleep on the night of the breakup? 
I didn’t. I think I went to Monica’s room that night because she was already broken up with Stephen.

Oh, so he took that away from you.
He took that away from me. [Laughs.]

And you guys still haven’t had any direct communication since?
No. I do not talk to him at all.