The word “sisterhood†is invoked throughout Married to Medicine’s ten-year run, but unlike on its fellow Bravo franchise Real Housewives, it’s not a meaningless substitute for the word “cast.†Longtime core cast members Toya Bush-Harris, Dr. Heavenly Kimes, Dr. Jackie Walters, and Dr. Simone Whitmore all recall their initial motivation for joining the show back in 2013 as being rooted in reciprocal respect, not a mutual interest in being on-camera. All four women say they never had the goal of being on television; each of the doctors was established in the fields of dentistry or obstetrics and gynecology, and Toya was content being a stay-at-home mom. But when their friend urged them to audition, they stepped up.
That friend, Mariah Huq, is no longer on the show, but the bond built between the women has helped turn Married to Medicine into a fan favorite that has only grown in popularity over the course of a decade. Though it lives in the shadow of the Bravo cash cow that is Housewives, those who watch testify that nothing about Married to Medicine is second best, with at least one critic calling it “the Beyoncé of Bravo.†That sort of word of mouth has helped the show develop an expansive following over recent seasons, surprising even Andy Cohen with excitement and rapturous applause at last year’s BravoCon.
Despite many cast changes over the years (including the controversial addition of polarizing ex-Housewife Phaedra Parks this season), the core sisterhood remains, and their authenticity continues to make for great, feel-good television. The cameras are rolling, but they’re not capturing a performance, making Married to Medicine one of the rare practitioners of reality TV’s original ethos: What you see is what you get. In the wake of Married to Medicine’s tenth season premiere, Toya and Drs. Heavenly, Jackie, and Simone discussed how the show has cracked the code on long-lasting reality television.
These interviews, conducted separately, have been combined, condensed, and edited for clarity.
On an episode of Watch What Happens Live, Andy Cohen pointed out that at BravoCon 2022, he noticed “something really big†happening with the show. To what do you attribute this spike in popularity?
Toya: BravoCon was amazing. We had fans outside the hotels until almost 12 in the morning, lined up chanting. We bring such a different type of show that once you start watching, you’re invested in the family. Our show has been very authentic; nothing is rehearsed.
Dr. Heavenly: If I could attribute it to anything, it’s that we’re just real — we give our whole lives. It is an ensemble cast, and everybody comes to work in the way that they work — Dr. Jackie will never be Dr. Heavenly, and vice versa, but there’s something special about all of these people. And we show things people don’t usually show on reality TV. I mean, we watched Quad go through a tumultuous marriage and divorce, and now, this year, we have her ex-husband and his new wife.
Toya: This season, I can actually say, was healthy TV. It was refreshing and a lot of fun. There was a lot of honesty amongst everyone — but not in a disrespectful way.
Dr. Jackie: It’s orgasmic. You laugh, you cry, you may curse, you may scream. But then you leave with a breath of fresh air. You get knowledge, we make up to break up, you see white coats on, you see white coats off. It’s everything you need.
What has kept you on the show for all these seasons?Â
Toya: We’re fully vested now. They’re really good friends of mine. We actually reach out and love on each other, and I can’t imagine them not in my life. And, as long as it stays positive and authentic, why wouldn’t you do it?
Dr. Simone: There’s so much fan support and love for my marriage and my sons.
Dr. Jackie: I was originally misled to believe I was going to be this mentor, using my wisdom and calm personality. I thought it would be a cakewalk — not really. But what we show is open and honest. We even argue about who is open and honest. It puts us in places where we would have never gotten … and we get paid to do it.
Dr. Heavenly: We motivate individuals. People often consider physicians, dentists, attorneys, and doctors to be on a pedestal. But people are people, and they go through all of the same things, and other people need to see that.
When did you realize M2M was a hit?Â
Dr. Jackie: When I got a call from the White House to discuss maternal mortality. It is powerful. Somebody in the White House is watching!
Dr. Heavenly: I realized it was a hit when I would go to the airport because, honestly, to this day, I do not feel like a star. But in certain cities, you walk in, and everyone knows who you are. That’s so shocking to me, it’s surreal. We got a hit show, and after all these years, people are watching it.
Toya, as the longest-standing doctor’s wife on the cast, how has the show affected your marriage?
Toya: We look at our green screens like therapy; they ask the right questions, and we don’t always come in the best mood. It’s really a place for us to see our flaws and grow from them. Last year, my husband walked out. Now, instead of telling my husband, “I’ve been trying to tell you this for years,†I’ll sometimes casually put on the episode, and then we have a discussion. It’s helped us a lot.
One of the most pivotal moments occurred during the season five reunion when the cast successfully brought Dr. Simone and Cecil’s marriage back from the brink of divorce, urging the couple to reconcile.
Dr. Simone: When I started reunion day, I knew that I had come to the end of my marriage. Even before I got on the flight to New York, I was pressuring my lawyer to get the final document ready for us to sign. I never once thought being at the reunion would be enough to turn it around, but it really did. We filmed the reunion on a Thursday, and when I got back on Monday, the document was ready for a signature. Had it not been for the reunion, we would not have made it. There would have been nothing that would have kept us from signing. I would be divorced.
Another memorable scene was the very real physical fight between Mariah and Toya. What was it like experiencing that on camera?
Toya:  My oldest son has some friends who are fans, so it made my son want to go back and ask the questions. He said, “Mom, were you fighting?†He hasn’t seen the episode, but I can’t stop them from YouTube. Eugene and I use it as a learning tool, explaining that every parent makes mistakes just like children, and you won’t see your mom doing what she did ten years ago. I still get choked up; it was one of the most devastating things that could’ve happened. I wanted to run away, and my husband said, you cannot leave M2M like that. I prayed on it, came back the next season a different person, and every chance I got, I let people see the real Toya.
M2M came along at a time when reality TV was saturated with a particular type of debauchery — many shows revolved around the entertainment industry, alcohol, partying, and promiscuity. As Black medical professionals, do you feel obligated to represent the Black community in a particular way?
Dr. Jackie: We feel that every day we wake up.
Dr. Simone: What I have discovered over the years is that our Black and brown children need to see real professionals on TV. It’s one of the things, even with the drama, that I’ve always been so proud of. Where else on national TV can you get real doctors? We make up only 5 percent of all the doctors in this country.
Dr. Heavenly: It’s a beautiful thing. If there’s a little girl who says, Hey, I’m not calm like Dr. Jackie. Can I be a doctor, too? If she sees that a person like Heavenly can be a doctor, maybe she’ll think she can be one.
Dr. Simone: I decided when I came to reality TV that if I came as my authentic self, I would not go wrong. There would be people, even in my family, who were a bit taken aback that I was on national TV and drinking vodka. I’m like this in my real life. I cuss with my patients! Not at them, but if we’re joking, and I’m encouraging them to push in the labor room, I may say, “Push like you’re shitting out a bowling ball!†Why shouldn’t America realize that doctors have a professional life and we have a real life as a wife, as a mother, as girlfriends hanging out? I don’t have to be formal and professional 24/7.
The show puts a lot of energy toward advocating for health care, even making time for medical missions during cast trips. What do you feel is important to highlight about the health disparities Black people face across the globe?Â
Dr. Jackie: It’s unacceptable that we even have to have this conversation about how Black people are cared for in a lesser way than anybody else. We all have red blood and a four-chamber heart. If we can be the change, we need to see where we can make patients feel valued and communicate in a culturally appropriate way. We can lessen the disparity, and we want to do it. It’s just part of being who we are.
Dr. Simone: Before 2020, with the pandemic and George Floyd’s death, people, including brown people ourselves, really didn’t realize the discrepancies in health care. We think that once we get to a certain educational level, there’s no way that someone is not going to listen to us. Or that we’re going to go to the ER and a diagnosis like a heart attack is going to be missed. But it’s happening every day. Serena Williams had a pulmonary embolism that her obstetrician didn’t even believe she had. Being able to highlight these issues in between the drama has been a magnificent thing for us.
What is one thing you want viewers to know about Black maternal and sexual health?
Dr. Jackie: Black women are dying three times more than anyone else. We should all search for a doctor who makes us comfortable. There’s someone out there who can relate to you, and you need to be heard. We want to teach people what it means to be your own health advocate. Intrinsic bias is real; we want to stop it from happening, and the way we can is to empower, inspire, and uplift the patient so that they can speak for themselves.
Dr. Simone: We, as Black people, have to put ourselves first. We have to advocate for ourselves, and we have to educate ourselves. There’s so much information at our fingertips on Google — but don’t just take Google’s word. Go to your healthcare provider, sit down, and have a decent conversation so that you know that regardless of their ethnic background, they are listening to you. If they’re not, choose somebody else, because there is somebody out there who will. We have to learn how not to be afraid of the healthcare system.
The season ten premiere introduced new cast member Phaedra Parks, who has a complicated Bravo history. What was it like filming with someone so notorious in the world of Housewives? How do you think fans will receive her role on the show?
Toya: She did the right thing — she came in with no bias. She got to know every person; she didn’t look at us as characters on the show, and she developed her own views and love for all of us. I did watch her on RHOA, but I purposely did not go back to refresh my memory because I feel like when you’re around a certain group of ladies, you adapt to that group. I don’t think there’s any character on RHOA that’s similar to anyone on this show, so it’s a very different dynamic. Fans are going to be hard on her … but they’ll grow to love her because she’s actually really funny.
Dr. Heavenly: I had one lady come up to me at a restaurant and say, “How the hell you let Phaedra on our show? She’s not married to medicine, Heavenly!†It was a joke, and we laughed, but it lets you know that our people are really watching, and they know exactly what’s going on with the show, which feels really good.
I enjoyed Phaedra. There was excitement. There were also some antennas up based on Housewives; they do things a little bit differently from what we do. But we welcomed her with open arms, and you will see how it pans out.
Dr. Jackie: Her being notorious on Housewives wasn’t an intimidation because we’re all professionals. It was exciting and interesting. We just didn’t know what to expect. She was out of her natural habitat, so we knew the adjustment would be more on her part than ours. It’s a whole new world. She’s a licensed funeral director and mortician, and she buried my father, so I already knew her on that level. She did a great job.
Dr. Simone: I was pleasantly surprised; she was always kind and full of compliments. She wasn’t for the drama and all the catty stuff you would think she would’ve been for. She’s going through a spiritual journey.
What has the show taught you about yourself?
Toya: I learned that Toya is not going to be loved by everyone, and it’s okay. It’s okay for them to have their opinion of me, and it’s okay for me to be self-reflective. Sometimes, they’re right, and I need to do better.
Dr. Heavenly: Honestly, when I saw myself on TV, and the things I would say, I’m like, wow! No wonder people be mad. Most people don’t get the therapy of seeing themselves and how they interact with people. I mean well, but things come off very raw and very hard. I think people realize my feelings are pure; I love hard, and I’m a person who is going to say how I feel, and there’s a place for that.
Dr. Simone: The show taught me that I was the captain of the petty boat! I am so petty, and I just hold on to the smallest problems that are not even that big. I almost lost my marriage over things that were really not that deep.
Dr. Jackie: Endurance. To stay strong even in the midst of the storm. And that I don’t have to be the norm. I don’t have to do what everybody thought I would.