The Onion - Vulture
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The Onion
Dec. 1, 2010
All the Details of The Onion’s Two New TV Shows The Onion has two new shows coming next month, one on Comedy Central and one on IFC. The first to premiere will be Onion SportsDome on Comedy […]
Nov. 30, 2010
Chinese Gossip Blogger Fights For Freedom To Post Celebrity Up-Skirt Photos
New today from the Onion News Network, “Chinese Gossip Blogger Fights For Freedom To Post Celebrity Up-Skirt Photos.” Freedom is a beautiful […]
Nov. 29, 2010
20,000 Sacrificed In Annual Blood Offering To Corporate America From today’s Onion: “20,000 Sacrificed In Annual Blood Offering To Corporate America” “Corporate America has always provided us with plenty,” […]
Nov. 24, 2010
Classics: ‘26-Year-Old To See Every Asshole He Ever Went To High School […] This one from The Onion is two years old, but is worth a revisit today for many of us: 26-Year-Old To See Every Asshole He Ever Went To High […]
Nov. 23, 2010
Obama Outlines Moral, Philosophical Justifications For Turkey Pardon
This week from The Onion News Network, we’ve got “Obama Outlines Moral, Philosophical Justifications For Turkey Pardon.” Come for the pointed […]
Nov. 18, 2010
A First Look at the Onion News Network’s TV Show
The Onion News Network is a goldmine, consistently pumping out amazing videos week after week. So it’s exciting to see them moving to TV with […]
Nov. 17, 2010
‘I’m sure I can figure out how a little bit of child abuse is all part of […] One of my favorite sections of The Onion is American Voices, and today’s is especially great. The subject: “According to a study from the UCLA, […]
Nov. 16, 2010
Obama Replaces Costly High-Speed Rail Plan With High-Speed Bus Plan
Today from the Onion News Network: Obama Replaces Costly High-Speed Rail Plan With High-Speed Bus Plan. See, this is the sort of […]
Nov. 10, 2010
Joe Biden, Professional Ladykiller and Boozehound My favorite part of the new piece the New York Times did on The Onion’s amazing series of pieces on VP Biden as some sort of boozin’ ladyhound […]
Nov. 9, 2010
Joad Cressbeckler May Be the Funniest Character On the Internet Right Now
The ONN is already the most consistently-funny outlet for web comedy right now, almost never putting out a dud of a video. But even by those […]
Nov. 3, 2010
Last Remaining Politician Must Rebuild Entire Government Following […] This is definitely my favorite Onion article in a while. Worth reading the entire way through, especially for the kicker at the end. Here’s a […]
Oct. 28, 2010
AA Destroying The Social Lives Of Thousands Of Once-Fun Americans
New today from the Onion News Network: AA Destroying The Social Lives Of Thousands Of Once-Fun Americans. This is so wrong, yet so amazing.
Oct. 27, 2010
Democrats: ‘If We’re Gonna Lose, Let’s Go Down Running Away From Every […] Today on The Onion, Democrats: ‘If We’re Gonna Lose, Let’s Go Down Running Away From Every Legislative Accomplishment We’ve Made’: “‘There’s a […]
Oct. 25, 2010
Yard Sign With Candidate’s Name On It Electrifies Congressional Race From The Onion, Yard Sign With Candidate’s Name On It Electrifies Congressional Race: “A blue corrugated plastic sign bearing the name of […]
Oct. 21, 2010
Tea Party Plans to Recruit More Coloreds This Fall From The Onion, of course: “In an effort to promote diversity within their political base, national Tea Party leaders gathered today in […]
Oct. 19, 2010
Thousands Of Girls Match Description Of Missing Sorority Sister
New from the Onion News Network: Thousands Of Girls Match Description Of Missing Sorority Sister. As someone who went to a big school with a […]
Oct. 14, 2010
Study: Women Always Answer Their Phones Unless They’re Having Great Sex […] From The Onion, Study: Women Always Answer Their Phones Unless They’re Having Great Sex With Someone Else: “The study revealed that 80 percent […]
Oct. 13, 2010
Trapped Chilean Miners Considering How Funny It Would Be If They All Died […] Of course, from The Onion: Trapped Chilean Miners Considering How Funny It Would Be If They All Died Right As Rescuers Completed Tunnel
Oct. 11, 2010
Biden Invites Nation’s Women To Tax Policy Discussion At Private Mountain […]
This week’s Onion News Network video exposes Vice President Biden’s plan to woo the nation’s ladies.
Oct. 7, 2010
American People Hire High-Powered Lobbyist To Push Interests In Congress From The Onion, American People Hire High-Powered Lobbyist To Push Interests In Congress: “Citing a desire to gain influence in Washington, the […]
Oct. 6, 2010
Study: Americans Get Majority Of Exercise While Drunk
The Onion News Network takes on how a bit of booze makes even the most sedentary people suddenly act like world-class athletes.
Oct. 4, 2010
97-Year-Old Dies Unaware Of Being Violin Prodigy Sometimes, The Onion crosses that thin line from funny to sad. Today’s top story, for example: “Retired post office branch manager Nancy […]
Oct. 1, 2010
Exhausted Ken Burns Urges Baseball To Stop The Onion, Exhausted Ken Burns Urges Baseball To Stop: “‘I can’t do this anymore,’ Burns said. ‘The more baseball that is played, the more I […]
Sept. 28, 2010
The Onion and Delocated Just Wanna Blow Off Some Steam
From this week’s Onion: “Federal officials on Friday unveiled a new 5,000-acre national park where frustrated Americans can blow off some […]
Sept. 22, 2010
Poll: 1 In 5 Americans Believe Obama Is A Cactus Poll: 1 In 5 Americans Believe Obama Is A Cactus, from The Onion: “According to the poll, Obama has lost favor among many voters who supported […]
Sept. 21, 2010
Joad Cressbeckler: NASA Honeyfuggling America With Nonsense Space Dreams
Joad Cressbeckler is who would fill the Bill O’Reilly role on Fox News if Fox News had existed in the late 19th century. Yet another amazing […]
Sept. 16, 2010
Ira Glass at His High School Reunion “Ira Glass Tries To Explain This American Life At High School Reunion,” from The Onion: “According to sources at Milford Mill High School’s […]
Sept. 14, 2010
All Those Years Shopping At Independent Bookstore Wasted From The Onion, “All Those Years Shopping At Independent Bookstore Wasted”: “‘I put so much time into supporting my quirky local bookshop, with […]
Sept. 8, 2010
How To Thrust Your Fat Into A More Appealing Shape From The Onion News Network: “You just make sure you soap up your arms before trying to work them through the tubes, because if they’re dry […]
Sept. 2, 2010
IT’S SO TRUE UGH I’M MOVING TO LA Ah, The Onion: “Other incidents that prompted citizens to pick up and leave included the sight of garbage bags stacked 5 feet high on the […]
Aug. 30, 2010
Victim in Fatal Car Accident Tragically Not Glenn Beck The Onion News Network, in top form: “She was just a normal kid, she wasn’t some fat, dumb Mormon fuckface who should’ve drank herself to death […]
