Forest Whitaker to Lead ‘The Patriots’

Whitaker, TWC Side Deal: You’ve been reading about those interim deals to get around the writers’ strike, and now you can see the first one in action, as the Weinstein Company green-lights Tim Story to direct Forest Whitaker in the post-Katrina sports drama Patriots, made possible by a side deal between TWC and the WGA. Also made possible by side deals: The Industry not taking three damn hours to write. [Variety]

Traci Lords to Appear in Porno: Kevin Smith goes the obvious but probably still effective route of adding Traci Lords, along with The Office’s Craig Robinson, to the cast of Zack and Miri Make a Porno, which also includes Elizabeth Banks, Seth Rogen, and Jason Mewes. [HR]

Dancy, Ritter Nab Shopaholic: Following Evening and The Jane Austen Book Club, Hugh Dancy takes half a step toward manlier movies by signing on to star opposite Isla Fisher in Confessions of a Shopaholic, which, while based on Sophie Kinsella’s popular chick-lit novels and helmed by My Best Friend’s Wedding’s PJ Hogan, is inexplicably produced by Jerry Bruckheimer. Krysten Ritter also signs on. [HR]

DeGraw Will Rock You: Gavin DeGraw releases his as-yet-untitled sophomore follow-up to 2003’s Chariot this March, featuring among others the track “Cop Stop,� which includes the lyric, “Baby I’m a cop / stop, put up your hands, and surrender to me.� Okay, don’t click the link, then. Pretend we’re making it up. [Billboard]

Daisey Explains How Theater Failed America: Following a sold-out performance this past weekend, America’s wettest monologist Mike Daisey brings his sure-to-be-controversial How Theater Failed America back to the Public Theater for five nights in April and May at Joe’s Pub. [Playbill]