The West Wing and Social Network writer showed up to an Emmy party with a noticeably swollen honker, and when pressed for details, he admitted that very fast dialogue was to blame. “I wish I could say I was in a bar fight,†he offered, “but I broke my nose writing.†How does that happen? Sorkin was reciting lines into the mirror, he said, when the mirror, displeased with the way he had written her female character, reached out and punched him. No, but his real explanation is pretty close: Sorkin was reading dialogue to his reflection until he got a little too enthusiastic — and smashed his nose into the mirror. Vulture suspects he actually tripped over a garden hose while pedeconferencing and is too embarrassed to admit that he can’t walk-and-talk like his characters, but technically that still counts as workplace injury. Here’s hoping HBO covers headbutting claims. [Ministry of Gossip/LAT]