My Jewish heritage has provided me with many gifts — an appreciation for Woody Allen movies, a comfort with questioning authority, and a killer matzo-ball soup recipe (psst, the secret ingredients are celeriac and schmaltz). But there is a tradeoff for these blessings that weighs heavily on my head, and I’m not talking about my mother’s talent for guilt. It’s my hair.
Its strands are intermittently curly — think a significantly less cool version of Patti Smith, with all the rebellious spirit and none of the poetry. The only thing rock and roll about my hair’s natural texture is its self-destructive tendencies. It vines itself into the kind of snarls you have to tear out of your comb.
To solve my dilemma, I systematically tested fifteen curly-hair styling products in hopes of finding one that would unify levels of volume — no more triangle-shaped head — defrizz throughout, and define each curl. I considered scent, ease of application, evenness of distribution, and shine. While most products had some positive effect on my mop, there were definite standouts that I will be adding to my repertoire. Find out why the viscosity of the styling product is important, plus a reminder that products shouldn’t be judged by their packaging, in the slideshow below. Like a good chocolatebabka for dessert, I’ve saved the best for last.
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Not Recommended I love how easy this product is to use — just spray and move on with your day. What I don’t love is the medicinal smell, which is... Not Recommended I love how easy this product is to use — just spray and move on with your day. What I don’t love is the medicinal smell, which is reminiscent of bug spray. My hair was less puffy, but it was still triangular; straighter toward the root and a poofy mess on the bottom.
Photo: Courtesy photo
Not Recommended “Work it” was the most specific instructional sentence on the packaging, so I decided that meant to work it evenly through damp h... Not Recommended “Work it” was the most specific instructional sentence on the packaging, so I decided that meant to work it evenly through damp hair and scrunch with a terry-cloth towel. My hair turned out soft, shiny, and under control, but it was more straight with a hint of wave than it was curly. This might just be a case of poor directions.
Photo: Courtesy photo
Not Recommended I liked this product while I was putting it on, as it's virtually odorless and distributes with ease. After it dried, I changed m... Not Recommended I liked this product while I was putting it on, as it's virtually odorless and distributes with ease. After it dried, I changed my tune. My hair was frizzy, triangle-shaped, and way too big. The texture was that of large waves rather than curls. Overall, it just didn’t provide any control.
Photo: Courtesy photo
Not Recommended This is water-based, which, the packaging claims, allows you to use it every day without buildup and reactivate at any time with ... Not Recommended This is water-based, which, the packaging claims, allows you to use it every day without buildup and reactivate at any time with a splash of water. While I did appreciate the precise instructions, the water base is runny, reminiscent of personal lubricant, and difficult to control in your hair. It has a pungent artificial berry scent. I was concerned that simply combing the product through my wet hair and leaving it be would yield a flat, straightened result, but my hair was untamed and gigantic when it dried.
Photo: Courtesy photo
Not Recommended Maybe it’s because the packaging looks eerily similar to my dad’s shaving cream, but I simply could not get past the masculine sc... Not Recommended Maybe it’s because the packaging looks eerily similar to my dad’s shaving cream, but I simply could not get past the masculine scent. The thick, mousselike texture was difficult to work through my hair, which yielded uneven curls.
Photo: Courtesy photo
Not Recommended The first red flag for me on this product was the instruction to use one tablespoon. It seemed excessive, but I rolled with it. T... Not Recommended The first red flag for me on this product was the instruction to use one tablespoon. It seemed excessive, but I rolled with it. The ginger-apricot scent smelled more like lemon and thyme to me. My curls were okay — a little frizzy, a little stringy. The hair on the crown was flat; I suspect from using too much product, per serving suggestions. I decided to give this product a second shot with more of a teaspoon amount and scrunched after application to encourage curl formation. It looked great in the morning, but my curls were gone by the end of the day, despite it being particularly humid. My hair also looked duller than usual.
Photo: Courtesy photo
Not Recommended I liked the blueberry scent of this adorably packaged hair pudding, but the texture of my hair was a mess. I ended up with one ti... Not Recommended I liked the blueberry scent of this adorably packaged hair pudding, but the texture of my hair was a mess. I ended up with one tight ringlet at the peak with the rest of my mane matted flat by the heavy product. My hair maintained its default triangle formation.
Photo: Courtesy photo
Recommended With Reservations The first thing I noticed is the light honey scent and silky feel of the product. It could almost double as hand lo... Recommended With Reservations The first thing I noticed is the light honey scent and silky feel of the product. It could almost double as hand lotion. This product yielded lovely soft curls, but the volume was still a little out of control. A good night’s sleep matted it down just enough, though, so this is a great product to use if you like to wash your hair at night.
Recommended With Reservations This one smells like a tropical vacation, and it was great for detangling my knotty hair. It dried into soft curls,... Recommended With Reservations This one smells like a tropical vacation, and it was great for detangling my knotty hair. It dried into soft curls, but they were lacking definition.
Photo: Courtesy photo
Recommended With Reservations After Googling "two-strand twists" and "bantu knots" mentioned in the instructions, I couldn’t ... Recommended With Reservations After Googling "two-strand twists" and "bantu knots" mentioned in the instructions, I couldn’t help but suspect this product was designed for a different hair type than I have on my own head. That said, it still worked decently enough on my Jewish hair. The product’s texture was easy to distribute evenly, which generated a nice set of loose curls. I did have more flyaways than I usually like to see, and I was not a fan of the cold-cream-like scent. The lovely loose curls from day one fell flat on day two.
Photo: Courtesy photo
Recommended Confession: this was my go-to product before I embarked on this styling product journey. It has a refreshing, soapy scent with a hint... Recommended Confession: this was my go-to product before I embarked on this styling product journey. It has a refreshing, soapy scent with a hint of rosemary. The instructions are easy (read: you don’t have to blow dry). It has no parabens or sulfates, and is ideal if you’re of the DevaCurl oil-based, heat-free school of thinking about curly hair (which, by the way, I learned from this man). At first, it yields well-defined but invitingly soft curls. The only drawback is that this product is somewhat lacking in hold. The curls flattened out toward the roots by the end of the day.
Photo: Courtesy photo
Recommended With its whipped texture and piña colada scent, you could have easily convinced me it was a tub of vegan frosting. It yielded ... Recommended With its whipped texture and piña colada scent, you could have easily convinced me it was a tub of vegan frosting. It yielded soft, even waves with nice volume on the crown that carried down through each tress, though the ends did poof out into a slight triangle formation. I was able to overlook the subtle pyramid shape since this product earns so many bonus points for each of its hippie buzzwords; it’s fair trade, sustainably produced, and has no parabens, phthalates, sulfates, animal ingredients, synthetic fragrance, synthetic color, animal testing, gluten, PABA, or a bunch of other acronyms that I didn’t even know I had to worry about. Photo: Courtesy photo
Highly Recommended I have been using this product almost daily since I first tried it. This spray functions a little differently from the other i... Highly Recommended I have been using this product almost daily since I first tried it. This spray functions a little differently from the other items in this test in that it’s more of a finishing product than a curl enhancer, but it’s invaluable. One or two spritzes and a quick swipe of my fingertips through my mane et voilà! my flyaways and frizz are gone. This spray also makes your hair a little shinier without feeling greasy.
Highly Recommended This product is like pouring liquid silk over your head. It was so easy to run through it with my fingers that I didn’t even h... Highly Recommended This product is like pouring liquid silk over your head. It was so easy to run through it with my fingers that I didn’t even have to cheat and use my comb on my usual Über-tangles. It has a refreshing, briny scent. The waves were loose — maybe a little looser than I usually prefer — but soft and even. This one was truly is a pleasure to use, and its claims that it conditioned my hair also seemed totally valid. Photo: Courtesy of Sally Hershberger
All-Around Winner It is products like this from Bedhead that give us a reason to do these Obsessive Testers. It’s something I would never think t... All-Around Winner It is products like this from Bedhead that give us a reason to do these Obsessive Testers. It’s something I would never think to pick up on my own in a store, mainly owing to its odd-looking cap. From start to finish, I was blown away by the results. The little megaphonelike cap allows the tube to stand upright. The texture is sort of like Elmer’s glue —thick, but easily spreadable for even distribution while maintaining maximum hold. I have used this product several times now, and it consistently yields soft, wavy, lightweight, even curls that stay put and hold up on the second day, too.
Photo: Courtesy of TIGI
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