The Witchiest, Bitchiest Movie Monarchs of All Time
Next weekend marks the much-anticipated release of Maleficent — the cheekbone-heavy Disney reinterpretation of Sleeping Beauty, featuring Angelina Jolie as spurned lover turned infant-cursing witch. The film, which stars Elle Fanning as Aurora, offers a Freudian look into the development of the title character, revealing the course of events that turned a perfectly nice fairy into a resentful, horn-wearing sorceress — all set to a Lana Del Ray soundtrack. It’s a chance to see Angelina Jolie with goat pupils and contemplate the evolution of evil.
Of course, diabolical female monarchs are a movie trope with roots that go as far back as any, from Shakespeare’s Queen Tamora, a villain so evil she ends up eating a pie baked with the bone dust of her two dead sons, to the Brothers Grimm’s Mirror Queen — who drinks the blood of 12 virgins to restore her beauty. Modern-day screenwriters — responsible for the likes of Game of Throne’s Cersei Lannister, the most loathsome queen currently on TV, known for her bitchface, incestuous relations, and general bad attitude — have plenty of real-life witches to look to for inspiration: Take, for example, Elizabeth Báthory, the Hungarian socialite believed to be one of the most prolific female serial killers in history (she was eventually imprisoned in 1610 for torturing and killing an undetermined number of servants and women of lesser nobility), or Queen Mary — namesake of the tomato juice and vodka cocktail — who executed over 280 religious dissenters during her five-year rule over England.
Click through the slideshow to see our picks for the most delectably diabolical and genuinely horrifying on-screen queens of all time, responsible for everything from child abduction to eternal winter to corset-induced asphyxiation.
Maleficent,
Maleficent This Sleeping Beauty remake gave Vivienne Jolie-Pitt a chance to make her on-screen debut and Angelina Jolie a chance to ...
Maleficent,
Maleficent This Sleeping Beauty remake gave Vivienne Jolie-Pitt a chance to make her on-screen debut and Angelina Jolie a chance to play her favorite Disney character. It also seems likely to include a suprise-she's-not-all-evil plot twist.
Photo: Disney Enterprises
Queen Tamora,
Titus No one loved reprehensible female monarchs as much as William Shakespeare. Perhaps his bloodiest play, Titus Andronicus was...
Queen Tamora,
Titus No one loved reprehensible female monarchs as much as William Shakespeare. Perhaps his bloodiest play, Titus Andronicus was wildly popular when it was written but fell out of favor during the Victorian era for tasteless violence. A tale of extensive revenge plots between Titus and Queen Tamora, the story ends shortly after Tamora accidentally eats a pie baked with the ground bones and brains of her two sons.
Photo: ©20thCentFox/Courtesy Everett Collection/©20thCentFox/Courtesy Everett Collection
Queen,
Snow White As per usual, the Disney version of this ubiquitous fairy tale omits the juiciest detail from the original Brothers Grimm's ta...
Queen,
Snow White As per usual, the Disney version of this ubiquitous fairy tale omits the juiciest detail from the original Brothers Grimm's tale: Before resorting to the dreaded poison apple to rid the world of Snow White, the evil queen attempted to asphyxiate her with a too-tight corset.
Photo: ©Walt Disney Co./Courtesy Everett Collection/©Walt Disney Co./Courtesy Everett Collection
Anjelica Huston,
Ever After Technically a baroness, Anjelica Huston’s interpretation of the evil stepmother in Ever After is delightfully despi...
Anjelica Huston,
Ever After Technically a baroness, Anjelica Huston’s interpretation of the evil stepmother in Ever After is delightfully despicable: In 16th-century France, Huston strips Drew Barrymore (a.k.a. Danielle, a.k.a. Cinderella) of her title, makes her a servant in her own home, and, ultimately, ends up a laundry maid.
Photo: ©20thCentFox/Courtesy Everett Collection/©20thCentFox/Courtesy Everett Collection
Queen Narissa,
Enchanted It takes a pretty cold-blooded monarch to exile her stepson’s fiancée from animated Disney fantasy land and send...
Queen Narissa,
Enchanted It takes a pretty cold-blooded monarch to exile her stepson’s fiancée from animated Disney fantasy land and send her to Times Square. Photo: ©Buena Vista Pictures/Courtesy Everett Collection/©Buena Vista Pictures/Courtesy Everett Collection
Queen Taramis,
Conan the Destroyer An evil queen with a weakness for New Age worship, Queen Taramis tricks Arnold Schwarzenegger (Conan) into go...
Queen Taramis,
Conan the Destroyer An evil queen with a weakness for New Age worship, Queen Taramis tricks Arnold Schwarzenegger (Conan) into going on a quest to awaken the “dreaming god,” Dagoth. Needless to say, things don’t go as planned.
Photo: Everett Collection(CONAN1984TD-fsct07)
The Alien Queen,
Alien This extraterrestrial monarch becomes a major plot point in Alien 3, when Sigourney Weaver discovers an Alien Queen embr...
The Alien Queen,
Alien This extraterrestrial monarch becomes a major plot point in Alien 3, when Sigourney Weaver discovers an Alien Queen embryo is growing inside her uterus — resulting both in Weaver’s tragic demise as well as some of the most disturbing baby-bump imagery of all time.
White Witch,
The Chronicles of Narnia Similar to the plot line of Frozen, the White Witch, a.k.a. Jadis, played by Tilda Swinton, is responsibl...
White Witch,
The Chronicles of Narnia Similar to the plot line of Frozen, the White Witch, a.k.a. Jadis, played by Tilda Swinton, is responsible for holding Narnia in a state of eternal winter (no Christmas). She’s also guilty of kidnapping, turning people to stone, and various other reprehensible offenses.
Photo: ©Walt Disney Co./Courtesy Everett Collection/©Walt Disney Co./Courtesy Everett Collection
The Mirror Queen,
The Brothers Grimm In this fictionalized Bothers Grimm biography, Monica Bellucci plays a villainous, 500-year-old Thuringian ...
The Mirror Queen,
The Brothers Grimm In this fictionalized Bothers Grimm biography, Monica Bellucci plays a villainous, 500-year-old Thuringian queen who must drink the blood of 12 virgins to restore her beauty.
Photo: ©Dimension Films/Courtesy Everett Collection/©Dimension Films/Courtesy Everett Collection
Queen Bavmorda,
Willow This 1988 fantasy film begins with Queen Bavmorda — played by Jean Marsh — imprisoning all pregnant women following a pro...
Queen Bavmorda,
Willow This 1988 fantasy film begins with Queen Bavmorda — played by Jean Marsh — imprisoning all pregnant women following a prophecy that a soon-to-be-born girl will bring her downfall. Other highlights include an abandoned baby on a raft, spells that turn armies into pigs, and unintentionally deployed fairy love dust.
Photo: ©MGM/Courtesy Everett Collection/©MGM/Courtesy Everett Collection
Cymbeline's Wife It’s unclear why Cymbeline isn’t one of Shakespeare’s more popular plays: It involves an unnamed wicked stepmother queen, domest...
Cymbeline's Wife It’s unclear why Cymbeline isn’t one of Shakespeare’s more popular plays: It involves an unnamed wicked stepmother queen, domestic murder attempts, fake poison, feigned proof of adultery, and a happy ending. The good news is that a present-day film adaption is set to hit theaters this year, starring Milla Jovovich as the reprehensible wife.
Photo: Thomas Burke After William Hamilton
Queen of Hearts,
Alice in Wonderland Known for her love of croquet and constant execution-order refrain, this quick-tempered tyrant strikes fea...
Queen of Hearts,
Alice in Wonderland Known for her love of croquet and constant execution-order refrain, this quick-tempered tyrant strikes fear into the hearts of everyone in Wonderland — but, it’s worth noting that Lewis Carroll’s version of the character is actually fairly harmless.
Queen Akasha,
Queen of the Damned This 2002 horror film — a loose adaption of the third book in Anne Rice’s Vampire Chronicles series — stars Aa...
Queen Akasha,
Queen of the Damned This 2002 horror film — a loose adaption of the third book in Anne Rice’s Vampire Chronicles series — stars Aaliyah as the vampire queen Akasha — her second and final acting role.
Photo: Warner Bros./See Caption
Borg Queen,
Star Trek This shiny, veiny queen — played by Alice Krige, and, in later episodes, Susanna Thompson — is a terrifying enigma. Altern...
Borg Queen,
Star Trek This shiny, veiny queen — played by Alice Krige, and, in later episodes, Susanna Thompson — is a terrifying enigma. Alternately referring to herself as “I” and “we,” and reappearing despite being destroyed several times, it’s never clear just how many of her there are.
Snow Queen,
The Snow Queen Loose inspiration for the recent Disney sensation Frozen, The Snow Queen is one of Hans Christian Andersen's most acc...
Snow Queen,
The Snow Queen Loose inspiration for the recent Disney sensation Frozen, The Snow Queen is one of Hans Christian Andersen's most acclaimed tales, featuring child abduction, amnesia-inducing kisses, and ice splinters lodged in eyeballs.
Photo: Culture Club/2013 Culture Club
Lady Macbeth,
Macbeth This power-hungry female archetype goads her weak-stomached husband into committing regicide to secure her title as the Qu...
Lady Macbeth,
Macbeth This power-hungry female archetype goads her weak-stomached husband into committing regicide to secure her title as the Queen of Scotland. She does, at least, feel some guilt in retrospect.
Photo: British Library/Robana/©The British Library Board
1
/
16