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From ā€˜Iā€™m Realā€™ to ā€˜I Luh Ya Papiā€™: Ranking J.Loā€™s Collaborations

Jennifer Lopez released A.K.A., her eighth studio album, this week, and wouldnā€™t you know it: Half of the tracks are collaborations. Thatā€™s become Jennyā€™s thing; in fact, none of her solo singles has achieved a Top 10 slot since ā€œLove Donā€™t Cost a Thingā€ peaked at No. 3 in 2001. In honor of Lopezā€™s history of relying on song partners, we ranked each of her collaborations below.

27. ā€œIā€™m Into Youā€ featuring Lil Wayne
Apparently not even Jenny was into Weezyā€™s verse, since she cut him from the songā€™s video almost entirely. If only we could, like he suggests on his rap, ā€œleave that old shit in the restroom.ā€

26. ā€œWorry No Moreā€ featuring Rick Ross
We as a country need to agree to stop tacking Rick Ross onto pop songs. His predictable lyricsā€”ā€œaddicted to fast money/white Lamborghini,ā€ as he raps here ā€” add nothing, and he clearly recorded this in one of his Wingstop franchises thousands of miles away from Jennyā€™s studio.

25. ā€œSame Girlā€ featuring French Montana
French aimlessly floats in and out of ā€œSame Girlā€ with no enthusiasm or any desire to be there. Maybe he signed a contract for two songs and wanted out when he saw the ā€œI Luh Ya Papiā€ video? A nationā€™s dreams of FrenchLo are dashed.

24. ā€œBootyā€ featuring Pitbull
Know only this: Pitbull starts the song off by calling Lopez ā€œbootyful.ā€Ā  Itā€™s as sexy as a bag of rocks.

23. ā€œFeelinā€™ So Good (Bad Boy Remix)ā€ featuring P. Diddy and G. Dep
Hereā€™s another duet with J.Lo and her former man-candy. ā€œIt ainā€™t fair now/boo let your hair down,ā€ Diddy rhymes on a remix that shouldā€™ve been tossed on a dusty shelf just like Wheezy the forgotten squeaky penguin from Toy Story 2.

22. ā€œGoinā€™ Inā€ featuring Flo Rida
Is it even possible to have chemistry with a robot that a record executive taught how to rap? This answers that question: sort of? Flo Rida dabbles in Spanish, shouting ā€œsomebody tell them please/that the club is mi casa,ā€ but it just sort of sits there like a cup of water you left out overnight and drink in the morning by mistake. Itā€™s fine, but somethingā€™s sort of off.

21. ā€œFeelinā€™ So Goodā€ featuring Big Pun and Fat Joe
Who mixed this? Someone who hated J.Lo, apparently. Pun sounds good, though.

20. ā€œDo It Wellā€ featuring Ludacris
Itā€™s clear that these two havenā€™t ever met, because there isnā€™t the slightest spark to be found here. Luda at least delivers the Spanish more convincingly than Flo Rida could.

19. ā€œTroubeauxā€ featuring Nas
ā€œBenny Medina might wanna pay me to leave ya,ā€ raps Nas. Weā€™ll pay you instead.

18. ā€œGet Rightā€ featuring Fabolous
Itā€™s nice that the two New Yorkers are on a song together, but eh, this is pretty dull.

17. ā€œAKAā€ featuring T.I.
Here T.I. invokes a higher power when rapping about J.Loā€™s ass: ā€œYou act like you want it I give you the business/Tear that shit up, girl, as God as my witness.ā€ Why does T.I. keep rapping about tearing peopleā€™s asses up in pop songs? Not appropriate, T.I.

16. ā€œLive It Upā€ featuring Pitbull
J.Lo brings out Pitbullā€™s best on ā€œLive It Up,ā€ a goofy, not-gross sense of humor that borders on parody but comes off as genuine excitement instead. Enthusiasm is good!

15. ā€œActing Like Thatā€ featuring Iggy Azalea
This duet is actually pretty historic, as J.Lo has a record of never collaborating with ladies. For this trap burner, she enlisted rapper of the moment Iggy Azalea for a girl-power anthem. It mostly works.

14. ā€œAll I Haveā€ featuring LL Cool J
Now that LL Cool J is firmly embedded in the NCIS universe, itā€™s hard to remember his days as an extremely talented rapper. While this is definitely one of his softest appearances ā€” ā€œI donā€™t believe you wanna leave like this/I donā€™t believe I just had my last real kiss,ā€ really, Todd? ā€” he and J.Lo have a nice thing going. Also, itā€™s fun to remember the old days.

13. ā€œIā€™m Gonna Be Alright (Track Masters Remix)ā€ featuring 50 Cent and Nas
ā€œAlrightā€ is peak 50 Cent territory. Iā€™m pretty sure I had this song on a Now compilation when I was a kid, and I liked it as much then as I do now, which is a lot. Look how young and fresh Nas looks in the video! I miss that Nas. New Nas is sad and uses a TelePrompTer onstage.

12. ā€œDance Againā€ featuring Pitbull
Pitbull goes for subtle sexuality on ā€œDance,ā€ a welcome change of pace from the typically in-your-face-horny rapper. (Especially since heā€™s on this list like, 400 times.)

11. ā€œLove Donā€™t Cost a Thing (Schoolyard Remix)ā€ featuring Fat Joe
ā€œJenny itā€™s all about you,ā€ Joe raps before ceding this very dated remix entirely to Lopez. While it doesnā€™t hold a candle to the original, the rapper does dedicate most of his verse to actually, you know, talking about the singer rather than going off on an unrelated tangent like some other collaborators on this list.

10. ā€œHold You Downā€ featuring Fat Joe
Wind chimes and Fat Joe donā€™t jell quite like youā€™d hope they would, but the rapperā€™s verse about the passing of Pun ā€” and how J.Lo helped him through it ā€” is pretty touching. Joe later called it a ā€œfriendship record.ā€ Friendship is a form of chemistry, too.

9. ā€œBaby I Love U!ā€ featuring R. Kelly
R. Kelly is kind of the master of slow-jam duets, and this one is goofy enough ā€” ā€œcritics and paparazzi/who gives a damn what they say?ā€ ā€” not to offend. J.Lo is feeling it, too.

8. ā€œTensā€ featuring Jack Mizrahi
Lopez enlisted NYC ballroom rapper Jack Mizrahi for a clever ā€œVogueā€ takeoff, a campy club anthem complete with a Britney jab (ā€œWe donā€™t work bitch/we serve bitchā€). ā€œI turnt it, right?ā€ J.Lo says with a giggle at end of the song. She did!

7. ā€œOn the Floorā€ featuring Pitbull
The first of Lopezā€™s five (!!!) collaborations with Pitbull over the past three years is the best of the bunch: cheesy and still memorable. Best of all, Pitbull only says ā€œdonkā€ a couple of times, which is the metric by which we should judge all Pitbull songs from here on out.

6. ā€œNo Me Ames (Tropical Remix)ā€Ā featuringĀ Marc Anthony
Itā€™s pretty awkward now, given the divorce, but this a tribute to the chemistry J.Lo and Marc had before they even shacked up together. Sorry it didnā€™t work out, kids.

5. ā€œDame (Touch Me)ā€Ā featuringĀ Chayanne
This is the only duet J.Lo ever recorded with Chayanne, which doesnā€™t make any sense because this is a slinky and passionate salsa track with a pretty timeless sound. Sorry, Chayanne, Flo Rida came calling, I guess.

4. ā€œJenny From the Blockā€Ā featuringĀ Styles and Jadakiss
Iā€™ll say this: Jenny had more going with her rappers than with the super-awkward Ben Affleck, who appears in that video. Never forget Ben Affleckā€™s awkward performance in this video.

3. ā€œI Luh Ya Papiā€ featuring French Montana
Yes, yes, a thousand times yes to this Detail production. Even French Montana is on his game! Why is he dating Khloe? Why canā€™t he date J.Lo instead?

2. ā€œIā€™m Realā€Ā featuringĀ Ja Rule
I mean, this is a damn classic. Ja Rule just got out of jail, J.Lo; did you lose his number?

1. ā€œAinā€™t It Funnyā€ featuring Ja Rule & Caddillac Tah
If you havenā€™t sung along to this summer bop while driving in a car with the windows down at some point, youā€™ve only lived half a life. Hello, Ja. Please never go away again.

Ranking 27 Jennifer Lopez Collaborations