@MinkaHunter is an overcaffeinated Albuquerque mall teen in her 30s seeking a cushy internet job with name-brand seltzer benefits and access to a heart shaped jacuzzi. She’s been described as a “spider bitch from hell,†“relentlessly bleakâ€â€™ and “body double from a late era godard movie that nobody saw or liked,†as well as, “I think @minkahunter’s aesthetic is essentially hot older sister of the protagonist in a late nineties teen show set in space.†In lieu of plugging anything of her own she’d like to point readers to this fundraiser for the family of an Terence Crutcher, an unarmed man recently murdered by police in Tulsa.
This week Hunter talked to me about three of her favorite tweets, plus Garfield, Shania Twain’s catsuits, and how Twitter affects the mourning process.
Hunter: My friend got these fancy lady branded Bic pens at her campus bookstore and jokingly gave them to me. I Immediately tweeted the picture and my dipshit comment and went back to watching King of the Hill or whatever it is that I do. The “my beautiful fucking [body part]†bit has been a thing on my twitter ever since I tweeted about a bat flying into “my beautiful face†at work and I thought my follower friends would find it amusing and maybe lovingly roll their eyes at me. My math was wrong. It got lots of quote tweet love at the expense of my mentions, but also a surprising number of people (angrily) thought that I invented the pen or I didn’t understand what marketing was. Unsurprisingly, several dudes thought that I should focus on the “real issues†and not tweet about pens when there is war in the world etc. Personally, I prefer to tweet with my head lodged up my beautiful fucking ass and ponder issues like: is slimer rich? And does anyone have an HBO Go password?
Do you often run into that sort of thing, where you tweet something for friends/followers that strangers take out of context? Does that change the way you tweet at all?
All the time. The biggest misconception is that when I’m using a tweet to highlight something I think is silly or ridiculous (like the pens), people read that as me being angry or outraged. I tweet about what’s in front of me and with a few exceptions, I max out emotionally online at “incredulous†or “garfieldthrowinghisfooddish.jpegâ€
Every now and then I will log on to point out that Piers Morgan a dork-ass bitch or whatever, but when I have feelings about something serious, I lean towards retweeting more relevant voices on the subject than my own.
Do you have any other favorite bits or phrases you frequently return to on your Twitter?
I talk about being a beautiful and rowdy dipshit frequently….for transparency. I tweet about my interests relentlessly enough that my mentions explode every time Sean Paul or Shaq do anything or if a bodysuit goes on sale or if they hear “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now†on the radio.
I was running on a treadmill after looking at way too many gifs of Shania Twain in the “That Don’t Impress Me Much†music video, where she dons a hooded (!!!) leopard print (!!!) catsuit (!!!) and clearly is not here for your shit. As someone who lives for Laina Rauma’s one piece creations and has never smiled in her life, this really resonated with me. I started imagining Shania interrupting the Gettysburg address and dunking on Jonas Salk for thinking he’s “something specialâ€. Because that’s what beautiful dipshits think about on the treadmill. Personally though, I am impressed with the polio vaccine.
How would you succinctly describe your Twitter to someone who hasn’t seen it before?
I would recommend them a good book instead. Maybe a Garfield anthology.
What are the main similarities and differences between your Twitter persona and your voice IRL?
The Twitter format has fairly accurately showcased my IRL voice, which is mostly unfinished thoughts, abrupt observations and disjointed narratives that no one asked for. Minus any of the depth or context, of course.
Do you think there are key elements of your personality/life that don’t get shown on your Twitter?
Absolutely. My twitter is basically a skimming of the scum on top of my stagnant pond of a personality. But, you know, in a swaggy way.
During my time on Twitter my father died. It was one of those things that I needed to talk about, but didn’t want to be a downer or too publicly vulnerable. Sandwiched between many uncomfortable jokes and regrettable mourning-related aphorisms were a series of tweets about his relentlessly rowdy and petty behavior. I remember him telling me this story as clear as day. 10,000 years ago he was working as a fisherman and a saw a foe cruising by in a power yacht. He picked up a dead shark (it happens, I guess) and lobbed it right into his fancy ass boat, hitting the him in the arm. He also used to drain the jelly out of donuts, replace it with mustard and give them to people who crossed him.
How, if at all, did Twitter aide (or otherwise affect) your mourning process?
Any time you are earnest on social media you put yourself at risk to receive some really out of pocket and unkind comments. And that definitely happened. That said, so many people reached out to me in a non-invasive and supportive way. I didn’t have a lot of that IRL, so it truly had a positive impact on me. I was too overwhelmed at the time to individually express thanks to everyone, but Thank You. I appreciate you.
Do you regret any periods of time on Twitter when you look back at them?
Probably everything before 2013. One of my best friends loves to roast me for my overuse of hockey related hashtags and tweets about my Wii Fit…..and I deserve it. Also, I would like my 2010 eyebrows stricken from the record.
Jenny Nelson lives and writes in Brooklyn.