Someone please get Idris Elba a bike: All other means of public and private transportation are shaping up to be his personal circles of hell, at least on the Apple TV+ series Hijack. After using his corporate negotiation skills — because that’s his profession, remember? — to survive a plane-jacking by a mysterious international crime syndicate in season one, Elba’s Sam Nelson is scheduled to return and (presumably) get his mode of transportation hijacked once more for the eventual second season of Hijack, where he’ll be joined by newly announced cast regulars Toby Jones (Mr. Bates vs. the Post Office), Lisa Vicari (Dark), and Christiane Paul (FBI: International).
Plot details remain scant, though the addition of Vicari and Paul, who are both German, raises the likelihood that Nelson’s next hijack-vaganza could either take place in or somehow involve the famously transportation-forward nation of Germany. But what, exactly, will be the vessel that gets snatched this season? Rejecting the option of simply waiting with bated breath, Vulture’s resident Infrastructure Week enthusiasts have gathered to present a number of options. —Nicholas Quah
A bus
Listen, there’s been a need for a Speed remake for decades. Plus, the likely German setting suggests a rumble on the Autobahn — the country’s finest contribution to automobile culture. (Ignore Mercedes-Benz, Porsche, BMW, and all other high-end car brands.) —N.Q.
A big ferry
Operating under the casting-announcement assumption that the series’ second season could be partially set in Germany — and since the first season did so much hopping around geographically — I’m looking forward to a ferry-set scenario, possibly traveling between European nations. I want people running up and down the levels of the ferry, I want churning water splashing up on people and making the decks overly slick, I want something that rivals The Dark Knight’s climax in terms of “Hold up, is someone going to blow up this boat?†tension, and I have faith in Idris to give that to us. —Roxana Hadadi
The shinkansen
When you stand on the platform at a Japanese high-speed rail station and the train goes past without stopping, it makes an incredible wooosh sound. There are also little coffee vending machines that warn you about exactly how long you have to wait for the coffee because the train stops so quickly. And if you’re on one of the luxury cars, the attendants do a little bow every time they open and close the doors. That’s all great hijacking gag material. —Kathryn VanArendonk
A Viking river cruise
Can’t you just see Toby Jones as a moneyed, beige-sport-coat-wearing older gentleman who becomes so annoyed — and annoying — during the hijacking that he ends up getting thrown overboard somewhere on the Rhine? Either that or he’s an innocent-seeming cruise passenger who’s secretly the sinister mastermind behind the hijacking. —Ray Rahman
A golf cart
What could be more high stakes for Apple TV+’s upper-middle-to-upper-class target demo than to watch a golf cart careening out of control on a country-club course, forcing at least a couple of members to actually carry their own clubs. A mixture of action and horror. —Jen Chaney
A hot-air balloon
Because The Aeronauts and the hot-air balloon emergency in this season of Bridgerton weren’t enough. These floating gasbags are an inherently absurd mode of transportation, and they also double as an explosive because of all that fire onboard, so you know they’ll give Hijack the danger it requires. Kind of amazing that hot-air-balloon engineering has not meaningfully progressed in more than 200 years! But I look forward to Idris using his negotiating skills on a piece of outdated technology. —R.H.
A chartered yacht
Look, I have no idea what someone would seek to gain from hijacking a filming of Below Deck (or whatever non-NBCUniversal-owned stand-in title this Apple show comes up with), but I would sincerely love to find out. —Genevieve Koski
A Tesla Cybertruck
I’d watch 82,347,587 hours of Idris Elba trying to get the app to work as pieces of the truck fall off during a high-speed chase. There would also be a deus ex machina stroke of luck as the truck inadvertently bricks up and foils the antagonist’s plans in the penultimate episode. Tim Cook, make the Tesla truck Hijack season happen! —Nic Juarez
One of those party bikes that groups of tourists get drunk on
If you think it sounds like a nightmare to be trapped pedaling away through a touristy city on a covered Pedibus for your friend’s boozy milestone birthday or bachelorette party, just imagine doing that but you’re stuck next to a hijacker — and Idris Elba onboard to flirt with. When the alcohol runs out, things will truly get dire. —Tolly Wright
A Zamboni
The ice at a hockey arena will become dangerously smooth unless Idris figures out how to stop this thing. —J.C.
Duck boat tour of Boston
The hijacking could be on water and on land in the same vehicle! Plus, everyone who drives the duck boat gets a fun souvenir sticker. —K.V.A.
A spaceship to Mars
Get that For All Mankind Apple TV+ crossover! Give us more space pirates trying to scam Helios! Make Idris realize that the striking workers were right! All valid thematic interests. —R.H.
A conversation
What if we’ve been thinking too literally. You could, in theory, hijack so many other things: an afternoon, weekend plans, a news cycle, this conversation. Why limit yourself to vehicles? —N.Q.
The Polar Express
Every franchise needs a Christmas special. —K.V.A.