The Traitors capped off its third season with a victorious blow to its titular characters when four Faithfuls shared the crown after banishing all the villainous Big Brother players in their midst. The winners included a former Bachelorette, a member of the British monarchy, Zac Efron’s brother, and a Housewife. Looking at them all together, it was hard not to feel proud of this motley crew of reality-TV vets. It’s a testament to the central tenet of the show: Throw a bunch of the weirdest people that reality-TV casting agents have ever found together in a castle, make them do physical labor and then have Alan Cumming say the word murder in a Scottish accent a bunch times, and the results will always be entertaining.
With that in mind, we’re continuing our yearly tradition of dream-casting our ideal Traitors crew. The ideal Traitors cast should include a mix of gamers, Bravo-lebrities, dating-show expats, assorted big personalities, and a few stuffy Brits just for fun. Below, our season-four hopefuls.
The Gamers
• Angelina Keeley (Survivor)
• Yam Yam Arocho (Survivor)
• Kim Spradlin-Wolfe (Survivor)
• Sean Rector (Survivor)
• Taylor Hale (Big Brother)
• Hayden Moss (Big Brother)
• Derrick Kosinski (The Challenge)
The Bravo-lebrities
• Nene Leakes (Real Housewives of Atlanta)
• Heather Gay (Real Housewives of Salt Lake City)
• Erika Jayne (Real Housewives of Beverly Hills)
• Tom Schwartz (Vanderpump Rules)
• Tiffani Faison (Top Chef)
• Paige DeSorbo (Summer House)
• Stassi Schroeder (Vanderpump Rules)
The lovers
• Chelsea Blackwell (Love Is Blind)
• Dave Bettenberg (Love Is Blind)
• Rachel Lindsay (The Bachelorette)
• Jesse Palmer (The Bachelor)
• Molly-Mae Hague (Love Island)
• Robert Rausch (Love Island)
Assorted personalities
• Jujubee (RuPaul’s Drag Race)
• Monet X Change and Trinity the Tuck (RuPaul’s Drag Race) (must be cast together)
• Whitney’s gay-seeming husband Connor Leavitt (The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives)
• Jasmine Pineda (90 Day Fiance)
• Gypsy Rose Blanchard
• Hilaria Baldwin (The Baldwins)
• “Baby” (The Baldwins)
• Samin Nosrat (Salt Fat Acid Heat)
• James Holzhauer (Jeopardy!)
• Ronald Gladden (Jury Duty)
Brits
• Joey Essex (The Only Way Is Essex)
• Gemma Collins (The Only Way Is Essex)
• Rev. Richard Coles (Saturday Live)
• Julian Clary (Celebrity Big Brother)
• Liz Truss (former prime minister)