Kelly Conaboy Author Archive
Give A Gift
MOST RECENT ARTICLES BY:

Kelly Conaboy

Freelancer
See all their articles from across New York Magazine
@kellyconaboy

Kelly Conaboy is the author of The Particulars of Peter: Dance Lessons, DNA Tests, and Other Excuses to Hang Out with My Perfect Dog. She has written for the New York Times, The Atlantic, and the Washington Post.

  1. things that may happen at some point
    A One Direction Reunion Will Happen, Says LiamAll thanks to your eyelash-wish.
  2. dog’s best friend?
    Rude Shia LaBeouf Tells Dog’s Secret on Television, in Front of EveryoneMan’s “best friend”? Yeah right!
  3. where are this guy’s lips
    A Farewell to Paul Ryan’s Lipless FaceGood-bye to Paul Ryan’s face, which will not be seeking reelection.
  4. oh yes who’s a good little suit boy
    Who’s This Little Sweetie in a Big-Boy Suit?Is this big boy Mark Zuckerberg? Oh, is that who it is?
  5. television
    Wait — Vanderpump Rules Was Only in Playa del Carmen for 4 Days?!This show is incredible in ways the mind can’t even comprehend.
  6. shock me shock me shock me
    Oh My God an Empire Records Musical Is Coming to BroadwayShock me, shock me, shock me!
  7. necessary advice
    Just Put the Toilet Seat DownCome on.
  8. he’s a yale guy now
    Good Job Being Accepted to Yale, Nathan Chen!A good job poem for Nathan Chen.
  9. good sports
    Here’s What We Learned at the 2018 Winter OlympicsFor one thing: Adam Rippon is just so great.
  10. good sports
    Oh My God, Figure Skating Is So Stressful to WatchWatching television has not been this stressful and punishing since the final two miserable seasons of Breaking Bad.
  11. good sports
    Why the Women of Bobsled Are the BestThe women’s bobsled winner rhymes with shmermany.
  12. good sports
    Thank God Lindsey Vonn Won That Bronze MedalIt’s not silver, and it’s certainly not gold, but it’s the third one: bronze. And that’s good enough!
  13. good sports
    Hooray for Sexual Ice Dancing, and for Brothers and SistersIt’s a shame that outside of the Olympics we do not typically gather to watch people have sex on ice.
  14. good sports
    A Wardrobe Malfunction — at the Olympics!Poor Gabriella Papadakis.
  15. good sports
    Here’s How to Handle Losing at the OlympicsAs demonstrated by Ted Ligety.
  16. good sports
    Nathan Chen Threw Down Six Quadruple Jumps Last NightChen’s six quadruple jumps launched him all the way to 5th place.
  17. good sports
    It Was a Very Intense Night at the OlympicsSome athletes barfed, some fell down, others slid their way to glory.
  18. good sports
    Celebrate Mikaela Shiffrin’s Victory by Taking a NapShe earned it, for you.
  19. good sports
    Why the Olympics Are So WindyOkay, wind, you’ve made your point.
  20. good sports
    Do You Think Chloe Kim Would Be Good at Curling?She would probably be better than you, at least.
  21. good sports
    What Song Would You Skate to at the Olympics?And would you ice dance romantically with your brother?
  22. good sports
    New Rule: If You Win a Gold Medal, You Get to Curse on TVInspired by snowboarder Red Gerard.
  23. good sports
    Which Element of the 2018 Winter Olympics Opening Ceremony Are You?I’m Yuna Kim.
  24. good sports
    A Good Luck Poem for Nathan ChenPlease read this poem aloud to help Nathan Chen win.
  25. party reviews
    L’Oréal-Covered Party Guests Swarm Blake Lively on Galentine’s DayKelly and Allie make friendship necklaces with L’Oréal spokesmodel Blake Lively.
  26. party reviews
    Alexander Wang Had ‘No After-Party,’ But Jonathan Simkhai Had ‘Yes, One’Kelly and Allie party like VIPs at the Jonathan Simkhai after-party.
  27. party reviews
    Where Was Alleged Beyoncé Fangirl Karlie Kloss at Rag & Bone’s Party?Kelly and Allie search for the 24-year-old supermodel who thinks “Waterfalls” is a Beyoncé song.
  28. party reviews
    Can Fashionable Panda Outfits Convince Pandas to Come to NYC?Kelly and Allie review the Panda Party of the century.
  29. party reviews
    Drinking Wine and Dropping Snacks Near Emily Ratajkowski at InStyle’s FW PartyWelcome to the first installment of “Party Reviews” with Kelly and Allie.
  30. pietro nolita
    A Surreal Visit to the All-Pink Restaurant at the End of the WorldWe went to Pietro Nolita two days after the election.
  31. field trips
    I Spent a Weekend With the Most Grateful Gilmore Girls Fans in the WorldThere are few times in life when one gets to dive so deeply and shamelessly into her small, dorky obsession.
  32. recommendations
    Take a Deep Dive Into Bizarre Celebrity Gossip With This PodcastThis Week Had Me Like brings you news of Adrien Brody’s art and Jon Bon Jovi’s pasta sauce.
  33. aspiration
    Why Am I Following Aaron Paul’s Wife on Instagram?“I Like This Bitch’s Life,” Lauren Paul edition.
  34. Who Said It: GG Allin or Gigi Hadid?GG or Gigi? A more difficult question than you might think.
  35. cool pope yeah right
    Pope Francis Believes God Thought the Internet Was a Good IdeaAnd on the seventh day He created the internet.
  36. fuck this fucking wage gap
    Anderson Offered Half Duchovny’s X-Files PayThe truth is out there, and it sucks.
  37. starve a cold-play
    Chris Martin Eats Nothing One Day Per Week — UhhThe Coldplay singer claims it makes him sing better and be more grateful “for everything.” All right, man.
  38. hair news
    Theorizing Hilary Duff’s New Lilac Hair: What Could It Mean?Hilary Duff dyed her hair lilac on Wednesday. Are you intrigued?
  39. bunch of guys fuckin up clueless
    Have Any of These Famous Men Ever Even Seen Clueless? Come On.Watch Bradley Cooper, Seth Rogen, Paul Dano, and Jake Gyllenhaal do a bunch of terrible Cher Horowitz impressions.
  40. obsessions
    Selena Gomez: Obsessed With Holding Hands?A look into Selena Gomez’s shocking new infatuation.
  41. 52 burgers in one year
    Gigi Hadid Eats Burgers? Yes, and You Won’t Believe How Many Per YearYou’re straight-up crazy if you think Gigi Hadid doesn’t eat a reasonable amount of burgers.
  42. mary dye
    Wildly Inappropriate Washington GOP Legislator Asks Teens About VirginityThe Republican lawmaker questioned teens who advocated for the expansion of insurance coverage for birth control.
  43. oh no zac efron
    Zac Efron, My Man — Just Post Two Separate TweetsCelebrities should pay people to veto their tweets before they post them.
  44. space flowers
    Flowers in Space? Buddy, You Better Believe ItRoses are red / Violets are blue / This flower grew in space / How about you?
  45. the flu-fighting power of estrogen
    Estrogen Protects Women Against Flu, Men Left Sick, Weak, Begging for SoupAccording to a new study, women rule and men drool in terms of halting flu-virus replication.
  46. making a twitterer
    Gigi Hadid’s Making a Murderer Tweet-StormGigi Hadid is fired up about Making a Murderer.
  47. old men trying to understand gifs
    Leonardo DiCaprio Has No Idea Where GIFs Come From or How They Are Even Captured“It’s amazing what goes viral these days.”
  48. There’s a Sexy, New Guy Trying to Get Your AttentionAnd his species was newly discovered. Mmm, mm.
  49. Muh-oooooooooooom Knits Life-Size Version of Son for CuddlingIf you would cuddle with Mommy more, maybe Mommy wouldn’t need to knit you out of yarn and allow yarn-you to become a viral sensation.
  50. caption contest
    Caption This: Fan Interrupts Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris’s Romantic EveningHe posted a photo of it on Instagram, which you will now caption.
More Articles