Listening, interrupting politely and moving things on

Speaker 1: (TO AUDIENCE) We speak to communicate all the time, with our friends, our family and at work, and there are techniques we can use to help us communicate more effectively.

Speaker 2: (TO OTHER PEOPLE) What's it looking like to you?

(SPEAKER 3 WORKS ON COFFEE MACHINE)

Speaker 1: (TO AUDIENCE) Like listening.

And showing that we're listening, with a nod, a smile and making eye contact with the person that’s speaking.

Little things we do day to day, without thinking, but help to show we're paying attention.

Speaker 3: (TO OTHER PEOPLE) The pump needs replacing and the whole machine needs a service.

Speaker 2: The whole machine needs a service!

Speaker 1: (TO AUDIENCE) Just repeating some key information shows that you're listening and understood the other person.

Questions are great too.

Speaker 2: (TO OTHER PEOPLE) Can you replace the pump now?

Speaker 3: I can do a temporary fix while I'm here but I’ll have to come back on Tuesday to sort it out properly.

Speaker 2: And can you do the service at the same time?

Speaker 3: Uh, yes, I could do both on Tuesday.

Speaker 2: OK.

Speaker 1: (TO AUDIENCE) There's no better way to show you're listening and understand situations than by asking questions.

Speaker 2: How much is all that going to cost me?

Speaker 3: Well, with my call-out charge, £200.

Speaker 1: (TO AUDIENCE) Even if you might not always like the answer.

Speaker 1: It was good.

Speaker 2: No, no, no. It was awful. It was way too long.

Speaker 3: (TO AUDIENCE) We're having a discussion about a film we've just been to, and it's not going very well.

But there are ways you can contribute to a discussion to make them go better.

Listening to other people is a good start.

Speaker 1: (TO OTHER PEOPLE) So I’m paying £15.

Speaker 2: It was just some man in a room.

Speaker 3: (TO AUDIENCE) Taking it in turns in a discussion is really important.

And when it is your turn, speak clearly, be audible and pace yourself.

Speaker 4: (TO OTHER PEOPLE) In my opinion this was even better than the first film.

The music was amazing!

Speaker 2: It was the same old stuff, all over again and it went on and on and on…

Speaker 3: (TO AUDIENCE) It’s not good to go on and on.

But if I want somebody to be quiet, even if they’re annoying me, I need to use a tone that’s appropriate. Friendly but polite.

(TO OTHER PEOPLE) So, it’s really good that this film has given us so much to talk about.

How about I go and get us some more coffees?

Speaker 1: Eughh! No coffee! Please!

Speaker 2: What? Coffee’s brilliant.

Speaker 3: (TO AUDIENCE) At least now we're taking turns to disagree.

Speaker 1: It will rain! It always rains.

Speaker 2: If it's sunny, we’ll want to be outside though.

Speaker 3: He's right. It'll rain.

Speaker 2: But what if it doesn't?

Speaker 4: (TO AUDIENCE) Ever feel like a conversation's going round in circles?

Sometimes joining in a discussion just isn't enough. You need to help to move things forward.

(TO OTHER PEOPLE) So why is it so important that we have the whole party outside?

(TO AUDIENCE) Sometimes an open question, like that, without a yes or no answer, can help us to understand more.

Speaker 2: (TO OTHER PEOPLE) Because it's a summer party.

Speaker 1: I see what you mean…

Speaker 4: (TO AUDIENCE) Empathising and showing you understand someone else's point of view is really useful, even if you then want to disagree.

Speaker 1: (TO OTHER PEOPLE) Why not have an inside space as well?

Speaker 4: (TO AUDIENCE) And sometimes just summarising the points so far can help solve the problem.

Speaker 2: (TO OTHER PEOPLE) Great.

So we all like the idea of an outdoor space, somewhere in a park maybe, but near indoor facilities in case it rains?

ALL: Yes!

Speaker 2: So, what day shall we have the party?

(THEY ALL TALK OVER EACH OTHER)