With the negotiating between MTV and the cast of the Jersey Shore for a second season of the network’s biggest show in years seemingly stuck in a salary-related stalemate, we prefer to focus our energies on reliving the glories of the first, wholly untainted season. Because, let’s face it, as much as we’d love to see Shnickers Snooki, the Situation, and the rest of the cast rake in enough dough that they need never to worry about paying their GTL bills for the rest of their lives, it’s going to be darn near impossible for the parties involved to replicate the unadulterated joys of their Sleazeside summer of ‘09. Yet it’s important to remember that we’ll always have that first season and its wealth of catchphrases to look back fondly upon. Speaking of which, last week we asked for the assistance of you, the loyal Vulture reader, in helping to determine the top ten catchphrases of the season. And so, without further ado, here are the results!
10. “I went on one ride, God bless me, it’s fuckin summah!†—Pauly D (13 points but, more importantly, this was a Vulture reader write-in!)
8. It’s a tie between:
“Unbelievable, huh, Snooks? It’s so hard to find a good man these days. That’s why I date women.†—Pauly D (15 points)
“Have I got girls every day? Have they not been pretty? Some days no, some days yes.†—Mike “the Situation†(15 points)
7. “I feel like this is beneath me. I’m a bartender. I do great things.†—Angelina “Jolie†(17 points)
6. “My hair’s windproof, waterproof, soccerproof, motorcycle proof. I’m not sure if my hair’s bulletproof, I’m not willing to try that.†—Pauly D (19 points)
Thank you to everyone who contributed, not just to this poll, but to the Jersey Shore threads all season long. We’re over the moon with the response that you had to our recaps and our coverage, so let’s just keep our fingers crossed that MTV has the good sense to bring the cast back for another season (and, let’s face it, $10K per cast member per episode is a pretty sweet deal for all parties involved).
4. “I told him to put me down because I’m not trashy. Unless I drink too much.†—Nicole “Snooki†(28 points)
3. “I necessarily didn’t want to bring back any zoo creatures whatsoever. These broads probably smelled the food at the house.†—Mike “the Situation†(31 points)
2. “Gym, tanning, laundry. You know, that’s how they, like, make the guidos.†—Vinny (44 Points)
1. “You know what? You’re excluded from dinner, then. You’re excluded from Surf-and-Turf Night. You’re excluded from Ravioli Night. You’re excluded from Chicken-Cutlet Night.†—Mike “the Situation†(60 points)
Thank you to everyone who contributed, not just to this poll, but to the Jersey Shore threads all season long. We’re over the moon with the response that you had to our recaps and our coverage, so let’s just keep our fingers crossed that MTV has the good sense to bring the cast back for another season (and, let’s face it, $10K per cast member per episode is a pretty sweet deal for all parties involved).
Until next summah,
—Juice Springsteen