During The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug, the elf prince Legolas (Orlando Bloom, returning to the role) gives Tauriel (a new elf character played by Evangeline Lilly) such penetrating looks, we got to thinking: What would happen if these two went for it, despite the fact that he’s a royal and she’s just a common Sylvan? What would elf sex even look like? We shared our impure thoughts with Bloom earlier in the week, at a screening of the movie hosted by the Cinema Society and Moncler — and he actually obliged us on the matter. “Elf sex is Tantric,” he told Vulture. Because “if you live eternally, then you got a lot of time to contemplate everything, to enjoy it.” Everything? Because Tauriel seems to be taken with the hot new dwarf on her scene, Kili, so … “A threesome?” Bloom jumps in, seeing where we’re going with this. “Is that what’s called for? I like it!” Get ready for an outpouring of slash fan fiction.