The Fug Girls: The Best, Worst, and Kookiest at the 2014 SAG Awards
Photo: Photos: Getty Images
Given that the SAG Awards are all actor, actor, actor — it’s Hollywood’s most self-congratulatory evening, in which the profession is treated with the same reverence as philanthropy and cancer research — you’d think the attendees would get dramatically gussied-up in a bid to assert superiority over the rest of the tribe. But last night, while some celebrities really brought it on the red carpet, others felt like they phoned it in. Perhaps they, like us, were confused and alarmed by a Saturday awards show, and had to scramble; unfortunately, unlike us, they couldn’t default to sweatpants. Here’s a look at who nailed it and who missed the mark, and who is the most Oprah. (Hint: It’s Oprah.)
Best Rebound: Jennifer Lawrence After her charmingly squirrelly red-carpet interview, everyone was talking about Jennifer Lawrence's (alleged) &q...
Best Rebound: Jennifer Lawrence After her charmingly squirrelly red-carpet interview, everyone was talking about Jennifer Lawrence's (alleged) "armpit vaginas," a term whose sudden renaissance probably led to at least three parody Twitter accounts. But we'd rather discuss how tremendous Jennifer Lawrence looked. It was her best Dior in an eternity, and on the heels of one that looked like she'd run afoul of a roll of tape, it was well-timed. And for the record, we think her pits looked perfect.
Photo: Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images
Worst Rebound: Julia Roberts We didn't think anything could make us look back affectionately upon Julia Roberts's crazy oxford-under-ball-gown Gl...
Worst Rebound: Julia Roberts We didn't think anything could make us look back affectionately upon Julia Roberts's crazy oxford-under-ball-gown Globes ensemble. Then she turned up at the SAGs in a catastrophic Valentino jumpsuit that boasted a heinous pair of crotches (seriously, isn't one crotch enough?) and was unflattering from every angle. The bar for the Oscars is so low, it's actually in Hell.
Photo: Getty Images
Worst Idea: Kerry Washington We're tickled by how visibly giddy Kerry Washington has been now that she's not hiding her pregnancy, and we underst...
Worst Idea: Kerry Washington We're tickled by how visibly giddy Kerry Washington has been now that she's not hiding her pregnancy, and we understand wanting to be playful. But this custom Prada is a disaster — like she's practicing for motherhood by wearing an extremely fancy bib and a splatter-proof drop cloth. Olivia Pope would've locked her in the basement.
Photo: Getty Images
Most Undressed: Sarah Paulson When Sarah Paulson came onstage to help present the clips from 12 Years a Slave, the camera caught a shot of Bradle...
Most Undressed: Sarah Paulson When Sarah Paulson came onstage to help present the clips from 12 Years a Slave, the camera caught a shot of Bradley Cooper looking doubtful. We're sure it was unrelated, but we like to think he was wondering what happened to the top of her dress. That's a petticoat, right there.
Photo: Ethan Miller/Getty Images
Best Everything Ever Always: Lupita Nyong'o We keep waiting for Lupita Nyong'o to give us The Cringe. It happens eventually with everyone; it is ...
Best Everything Ever Always: Lupita Nyong'o We keep waiting for Lupita Nyong'o to give us The Cringe. It happens eventually with everyone; it is the way of things. So that makes it even more exhilarating when she waltzes out time and again and nails it like a hammer. This teal Gucci is stunning, perfectly fitted simplicity, erupting in a heavenly neckline. Her Oscars bar is set Olympically high, but for once, we're not worried.
Photo: Ethan Miller/Getty Images
Most Effective Napkin: Cate Blanchett On anyone but Cate Blanchett, everyone would be turning up their noses at this Givenchy number. It's a sequ...
Most Effective Napkin: Cate Blanchett On anyone but Cate Blanchett, everyone would be turning up their noses at this Givenchy number. It's a sequin-trimmed serviette stuck into a Grecian gown, and it's a salute to her innate chic that we aren't immediately writing it off as absurd.
Photo: Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images
Most Thrown-Together: Claire Danes Well, Claire Danes looks amazing from the neck up. But her dress seems like someone cut the front of off...
Most Thrown-Together: Claire Danes Well, Claire Danes looks amazing from the neck up. But her dress seems like someone cut the front of off one dress and tacked it onto another. Just because Homeland felt like a random mask-up at times doesn't mean she should evoke that in her clothes. Photo: Ethan Miller/Getty Images
Kookiest: Rita Moreno God bless Rita Moreno. May we all have the joie de vivre at 82 to go out there and work a studded leather moto jacket. Seri...
Kookiest: Rita Moreno God bless Rita Moreno. May we all have the joie de vivre at 82 to go out there and work a studded leather moto jacket. Seriously.
Photo: Ethan Miller/Getty Images
Most Unusual: Julie Bowen It's nice to see Julie Bowen wearing something graphic and at least slightly funky; it's also surprising that said grap...
Most Unusual: Julie Bowen It's nice to see Julie Bowen wearing something graphic and at least slightly funky; it's also surprising that said graphic and funky gown came from Carolina Herrera, whom we normally associate with Renée Zellweger's safe and ladylike cocktail frocks. This works much better with her brash personality than the capital-G Gowns Bowen has a tendency to sport. Photo: Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images
Best Blue: Amy Adams There was a lot of blue on the red carpet last night, but no one wore it better than Amy Adams, who left the boob tape behin...
Best Blue: Amy Adams There was a lot of blue on the red carpet last night, but no one wore it better than Amy Adams, who left the boob tape behind for a night in favor of what E!'s Fashion Police will surely refer to as "old Hollywood glamour" in Antonio Berardi.
Photo: Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images
Most Unexpected Cleavage: Michelle Dockery Because occasionally, Michelle Dockery likes to remind us that she's not actually Lady Mary. Photo: Al...
Most Unexpected Cleavage: Michelle Dockery Because occasionally, Michelle Dockery likes to remind us that she's not actually Lady Mary. Photo: Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images
Best Glenn Close Impersonation: Abigail Breslin If it seems like we're being hard on Abigail Breslin, it's only because we like her. She's a tale...
Best Glenn Close Impersonation: Abigail Breslin If it seems like we're being hard on Abigail Breslin, it's only because we like her. She's a talented, attractive 17-year old who repeatedly dresses like women of a much older generation.We wish she'd find a stylist who would help her negotiation that line between celebrating her youth and dressing her bod.
Photo: Kevin Mazur/WireImage
Best Color: Sandra Bullock We didn't love the baby-blue, pink, and black Prabal that Sandra Bullock sported at the Globes, but this go-round, she...
Best Color: Sandra Bullock We didn't love the baby-blue, pink, and black Prabal that Sandra Bullock sported at the Globes, but this go-round, she stuck to one hue and made it count. The lovely color and sheen of this deep green Lanvin could've used some accessories, but at least this ought to end up on some Pinterest boards for people who need motivation to do calf raises.
Photo: Gregg DeGuire/WireImage
Shiniest Cage: Sofia Vergara Lord knows we love a metallic, and the back of this Donna Karan is very sexy indeed. But whenever Sofia Vergara move...
Shiniest Cage: Sofia Vergara Lord knows we love a metallic, and the back of this Donna Karan is very sexy indeed. But whenever Sofia Vergara moved, the bodice did not, which gave it the aura of glitzy armor, and not for nothing, if it DIDN'T feel like it weighed a ton, it certainly looked the part. Photo: Getty Images
Most Likely to Inspire a Hacky Pun: Mayim Bialik What can we say about Mayim Bialik, except that a) she may have been the only person ...
Most Likely to Inspire a Hacky Pun: Mayim Bialik What can we say about Mayim Bialik, except that a) she may have been the only person there wearing anything CLOSE to "radiant orchid," despite Giuliana Rancic wrongly telling everyone else they were in Pantone's color of the year; and b) she looks like the receptionist at a brothel, which only works if your Big Bang Theory involves a whole other kind of explosion. And indeed, there it is.
Photo: Ethan Miller/Getty Images
Best Oprah: Oprah We were going to give this one to Tom Hanks, obviously, but then we decided Oprah Winfrey should take it. We love it when the O...
Best Oprah: Oprah We were going to give this one to Tom Hanks, obviously, but then we decided Oprah Winfrey should take it. We love it when the O goes big: big hair, big brooch, big color. Big win. Photo: Theo Wargo/WireImage
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