If you’re a guy who sucks at holiday shopping, Andy Richter swooped in to save the day during last night’s Conan by sharing his unique – and admittedly very expensive and complicated – gift buying guide for guys only. Sure, it involves moving to Illinois and suffering a substantial injury to your balls, but with a payout like $73,537, it’s a move you can’t afford not to make – plus it’ll all be worth it when your child’s face lights up after unwrapping their $12,000 Hermes bicycle.