Sadly Matt Damon did not win a Best Actor Oscar for The Martian at last night’s Academy Awards. He did, however, get to curl up against Ben Affleck’s chest like a baby koala under a giant sweaty coat for an absurd amount of time on Kimmel, and most people would consider that a solid second-place prize. Damon also failed to quash his ongoing comedy beef with Jimmy Kimmel and was forcibly slid offstage by the show’s staff, but still. He got that Ben Affleck coat womb-pouch experience. No one can take that away from him.
