When discussing the greatest communique ever sent by “A†in Pretty Little Liars history, arguably nothing will top the original text sent to all four girls by the mysterious cyberstalker in the pilot: “I’m still here bitches, and I know everything.†Concise, simple, and utterly terrifying. But with each passing season, A’s messages became increasingly more complex, ranging in style from the mind of a cheeky teenager to a fully fledged psychopath. The delivery, too, became more nuanced — what began as simple texts via cell phones developed into messages in the form of newspaper classifieds, balloons, wind-up dolls, Magic 8 balls, even human-teeth necklaces. (The A team, clearly, had a lot of spare time on their hands.) Before the seventh season premieres Tuesday night, take a trip down memory lane and relive some of the most shockingly memorable — and just plain amusing — messages A has sent Rosewood residents throughout PLL’s history.
1. “Be careful, Hanna. I hear prison food makes you fat.†(To Hanna, season 1, episode 1.)
2. “Did you get a goodnight kiss? Here’s one from me. xo…†(To Emily, season 1, episode 2.)
3. “Heads up, BFFs. It’s open season on liars and I’m hunting…†(To Aria, Spencer, Hanna, and Emily, season 1, episode 3.)
4. “Lucky you, Aria! Other girls have to do their homework. You get to do the teacher…†(To Aria, season 1, episode 5.)
5. “DO IT RIGHT. I’LL BE WATCHING. JUST LIKE TOM SAWYER.†(To Spencer, season 1, episode 8.)
6. “CAMP MONA’S A SCAVENGER HUNT AND I’M THE PRIZE. COME AND FIND ME, BITCHES.†(To Aria, Spencer, Hanna, and Emily, season 1, episode 10.)
7. “SORRY ABOUT LOSING MY TEMPER. MY BAD.†(To Hanna, season 1, episode 11.)
8. “OINK OINK.†(To Hanna, season 1, episode 15.)
9. “It’s not over until I say it is. Sleep tight while you still can, bitches.†(To Aria, Spencer, Hanna, and Emily, season 1, episode 22.)
10. “YOU CAN’T PLAY CAT AND MOUSE IF THE MOUSE MOVES TO TEXAS. I NEED YOU HERE, EM. CONGRATS!†(To Emily, season 2, episode 3.)
11. “Sometimes the shortest distance from plot A to plot B is the long way around.†(To Emily, season 2, episode 5.)
12. “MY DRESSES. MY GAME. MY RULES.†(To Aria, Spencer, Hanna, and Emily, season 2, episode 6.)
13. “HEY EM, SOME CREAM WITH YOUR COFFEE?†(To Emily, season 2, episode 8.)
14. “SEE HOW EASY IT IS FOR ME TO GET MY HANDS AROUND YOUR NECK.†(To Emily, season 2, episode 10.)
15. “No fun chugging lake water, is it? Choke on this bitch.†(To Hanna, season 2, episode 16.)
16. “NEXT TIME IT’LL BE YOUR FACE, NOT THIS PUMPKIN.†(To Alison, season 2, episode 17.)
17. “Call off your techno-boy-toy or I tell the cops what your mom keeps in the lasagna box.†(To Hanna, season 2, episode 18.)
18. “Tonight at 8:30. Do you know where your daughter will be? I do.†(To Byron, season 2, episode 20.)
19. “Hanna’s mommy saved her ass, who’s gonna save yours?†(To Mona, season 2, episode 21.)
20. “Where there’s smoke, there’s payback.†(To Aria, Spencer, Hanna, and Emily, season 2, episode 23.)
21. “Break up Hanna and her hottie or you go back to being a junior high nottie. Don’t test me.†(To Mona, season 2, episode 24.)
22. “Mona played with dolls. I play with body parts. Game on, bitches.†(To Aria, Spencer, Hanna, and Emily, season 3, episode 1.)
23. “DEAD GIRLS CAN’T SMILE.†(To Emily, season 3, episode 2.)
24. “SEE HOW EASY IT IS FOR ME TO GET YOUR BLOOD?†(To Hanna, season 3, episode 7.)
25. “Like babies, lies grow bigger. Then they start talking. When will YOU?†(To Aria, season 3, episode 14.)
26. “Cut Mona off? Big mistake. You’re not the only one who can slice and dice…†(To Hanna, season 3, episode 15.)
27. “THE BLONDE LEADING THE BLIND!†(To Alison, season 3, episode 17.)
28. “STEAMY WITH WREN STEAMY WITH ME.†(To Spencer, season 3, episode 20.)
29. “Cleaning up Rosewood, one mean mommy at a time. Dig we must.†(To Aria, season 4, episode 3.)
30. “This is just the first taste of my venom.†(To Aria, season 4, episode 5.)
31. “You bark, I bite. Say my name, they BOTH get the blame.†(To Hanna, season 4, episode 6.)
32. “CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOU AT OUR LITTLE BARBECUE!†(To Wilden, season 4, episode 7.)
33. “Ali, Ali, Oxen-free. Whoever finds her, gets to keep her.†(To Spencer, Emily, and Hanna, season 4, episode 14.)
34. “ACT NORMAL, BITCH.†(To Emily, season 4, episode 17.)
35. “I know you dug her grave. Now I’m digging yours.†(To Spencer, season 4, episode 22.)
36. “What will you do when the rest of me comes out of the grave?†(To Spencer, season 4, episode 23.)
37. “I’M EVERYWHERE. AND SOON YOU’LL BE NOWHERE.†(To Alison, season 4, episode 24.)
38. “The truth will bury you in a New York minute.†(To Alison, season 5, episode 2.)
39. “I buried your mom the same way I watched her bury you.†(To Alison, season 5, episode 3.)
40. “Glad to hear you singing. Last time you were all choked up.†(To Alison, season 5, episode 8.)
41. “WE’RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER.†(To Aria, Spencer, Hanna, and Emily, season 5, episode 11.)
42. “You’re already over a barrel, wanna be in one, too?†(To Alison, season 5, episode 21.)
43. “Keep calm, but watch your carry-on. There’s more blood where that came from.†(To Spencer, season 5, episode 21.)
44. “Finders keepers, losers weepers. Quelle tristesse.†(To Aria, Emily, and Spencer, season 5, episode 23.)
45. “You’re my doll, bitch!†(To Aria, season 6, episode 4.)
46. “Dear Daddy, coming home for my birthday. You should plan a party to die for. Just you.†(To Kenneth, season 6, episode 6.)
47. “I guess she is better than you. He will never put a ring on your finger.†(To Spencer, season 6, episode 14.)
48. “Give me the killer or I’ll use your eggs.†(To Emily, season 6, episode 15.)
49. “You didn’t take me seriously, so I thought I’d light a [fire emoji] under your ass.†(To Aria, Spencer, Hanna, and Emily, season 6, episode 18.)
50. “If you are lying. I shoot all of you.†(To Aria, Spencer, Hanna, and Emily, season 6, episode 20.)
And an honorable mention for creativity: