Somewhere, right now, probably perched in a hammock between two palm trees, swaying in the breeze, Rihanna is existing. Life is so unfair. The people’s pop star, with her new photography book on shelves now, has retired to a lavish location, where she will now proceed to blow our minds via social media. Just last night, she posted a video of her catwalking outside a villa. A video that says everything from “No, I’m not working on the album†to “Just because Fashion Month is over doesn’t mean I won’t take your gigs.†The post has over 10 million views, over 90,000 comments, and only half of those views are from employees of Vulture.com (a sizable fraction from yours truly). Even though it’s in slow motion, the video demands careful analysis.
The outfit? Relaxed and understated — her tattoos are the accessories. The bag? House of Fenty, of course. #IsItSponWhenYouRuntheCompany? Our wigs? Launched! Never to be seen again. Frankly, we don’t want ’em back! If her evil plan was to get us to forget about R9 (and the alleged R10), congrats, it worked!