All Hail The New Drip King: How Online Were You In June?

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Subtweets

A submersible watercraft containing a bunch of billionaires and one of their unfortunate kids (but not that one) disappeared near the Titanic, 13,000 feet below water, and the anxious, onlooking world coped the only way the internet knows how: through off-color memes, uninformed explainers, and conspiracy theories.

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Blue Up

If your Google search history for June looks like “Blue Ivy dance,� “Blue Ivy dance tutorial,� and then “Blue Ivy dance tutorial EASY� after the 11-year-old began appearing in mom Beyoncé’s Renaissance tour, just know you’re not alone.

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Tuckered out

Following his abrupt firing from Fox News, the text-friendly conservative star and new Elon Musk bud dramatically opened up shop on Twitter — which is kind of like slamming the door behind you only to realize you’re in the linen closet. (Or a cabin, as it were.)

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Boppenheimer (Or is it Barbenheimer?)

Inside you there are two wolves. On July 21, you can finally feed both of them. Barbie and Oppenheimer, two films that are as anticipated as they are disparate, both hit theaters next month. Leading up to the release date, they’ve become engaged in a marketing arms race, with Barbie appropriately pulling lavish stunts like erecting a real-life Dream House in Malibu and unleashing Ryan Gosling busses into cities and Oppenheimer brooding in the shadows. But really, they needn’t bother, because viewers have been memeing the two films into the Zeitgeist for free, riffing on their combination and laying out schedules for how they’re planning on tackling the double feature.

Why it’s a two: The anticipation of these films, both projected to rake in hundreds of millions of dollars at the box office, is as much about the ridiculousness of their combination as it is any enthusiasm for the movies themselves. Oppenheimer versus Barbie taps into our most base instincts — it’s girls versus boys, cats versus dogs, and the ultimate form of this meme.

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Subs on strike

On June 10, thousands of Reddit subs went private in protest of the company charging third-party developers for access to its data starting in July. As a casual user, this doesn’t mean much, but moderators in particular rely on third-party apps to help them do their job — a term I used loosely, since they tend to their online communities entirely for free. The initial two-day strike was effective in getting media attention, and even prompted the platform to briefly crash, but rising tensions between moderators and Reddit’s CEO, Steve Huffman, means many subs have yet to reopen. Others, like r/Pics, are taking a more fuck-you approach, reopening to public but only allowing photos of John Oliver.

At the time of writing, this standoff has not been resolved, and in fact has only become more antagonistic, with moderators accusing Reddit of unilaterally removing them from their digital posts in retaliation. We asked the moderators of popular sub-Reddits who are still on strike to share why this continued action is important:

“Moderation is already a difficult, thankless job; a role which attracts no end of hostility, exposes an individual to truly reprehensible media, and often results in real-world harassment (or worse). Volunteer moderation therefore requires an exceptional amount of dedication, given that one’s only thanks is the knowledge that their community is welcoming and enjoyable. Reddit may very well be able to find replacement moderators, but the likelihood of burnout, abandonment, and infiltration by bad actors is incredibly high.� —u/RamsesThePigeon, /r/GIFs and /r/Pics mod

“This entire protest was a labor of love. We only did what we have become accustomed to doing: preventing Reddit from doing something truly foolish. I could list many reasons why the change is misguided but will illustrate the point with r/Blind. Reddit did not realize or did not care that some users have disabilities and rely on third-party apps built on the API. Initially, they were fully intending to kill these apps and leave users on r/Blind, among others, without any means to continue using the platform. Is this incompetence, ignorance, or an honest mistake? I don’t know, but it’s one example in a long list of Reddit’s carelessness and the community filling in the gaps.� —u/ARoyaleWithCheese, r/MildlyInteresting mod

“For our music-specific sub-Reddit, we need to operate our own private servers that detect things like specific artists being reposted, or pulling information from linked YouTube channels to ensure that music isn’t being pirated or hosted on an unofficial channel when an official one is available. This is just an example of some of the tools we use that Reddit doesn’t provide, and cost volunteers money.

Volunteers should never be given an ultimatum to perform work. For a for-profit company to order volunteers to get ‘back to work’ is appalling and probably a violation of some US labor law(s) — among the ones we have left.� — r/Music

Why it’s a 2: Even if you’re not a member of any sub-Reddits, the site has likely been there for you when Google wasn’t. The sheer number of collected experiences on the platform allows for everything from troubleshooting why your iPhone has suddenly stopped playing voice notes to finding out which seasonal color palette you are. But the resource is only as helpful as the people who work to make it accessible, and with moderators fleeing, the site may never recover.

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Uke-apology

This is not what we meant when we asked for a twee revival. To even call Colleen Ballinger’s response video to allegations of inappropriate behavior with her fans an “apology� is giving it too much credit. Instead, against the advice of her team, the longtime YouTuber behind the Miranda Sings character decided to address the backlash, and against the advice of anyone ever, she did it with a ukulele. In a combative and dismissive ten-minute song titled “Toxic Gossip Train,� the 36-year-old accused the public of believing rumors over facts while failing to provide any evidence herself. Instead, the lyrics are so baffling they earned their own Genius page.

Why it’s a three: If Colleen had released a more straightforward video addressing the allegations, it’s possible this controversy would have remained secluded to the world of YouTube. But in an attempt to subvert her own PR team (“Even though my team has strongly advised me to not say what I want to say / I recently realized that they never said that I couldn’t sing what I wanna say�) she instead created a piece of internet history so bonkers it became its own news moment, covered by news outlets and, even more damning, Pop Crave.

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Shein shill

Influencer marketing may be a $20 billion industry, but it’s no match for the environmental waste, toxic chemicals, and labor violations of fast-fashion company Shein. Still, the brand tried it by inviting a handful of influencers to its factory headquarters in China earlier this year. Then, on the week of June 18, influencers regurgitated a bunch of robotic propaganda via sponsored videos that landed with a thud on Instagram and TikTok.

In the most widely critiqued video posted by creator Dani DMC, she praises the efficiency and transparency of the factory, and refers to herself as an “investigative journalist� because she spoke to a garment worker who told her to ignore all the rumors and that everything is fine. Another creator, Destene Sudduth, remarked in her video that the workers “weren’t even sweating.�

It should go without saying that a Shein-sponsored, Shein-led brand trip is not an objective look at the company’s working conditions, but this is even more disingenuous because the labor violations — which include subjecting workers to 12-14 hour days and permitting just one day off a month — are alleged to have occurred at the factories Shein contracts out to, not the ones it owns. However, when all this and more was pointed out to Dani DMC, the creator doubled down in a now-deleted video and claimed that much of the backlash was instead due to xenophobia and not, of course, the piles of evidence and detailed reports she could have easily Googled herself.

Why it’s a three: Despite the widely known nature of Shein’s questionable practices, it’s still one of the most popular brands among Gen Z. The hashtag #Sheinhaul has received over 10.9 billion views on TikTok. However, this recent effort to do reputational damage control completely backfired on Twitter and TikTok, the latter of which is reportedly planning its own Shein competitor. Like the actual cover-ups they sell, this was flimsy and fell apart fast.

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Posting through it

At least three different countries joined forces to scour the Atlantic Ocean in a four-day search for the missing Titanic submersible and the five people onboard. Brian Szasz, stepson of passenger Hamish Harding, on the other hand, was nonplussed. Szasz found comfort in the little things: tweeting thirstily at OnlyFans models, attending a Blink-182 concert, and fighting with Cardi B. His bizarre and erratic internet behavior in the midst of what should have been a life-altering tragedy became a second tier of submarine entertainment, something to tune into when the wall-to-wall coverage was on commercial break.

Why it’s a three: Please, if my online behavior ever becomes so unhinged that I land myself an Us Weekly’s “5 Things You Should Know� explainer, put me on the next submersible.

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Twitch Switch

Of all the social-media platforms, Twitch and its creators tend to stay in their own lane. But Canadian Twitch streamer xQc made it all the way to the New York Times with news he was signing a roughly $100 million deal with rival streaming platform Kick. This figure would be a huge wake-up call for Twitch had xQc not immediately started feuding with his new overlords. Twitch has been navigating blowback from creators due to changes in how they split revenue, and Kick launched as a direct competitor this year with an emphasis on its streamer-friendly policies. But xQc almost immediately earned himself a copyright violation for streaming himself watching The Dark Knight, and responded by streaming himself watching Breaking Bad two days later. Do season two of The Bear next, I gotta catch up!

Why it’s a three: A $100 million deal is on par with that of professional athletes like LeBron James, making streamers some of the most successful online content creators you’ve likely still never heard of.

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Drip King, dethroned

On April 28, scientists actually discovered the world’s first ever non-invasive lobotomy. All you have to do is simply bear witness to the sentence: “Is Baby Gronk the New Drip King?�

First spoken by TikTok creator Henry De Tolla, the words refer to 10-year-old Madden San Miguel, whose prodigious football talents earned him the nickname “Baby Gronk.� On a recent trip to Louisiana State University, San Miguel met up with gymnast Livvy Dunne, a prominent social-media figure over whom lacrosse player Caleb Hammett, who goes by the moniker the Drip King online, publicly lusts. But the poetic indecipherability of the sentence, and others like “Livvy rizzed up Baby Gronk,� catapulted De Tolla’s video away from the audience that actually knows what those words mean (for some reason) and in front of hundreds of thousands of other people, who then brought it to Twitter this month.

De Tolla says he’s aware of how ridiculous his video sounds and that it was meant to be satire.

“It’s kind of my thing at this point,� he told writer Max Read, I assume in between reading Mark Twain and Jonathan Swift.

Why it’s a three: “Is Baby Gronk the new Drip King� is by no means De Tolla’s most popular post on TikTok, but it’s had impressive longevity. While Twitter may have been late to the game, it’s responsible for solidifying the phrase as a kind of catch-all meme for whenever any other sentence doesn’t make sense, as well as inspiring parody videos and deep dives into the lore from publications like Defector. If Baby Gronk is the new Drip King … am I my own grandpa?

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Bagel backlash/Battle of the bagels

Perfecting your New York City bagel order can be a lifelong endeavor, so when someone declares on Instagram and TikTok that they’ve found the best one, you sit your ass down and listen. But @Casketpaint, who first posted about his perfect bagel back in May, did so with the caveat that he would never, ever share what it is or where it’s from.

“I am not gonna let my bagel place end up on a ‘Top 5 Places to Eat In New York’ [list] — no,� he said in a follow-up video on June 6.

But the video’s hundreds of thousands of viewers, angry at @Casketpaint for bagel-gatekeeping, had a plan. They began mass-tagging Trevor Rainbolt, a creator with millions of followers for his ability to identify any location, no matter how obscure, on Google Maps, in the comments. Hungry viewers implored Rainbolt to apply his talent, called geo-guessing, to the pursuit of @Casketpaint’s bagel. After over 40 hours of searching and some playful back-and-forth with @Casketpaint, Rainbolt successfully identified the bagel as the egg, cheese, and avocado bagel from Bagel Market (although, technically, @Casketpaint’s order added ketchup, hot sauce, and salt and pepper).

But things took a turn after Rainbolt contacted Bagel Market’s owner and asked to officially name the bagel order “The Rainbolt� so “if [@Casketpaint] ever wants his bagel again he will have to order in shame.� @Casketpaint told GQ that he began receiving racist and homophobic harassment on Instagram, and while Rainbolt shared that was never his intent, @Casketpaint had to address the backlash in a video before eventually turning off comments on his original posts.

Why it’s a four: Rainbow bagels, bagel boss, and now bagel gatekeeper — there is no food more capable of inciting fury than the humble NYC breakfast sandwich. Which is why a feud about bagels (however initially insincere) between a white creator and a Black creator was, if not immediately a bad idea, certainly became one the moment the New York Post targeted @Casketpaint in a headline.

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Fuck it, mask on

In October 2022, YouTuber Dream, real name Clay, revealed his face for the first time since he began posting on YouTube in 2014. Unfortunately for everyone who was apparently expecting someone who looks like Ryan Gosling to spend his days making Minecraft YouTube videos, Dream is just A Guy. After the initial reveal, “HE’S UGLY� trended on Twitter, and on June 9, the 23-year-old announced that he has both deleted the initial face-reveal video, and is working to remove his image elsewhere from the internet. Going forward, he says, he’ll be wearing a custom mask — both in videos and “even in public, at McDonald’s, or any place I need to go,� he wrote in the video description.

He concludes: “Thank you all from the bottom of my heart to those that supported me, even though I am ugly.�

Why it’s a four: Dream has over 31 million subscribers on YouTube and often receives double that in views on his videos. Most videos, however, are screen-record playthroughs of Minecraft.

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Gutted by Goodreads

I’m not sure who’s worse on Goodreads: the authors or the readers. If readers aren’t review-bombing titles that haven’t even been written yet, authors are taking to their large social-media platforms to call out readers who leave them anything below a five-star review. Despite author Lauren Hough receiving intense backlash in 2021 when she took to Twitter to lambast four-star reviewers of her book Leaving Isn’t the Hardest Thing, author Sarah Stusek went ahead and did the same thing on TikTok in late May.

In a now-deleted video, Stusek targeted a specific reader who awarded four stars to her forthcoming book, Three Rivers. “I had a perfect five-star average ’til this bitch came up,� she said. While Stusek later insisted it was a joke, the video was removed for violating community guidelines and she was dropped by her publisher. Viewers retaliated by review-bombing Three Rivers on Goodreads with close to 600 one-star reviews. While the reviewer in question revealed Stusek apologized to her privately, publicly she’s remained unremorseful, even bragging that the controversy sent a lot more interest her way.

Why it’s a four: This is just one needle in the giant haystack that is author TikTok/Twitter/social media in general. Stusek did not have a large following prior, nor was her novel associated with a major publisher. But the fervor of the readers and reviewers is indicative of a larger exhaustion with the dynamics of authors, social media, and Goodreads — a platform that may be more to blame than anyone else, according to the New York Times.

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Novak is back

One year ago, TikTok crowned its Cringe King. What Jake Novak thought was just going to be a video calling for Saturday Night Live to consider him as a potential cast member spiraled into a viral hate campaign fueled by the secondhand embarrassment of watching someone earnestly rap the words weekly music videos are my jam, bruh.

“I guess people just didn’t think it was that funny,� he told Vulture seven weeks later, before going back into internet hiding until June 15, 2023.

“Hey, it’s been awhile,� his latest June 15 video begins. “I have something I wanna say.� As the camera pans out, it’s revealed that Novak is not, in fact, talking to us, but working as a car-warranty salesperson (a riff on a common TikTok joke) in an office littered with discarded takeout, empty alcohol containers, a printout of said Vulture article, and other Easter eggs from his past year. Even Taylor Swift couldn’t pull off a comeback as anticipated as this.

Why it’s a four: Novak’s first video received over 8 million views and an entire discourse cycle that escalated off the app and into the real world, with people finding him at his job at Disneyland to film him and share it online. But as time progressed, the internet began reevaluating its treatment of Novak, which included death threats and comments like “if snl casts him i will join Scientology.� But by letting the internet sit in the corner and think about what it did for an entire year, Novak’s comeback was instead celebrated and full of apologies.“I’ve gotten married in between the time you left and now, and this is still the greatest day of the past year,� one person wrote.

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Normal people

There are plenty of things to clown on in this video of a guy’s “LIFE AFTER COLLEGE as a 28-year-old with a normal job.� There’s the generosity of referring to the age 28 as “after college.� There’s the knowledge that every one of these clips is bookended by him setting up the camera and then dismantling it. But for me it’s that he tees up his boring nine-to-five but then goes home to eat lunch at 11 and then clocks out at 4:30. That is not normal, that is the dream.

Why it’s a five: The video got over 6 million views on TikTok before being roasted all over Twitter, but the thing about making a video about how boring you are is that, well, it’s kinda boring.