Drake showed off the fruits of his Bras4Birkins exchange program on Instagram Wednesday. The rapper has amassed dozens of tig ol’ bitty caddies on his It’s All a Blur tour. Unlike the pop stars who have been bombarded with phones, wheels of cheese, and the cremains of dead relatives, Aubrey has been welcoming bras onto his stage with open arms. “I would just like to say before I go onto this next song, this is the first stage where I don’t have no bras, and I’m deeply disappointed,†Drake said at a show in Montreal. “But don’t start throwing shoes and phones and shit.†As the tour has gone on, the bras have come off. Congrats on the bra collection, Drake! But we have some questions for your team (who were captured on IG stories lining up the bras for the grid pic).
➽ What’s the decontamination protocol on these puppies? We’re not accusing anyone of being unhygienic, but y’all should at least be giving these the ol’ Goodwill spray-down.
âž½ Somewhat related to the decontamination question, but can you tell if these undergarments have been worn before? How many are getting flung on stage with the tags still on?
âž½ Have you thought about donating the new ones to a shelter of some kind? Underwear and socks are always in demand.
➽ What’s the most frequent color? From the pic, it looks like black or beige. But there’s also a lot of pink!
➽ Is there a most common style? Drake said something about only wanted 46G cup size, so we’re guessing there’s more underwire than bralette?
âž½ Any Savage x Fenty? That would be funny.
âž½ How many can Aubrey stack on his head, Caps for Sale-style, before they slip off?
➽ When you were arranging these on the floor of what looks like a stadium’s practice room, how much time did you spend thinking about how life came to this? What education did you get before becoming a bra organizer? Is Drake paying off your student loans?
âž½ Was this hell on your back/knees, or did you have like a dolly or something to wheel across the floor on?
âž½ Are there any you have been tempted to keep? Do you think anyone would notice if you just snuck a few La Perlas for your Girlas?
➽ Will they eventually go in the same closet as all of Drake’s future wife’s Birkins?