We’re blessed this week with two crew nights out and a guest being finicky about drink garnishes. However, the main through-line of the episode is Emma’s insecurities — much less fun. It’s 12:05 a.m. at the club, and Emma is overreacting to Danni and Diana overreacting about what seemed like innocuous questions. It’s magnified because Emma’s already insecure about work and not belonging in the group, and thankfully they’re able to let it go.
Danni hopes something will finally happen with Keith, but she tells Diana that she’ll never make the first move. Back on the boat, Danni and Keith share a lounger, and he admits he shies away because she’s coming on so strong. Danni tells us she has dated a lot of fuckboys in the past; she cites an ex-boyfriend who now lives with her former best friend, and she doesn’t speak to either of them. That reflects more on her ex-friend than ex-boyfriend, but we’ll file it under potential trust issues. Danni thinks Keith is wholesome and the opposite of this past toxicity. We love to see it! Unfortunately, she might not have the patience to wait for him. Spoiler: She doesn’t.
Davide isn’t getting much screen time, probably because he’s stuck in the engine room and doesn’t interact with everyone as much. The snippets of him so far are entertainingly chaotic. Because Glenn is still awake when they return from the night out, he invites Glenn to the Jacuzzi. Glenn: “One-hundred percent not.†Later, he almost falls naked onto Glenn while getting into his top bunk. He says in the morning it’s the bed designer’s fault and not his. It’s definitely his fault for being nude (why?!) and drunk, so I’m curious if this inability to accept blame will show up again.
The next charter is a one-nighter with primaries Tiffany Moon of The Real Housewives of Dallas season five and her husband, Daniel. Cloyce says he’s up to the challenge because he once cooked for a lesbian O.C. Real Housewife who was outspoken about the food. (I’m assuming this was Braunwyn Windham-Burke.) They’ve requested a Japanese-style dinner, and Glenn nudges them to pull out all the stops. Daisy also checks in with Cloyce ahead of the charter, reminding him to raise the bar. I’d say it’s at about knee height right now — plenty of room to grow.
When Daisy doesn’t know the weather forecast and Glenn gives Davide sailing instructions, the guests make jokes questioning the crew’s capability. This slight rudeness that keeps the crew on its toes is exactly what I want to see from guests. Tiffany’s friend Joyce remarks on the tight quarters, “I could barely get through with my Birkin.†We get it: You’re rich!
On deck, Gary’s starting to think Emma’s work ethic and drive aren’t where they need to be. While sailing, she’s tasked with pulling out the lazy sheet (a rope that can control a sail but is currently not in use), but she can’t get it to the mark. Gary has to show her that she needs to put more weight into it. She’s struggling because she hasn’t worked on this kind of sailboat with a hydraulic system. Gary goes to Glenn, warning the captain that Emma’s greener than they thought and lacking urgency. This seems unfair because (as far as we know) he hasn’t even talked to her about urgency. Glenn, bless his heart, advises Gary that she might need more instruction and to see if she improves.
Danni and Keith are assigned to accompany the guests on a beach sunset photo shoot. Danni, as usual, flirts with Keith, nudging him and muttering things under her breath to him like, “That’ll be us one day.†Keith shuts it down; he thinks she shouldn’t be flirting in front of the guests. Danni could’ve taken his comment about coming on strong as constructive criticism but has completely forgotten it. Frustrated, she likens his work belt to a chastity belt and feels as if she’s courting in the Victorian era. I say that’s partially on her if she won’t make the first move.
I’m nervous for dinner when Cloyce reveals he hasn’t studied Japanese cuisine since sophomore year of high school. Proving me wrong, he’s ready on time and his avocado, crab, and prawn rolls and tempura are really well received. One guest, Madelaine, calls out that normally the chef would present the food — is he struggling? Danni appropriately laughs this off and says he wants to make it perfect. Cloyce does make an appearance to present the miso-glazed sea-bass main course. Like the tempura, it’s not plated individually. It’s a successful dinner, though I wouldn’t call it pulling out all the stops, especially for a one-night charter. If I were the primary, I’d want five-plus courses of individual plating. I could get more than what Cloyce serves at Benihana.
The guests may not have criticism of the food, but Jerry “J Mo†is particular about his espresso martinis. Daisy double-checks that Diana makes it correctly, but he complains that it has only one bean. In response, Diana says he’s getting decaf from now on. She says she was joking, but it didn’t come across as friendly. Danni thinks Diana isn’t soft or bubbly enough for service, and this does seem like an example of that. Danni makes another espresso martini for J Mo — this time with three beans. He’s so pleased he hugs her and does a whole high-five–handshake thing. Of course, Diana doesn’t enjoy watching this. The beans are just a garnish, but the single bean is an apt metaphor for the bare minimum that Diana is putting in.
Also under par is Emma’s performance on the night shift. She prefers interacting with people and falls asleep for about an hour. We were all rooting for you! It’s difficult to keep rooting for her after this — she’s so lucky the anchor wasn’t dragging. When she switches out with Keith, she says she’s pretty sure she got the whole boat done. Keith sees that the cockpit floor is sopping wet since Emma just rinsed it in her last hour. It should be dry by morning, and he also reports to Gary that it doesn’t seem as though she’s shammying everything. Gary asks Emma what happened with rinsing the boat, and she gets defensive because she did rinse it. He instructs her to prioritize rinsing decks that the guests frequent first. I fear Emma is not long for the Parsifal III, but when she calls her sister, Lauren, for advice, Lauren reminds her it’s only six weeks. Maybe she will get through it. If she does, she’s definitely getting a Most Improved edit.
As Tiffany leaves, she says they were blown away by the crew’s professionalism and service level. She specifically shouts-out Danni for the best three-bean espresso martinis. If only this attention were enough … The tip is a very good $25,000, and Glenn is complimentary of everyone. Daisy thinks it was Cloyce’s strongest charter yet.
The crew heads out to dinner, and Diana hopes there are hot people there. I miss if there are any, because I can’t look away from Danni’s hideous skull ring. Emma’s not feeling well, so she goes for a cigarette with Daisy. Oh, the irony. Daisy advises her not to let things eat at her, and Emma knows that panicking is making it worse. She goes outside and sits down on the side of the road, which looks quite bleak. Sweating and feeling faint, Emma decides to go back to the boat. To the others, Daisy diagnoses her with heat exhaustion, kindly not mentioning the mental aspect.
At the bar, Danni just wants to dance, but Keith wants to talk. He asks why she’s being so cold with him, and she says it’s always on his terms when they get to have fun. She doesn’t like that he won’t banter with her on a cliff at sunset because of guests. Keith stands his ground; they’re here to do a job, and he doesn’t know his co-workers well enough to neglect it. Danni flippantly says she’s going to carry on with her life. Before cutting to commercial break, we get an ominous shot of the bar’s neon sign: “‘Trust me, you can dance’ —Tequila.â€
Later, Daisy compliments Keith on him, Emma, and Davide helping out the interior. Danni hates that they’re talking about work and goes to dance with Gary, which includes some weird play-fighting. She calls it the best party ever, which it clearly isn’t. I don’t see anyone else dancing at 2 a.m. on what’s probably a Tuesday. While Gary throws Danni over his shoulder, Cloyce tells Keith he’s “getting really positive vibes from Daisy.†I think he has no chance, but there is a shot of them on the boat later hugging and she’s laughing. I shudder to think of it.
In the car on the way home, Keith confesses he hasn’t had a great night, so he lies in Daisy’s lap for comfort. She strokes his hair and tells him not to be apologetic for being sensitive. Is Keith about to swoop Cloyce? Nope: In an interview, Daisy says Keith would make a great partner, but she seems uninterested because he’s too nice. Keith, you deserve better.
In the other car, Danni jokingly chokes Gary (or maybe for real? He turns pretty red), and it seems as if they might kiss. Everyone else goes to bed while the two stay up to hot-tub. They see a group jumping in the water off the dock, so Gary suggests they also jump in. This is the attention Danni has been missing. In the water, they kiss. This first kiss of the season at five episodes in is uncharacteristically late for Sailing Yacht. At least it’s a faraway shot, so we don’t have to see any sloppiness. We’re spared from further horrors since that’s the end of the episode, but I’m not looking forward to seeing it replayed — or where they go from here — next week.