comedians you should know

Nimesh Patel Wants You to Shut Up, Be Funny, and Be Nice

Photo-Illustration: Alicia Tatone; Photos courtesy of the subjects.

This week, we’re highlighting 25 talented writers and performers for Vulture’s annual list “The Comedians You Should and Will Know.†Our goal is to introduce a wider audience to the talent that has the comedy community and industry buzzing. (You can read more about our methodology at the link above.) We asked the comedians on the list to answer a series of questions about their work, performing, goals for the future, and more. Next up is Nimesh Patel.

Tell us a story from your childhood you think explains why you ended up becoming a comedian.
I graduated from NYU with a finance degree in 2008.

What unscripted or reality series do you think you’d excel at? What archetype do you think you’d be?
Cops — an innocent criminal.

What’s your proudest achievement of your comedy career so far?
Jeff Singer getting fired.

What have you learned about your own joke-writing process that you didn’t know when you started?
I learned to keep my writing secrets secret.

Tell us everything about your worst show ever. (This can involve venue, audience, other comedians on the lineup — anything!)
You can Google this. It’s very Google-able. There are Asians involved. Tucker Carlson. Breakdancers.

Let’s say we live in a “Kings of Catchphrase Comedy†alternate dimension where every single comedian is required to have a hit catchphrase. What’s yours and why?
Mine is “What would Bill Cosby do?†Because in this same alternate dimension, this would still be okay.

Nominate one comedian you don’t know personally you think is overdue for wider recognition and why you’re a fan of their work.
Michael Che because he gets me a Knicks ticket once a season.

When it comes to your comedy opinions — about material, performing, audience, trends you want to kill/revive, the industry, etc. — what hill will you die on?
Shut up, be funny, and be nice.

If you had to come onstage to just one song for the rest of your life, what song would it be and why?
In a world where this is a rule, I don’t think I’d be doing comedy — I will have long been dead. I would’ve died to the song “Once in a Lifetime†by the Talking Heads because that is what I was searching for on my phone the last time I got drunk and rode a Citi Bike.

What is the best comedy advice, and then the worst comedy advice, you’ve ever received, either when you were starting out or more recently?
Best: Write all the time. Worst: When in doubt, sing R. Kelly.

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Nimesh Patel Wants You to Shut Up, Be Funny, and Be Nice