just an idea

Heed This: The End of the ‘Era’ Era Is Nigh

Photo: Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images

In less than six months — Sunday, December 8, 2024, to be exact — the Eras Tour will end. For a pop-music fan, it’s a feeling I’d compare to how the ancient Egyptians must have felt once the pyramids of Giza were finally finished: Okay, great. So now what? Well, once Taylor Swift sinks into that stage for the final time, the first thing we need to do is think of a new word to replace the current use of eras. The human race must begin anew.

The problem with era isn’t that it’s a bad word, but any word starts to stink when it’s left in your brain for too long. Case in point? Katy Perry’s PR team opted to announce her new song this week with the following headline: “GLOBAL POP SUPERSTAR KATY PERRY LAUNCHES NEW ERA WITH ‘WOMAN’S WORLD,’ THE FIRST SINGLE FROM HER NEW ALBUM.â€

Pop culture should be the frosting on the cake of life, but we’ve been scarfing this particular brand of vanilla icing for years now. The origins of era’s use in music are murky, but we know the term was being batted around fandoms throughout the 2010s before attaching itself to Swift in 2017 thanks to her bad-girl rebrand contemporaneously known as the Reputation era. By 2022, when Swift announced her highly anticipated tour would be called the Eras Tour, she all but planted a flag in it. By doing so, she took a short word that suggests big things — a boon for anyone writing headlines or social-media posts — and made it forever Taylor-coded.

While the efficiency and popularity of era make it an obvious choice for Perry’s single announcement, it is now so permanently intertwined with the legacy of one T. Swift that its use by anyone else will only ever feel like a pale imitation. So which other short descriptors could replace all that era does for the pop-girlie lexicon? What bold vocabulary could shake me out of my Swift stupor and juice me up for a new Perry release? Here, some ideas.

Act

Example: KATY PERRY BEGINS HER NEXT ACT WITH “WOMAN’S WORLDâ€

We used to use act a lot more, as in a “second act,†but that phrase has connotations of a late-in-life comeback, which I could see celebrities not loving as a brand. But I think the word act on its own is actually a much better way to describe what we now call “erasâ€: individual sections that are part of a larger story. When the Taylor Swift musical comes to Broadway (and it will), this is what the “eras†will be divided into anyway.

Period

Example: KATY PERRY ENTERS HER “WOMAN’S WORLD†PERIOD

The fact that this sentence makes me giggle, then makes me feel bad for giggling, is all the confirmation I need that it is an extremely sophisticated thought. While period is a longer word, it makes up for the extra characters by suggesting the writer has a college degree in fine art. Picasso had a Blue Period; why can’t Katy Perry?

Phase

Example: KATY PERRY’S NEXT PHASE IS A “WOMAN’S WORLDâ€

If you’re a pop star who is really interested in forging a new path, just ditch the whole “eras†mind-set and start acknowledging that not every album has to be an epic. It could also just be a thing the artist is going through right now!

Season

Example: THE SEASON OF KATY PERRY’S NEW SINGLE, “WOMAN’S WORLD,†IS UPON YOU AS THE WIND

Season is a little longer, but I think it does a good job illustrating the kind of sea changes people look to evoke when talking about an era.

Age

Example: THE AGE OF MEN HAS ENDED. THE AGE OF KATY PERRY’S “WOMAN’S WORLD†HAS BEGUN.

Age could also mean two things: an amount of time or the artist’s actual age. It would be perfect for a birthday or “coming-of-age†release.

Epoch

Example: HARK, UNDERLINGS! A NEW KATY PERRY EPOCH BEGINS UPON THE RELEASE OF “WOMAN’S WORLD.â€

I really just want to see how everyone thinks this word is pronounced. I want it to show up on teleprompters unexpectedly so I can watch people deal with it in real time. I also want to live in a world where teenagers argue over which Katy Perry epoch reigns supreme.

Day

Example: A RED DAY DAWNS WITH KATY PERRY’S “WOMAN’S WORLD,†ERE THE SUN RISES

Day does require the use of words like dawn for full impact. But what an impact! I am immediately reminded of Bernard Hill’s (RIP) rousing speech as he prepares to lead the Rohirrim into the Battle of the Pelennor Fields, during which he screams, “DEATH!†And if I were a pop artist, this is exactly the feeling I’d want people to have when they find out my single is dropping.

Hour

Example: LO, THE HOUR OF KATY PERRY’S NEW SINGLE, “WOMAN’S WORLD,†IS NIGH! REPENT OR BE DAMNED!

We live in a busy world. Who has time for a whole era anymore? Let’s start doing hours — they’re far more manageable.

Cataclysm

Example: KATY PERRY UNLEASHES THE MERCILESS CATACLYSM OF “WOMAN’S WORLD,†WHICH WILL SWEEP ACROSS OUR DYING PLANET ON JULY 11, ENDING YOUR INSUFFERABLE CRIES FOR MERCY. HOPE YOU BROUGHT A FUCKING BOAT.

This would get me listening in a heartbeat.

Heed This: The End of the ‘Era’ Era Is Nigh