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Simon Cowell

  1. christ figures
    The Second Coming Arrives As Susan Boyle Returns to Britain’s Got TalentWhen it comes to Susan Boyle, we tend to side with Lily Allen.
    By Mark Graham
  2. quote machine
    Megan Fox’s THC-Aided Deconstruction of High School MusicalPlus: Andy Samberg reveals the casting process for the moms in the “Motherlover” digital short.
    By Emma Pearse
  3. american idol
    Adam Lambert Will Win American Idol, Claims Guy Who’s Been Wrong BeforeSimon Cowell told Oprah yesterday he thinks Lambert will win.
    By Lane Brown
  4. britain
    Britain Overrun by Virtuosic, Opera-Singing EyesoresIs Greg Pritchard the new Susan Boyle?
    By Lane Brown
  5. bargains
    Paula Abdul: Cheap!Though Simon Cowell pulls down a hilarious $36 million per season of ‘American Idol,’ Paula Abdul squeaks by on a meager salary of $2 million.
    By Lane Brown
  6. exit strategies
    Simon Cowell May Be Quitting American Idol for Real This Time, PossiblyRupert Murdoch better start preparing to empty his pocketbooks.
    By Matthew Perpetua
  7. setups
    Is Simon Cowell Actually Using His Evil Genius for Good?Or, how ‘American Idol’ could learn a thing or two from ‘Britain’s Got Talent.’
    By Matthew Perpetua
  8. quote machine
    Is Simon Cowell Starting to Prepare Us for His American Idol Exit?Plus: Eliza Dushku hates wearing clothes.
    By Emma Pearse
  9. quote machine
    Simon Cowell’s Post-Death Plans Will Be Great News to Anthony HopkinsPlus: The Jonas Brothers will never break up.
    By Emma Pearse
  10. the industry
    Hilary Duff Plays It ‘Cool’Plus, sequels on the way for ‘Wanted,’ ‘Camp Rock,’ and ‘School of Rock.’
  11. quote machine
    Simon Cowell and Ryan Seacrest Just Need to Make Out AlreadyPlus: Shane MacGowan’s immaculate reputation.
  12. quote machine
    Either McLovin’s Film Career Is Going Great, or Paul Rudd Needs to Fire His AgentPlus: Diddy!
  13. quote machine
    Ricky Gervais Would Like to Teach the World to DancePlus: Annie Lennox!
  14. overnights
    ‘American Idol’ Returns: Vulture Charts the Season PremiereAmerican Idol came back last night to see if there’s still a single decent singer left in the United States that’s not already been signed and dropped by RCA Records — and we made pie charts!
  15. quote machine
    Lies About His Castmates Are Rainn Wilson’s Strike BeardPlus: Snoop Dogg is on some rock shit.
  16. the early-evening news
    Amy Winehouse to Quit Drugs, AlcoholEllen DeGeneres, Simon Cowell, and Short Circuit 3. Wait, what?
  17. the industry
    Simon Cowell Has One IdeaPlus industry news on Jack Black, Vince Lombardi, and John Singleton.
  18. the take
    So Which TV Stars Are Really Earning Their Paychecks?Who are the biggest bargains and the biggest ripoffs among TV actors?
  19. overnights
    ‘So You Think You Can Dance’: In Which We Actually Find Ourselves Yearning for Simon Cowell
  20. quote machine
    Simon Cowell Has a Little Dog Named Seacrest
  21. news reel
    Jeffrey Ross: The Next Simon Cowell?
  22. overnights
    ‘American Idol’: You Give God a Bad Name
  23. quote machine
    Paris Hilton Gets Political. Also: Naked
  24. news reel
    ‘Jamie Kennedy, You Suck!’
  25. overnights
    A Very Special ‘American Idol’