Brett Ratner Finally Talks His Way Into the Playboy Mansion

Ratner on Hef: Director Brett Ratner will direct Playboy, a biopic of Hugh Hefner, for Universal. Brian Grazer’s Imagine will produce, and John Hoffman is writing. Ratner’s first-ever visit to the Playboy Mansion last week convinced the aging Hef that the auteur behind Rush Hour was the man to tell the story of Playboy’s part in the cultural revolutions of the sixties. We just hope Ratner remembers to put boobs in it! [Variety]

Bana Shepherds Dubai: Paramount acquires spec script Dubai by first-time screenwriter Adam Cozad, with Eric Bana attached to executive produce. Script tells story of an economist set up by Iranian operatives to destroy the U.S. economy. While some may scoff at the idea of an economics thriller, we’re glad Paramount has such a serious meZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. [Variety]

Dillon an Old Dog: Matt Dillon joins cast of Old Dogs, totally awful-sounding comedy from Wild Hogs director Walt Becker. Dillon plays ultraconservative head of summer camp who think a father (John Travolta!) and his best friend (Robin Williams!!) are — gulp — gay! [HR]

Church All About Steve: Thomas Haden Church in negotiations to star opposite Sandra Bullock in romantic comedy All About Steve, about a crossword-puzzle writer who falls for a cameraman. While some may scoff at the idea of a crossword-puzzle writer as a romantic heroine, we’re glad Fox 2000 has such a ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. [HR]

Tarzan to Close: With ticket sales sluggish, Disney announces closing of its Tarzan musical after “only� fourteen months. What qualifies as a flop for Disney would be a raging success for pretty much anyone else on Broadway. [Variety]

Os Mutantes to Tour: Brazilian tropicalia legends Os Mutantes will tour this summer for the first time in decades, including a show at Lincoln Center in July. What’s Portuguese for “freaking awesome�? [Pitchfork]

The Cure Prepare Album, Tour: Robert Smith and his compatriots in the Cure will tour North America in the fall in support of an as-yet untitled new album, including late-September show at Madison Square Garden. [Pitchfork]

Spice Girls Reunion?: Posh, Baby, Scary, Sporty, and Grumpy announce June 28 press conference, at which it is widely assumed Spice Girls will reveal reunion tour for the fall and winter. Girls reportedly are being paid $20 million each to reunite, which seems outrageous until you realize that they are geniuses whose hems you are not fit to kiss. [Billboard]