The Fug Girls Live-Blog the 2012 Oscar Red Carpet

Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images

We slogged through the SAGs. We boozed through the Globes. We devoted more thought to Janet McTeer over the last three weeks than ever before (and possibly than ever again — sorry, Janet). All in preparation for this moment: Hollywood’s prom night, the Academy Awards. And much like our actual prom, we’re completely fixated on what everyone is going to wear, and we may secretly be hoping that the people we hate look hideous.  Please strap on your bitch pants and join us as we get down to the main event and live-blog E!’s red carpet. Oh, Seacrest. We’re going to miss you when awards season is over. Maybe. (Also! Keep up with every look via the Red Carpet slideshow.)

Fug Girls Live Blog the Oscar Red Carpet

(02/26/2012)

  

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5:36	Giuliana helpfully kicks things off with so much dramatic contouring makeup that she looks like she's auditioning for a Vogue cover, and a white gown in which she kind of looks like an elaborate Grecian vase. Sunday February 26, 2012 5:36

5:37

E!'s decision to start the red carpet coverage half an hour earlier than usual appears NOT to be validated by this interview with Giuliana and the youngest girl from The Descendants. She seems to think the questions are kind of crazy, and is actually being forced to specify that she thinks Clooney will be a good father -- as if she's going to sit there and go, "Dude, are you kidding, he's a TRAIN WRECK," or, "Yes, if he stops dating children." Sunday February 26, 2012 5:37

5:43

Back live after a break, Miss Piggy and Kermit have arrived. She has a big bouffant; they cut to Penelope Ann Miller (she's in The Artist), who botches the pronunciation of Badgley Mischka, but also is basically in the same color scheme as Piggy: platinum hair, piled high, and an icy-hued gown. She also botches "Louboutin." Somebody's nervous! And who can blame her? When was the last time the Notorious P.A.M. worked the red carpet this hard? Sunday February 26, 2012 5:43

5:46

Now we get a segment with Brian Grazer, who looks, as ever, as if someone has just surprised him with an electric cattle prod. The girl doing the segment asks him why he decided he wanted to do this. "I have a huge mortgage," he does not say, but probably means. (Instead he says he wanted to "help out the Academy," which translates to, "win Best Picture again sometime.") Sunday February 26, 2012 5:46

5:48

You know, Ryan's hair has a swoop that's almost as high as Grazer's. That snuck up on us. Ben Lyons pops up now to pimp some polls... we feel a bit suckered. Don't start half an hour early when you don't have half an hour's worth of content, people. They barely have enough for the usual 6-8 p.m. slot. Sunday February 26, 2012 5:48

5:49

The Coco Rocha ad for White House Black Market just aired, and we have to say, it is VERY cool. Meanwhile, there is a rumor Vera Wang IS dressing Viola Davis, which we suspected after Davis showed up at Vera's Fashion Week show, and so now we're hoping she'll Wang it up in those orange neon bike shorts. Sunday February 26, 2012 5:49

5:52	Now that we're in a commercial break: If you enter a comment via the live blog widget itself, we'll be replying to some of them as we go, and they'll appear in the stream of the blog itself. Sunday February 26, 2012 5:52

5:54

Okay, and now we have Missi Pyle, who is repping Suzy "Amis" Cameron's Red Carpet Green Dress project, where she's wearing an eco-friendly dress that uses, among other things, cruelty-free silkworms. We had no idea you could be mean to a silkworm, but good for her. The more you know. It's a light aqua color, and she looks very pretty (we always forget that she's in The Artist, too, although we should probably have ASSUMED it, because she's in everything). Milla Jovovich is in sparkly white, and suddenly Berenice Bejo shows up with a brand new red dye job that renders her almost unrecognizable. On Oscar night. That is bold. Maybe she just doesn't want people to remember she was here, since she's probably going to lose to Octavia Spencer. We're eager to get a better look at it... Sunday February 26, 2012 5:54

5:55	Kelly Osbourne notes that when Milla Walked out in her Elie Saab, the crowd went nuts. Nothing against Milla, but perhaps that's because she's almost the only famous person there. Sunday February 26, 2012 5:55

5:56	[Comment From EvanEvan: ]  I wonder if E! made Giuliana take interviewing lessons after the Globes. Our Oscar drinking game? A shot every time Rancic asks an inappropriate question or makes an embarrassing comment. Sunday February 26, 2012 5:56 Evan

5:58	To commenter Evan: That sounds like the kind of drinking game that will have you passed out before Billy Crystal even starts singing. (We're still testing out this Replying To Comments thing, so bear with us if it reads weird. Thanks!) Sunday February 26, 2012 5:58

6:01	Milla does look really good. How is it possible that this is her first time at the Oscars? We guess Resident Evil isn't major Oscar bait. But if she keeps looking this good maybe someone will snatch her up for something bigger. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:01

6:01	[Comment From AnnaAnna: ]  Fuggirls, have you ever entertained fantasies of being stylists? Sunday February 26, 2012 6:01 Anna

6:02

To Anna: Only in the sense that we like to go shopping, and that seems to be one great avenue to do it on someone else's dime. Otherwise, it sounds like a whole lot of pressure -- and sometimes it's a lot easier to spot what doesn't work than it is to pick out what does. However, we WOULD like to volunteer ourselves as a celeb's Get A Grip friends, to let them know when their stylists are talking crazy to them. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:02

6:05	[Comment From SamSam: ]  Who do YOU ladies predict will be best dressed this evening? Sunday February 26, 2012 6:05 Sam

6:06	To Sam: Hard to say -- we really have high hopes for Michelle Williams, but she can be hit or miss. On our blog, our readers predicted Viola Davis, and she HAS had a great awards season, so we suspect she's also going to nail it. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:06

6:07	Ryan is chatting up Wolfgang Puck -- not about what he's wearing, but rather about his potpies. If only someone would WEAR a potpie. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:07

6:10

Ryan replaces Wolfie with Rose Byrne, who's in a black, one-shouldered sequined dress. It's Vivianne Westwood, and we're not sure if it actually fits her that well. Are sequins supposed to be that drape-y? In the background, Melissa McCarthy arrives in something we need to see better. To quote Tim Gunn, we have concerns. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:10

6:12	E! focuses on Lea Thompson's calves for like 20 minutes. Scroll up, E! They cut away from her immediately to talk to Ellie Kemper, who is basically adorable regardless of what she wears. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:12

6:14	Ryan nabs Berenice Bejo, who looks somewhat sickly in redder hair and a seaform green Eli Saab that feels too mature for her. If only Meryl had won that. Although Meryl may still look fantastic -- hope springs eternal, and we haven't seen her yet. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:14

6:17	[Comment From jadajada: ]  when brad and george say hello and hang out tonight, what do you imagine angelina and stacy will talk about ? Sunday February 26, 2012 6:17 jada

6:18	To Jada: I feel like Angelina just gives her THE SILENT while Stacy tries desperately to break through. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:18

6:21

Speaking of Stacy Keibler, she's in strapless gold that we assume is Marchesa, given that she wore them to the SAGs, and also was at the show this Fashion Week. Meanwhile, Ryan gets Melissa McCarthy -- with her hubby, of "Shaun White Hoodies and Denim" fame. She's in a very glam dusty rose gown that....we might wish was a different color? Sunday February 26, 2012 6:21

6:24

CHASTAIN. She looks so much better than we'd anticipated her looking. In fact, she might actually look great, in a black and gold patterned strapless number. While we try and get a better look at her, Ryan talks to Shailene Woodley, in a high-necked white Valentino that is actually also kind of great. It's super modest, but it suits her. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:24

6:27	Ryan finally gets to talk to Chastain, who's very bubbly and charming and seems cold and also nervous. She brought her grandma Marilyn as a date, and introduces her to Ryan, which is totally adorable. We might be in love with her now. (Her dress is McQueen.) Sunday February 26, 2012 6:27

6:29	We just had to pause and flap our hands in angst over the glimpse of Michelle Williams. It... is either orange, or red, and has a peplum, and... hmm. Right now our official stance is, "Hmm." Sunday February 26, 2012 6:29

6:31	[Comment From NinaNina: ]  I wish La Lopez would attend? Is she? Sorry to be off topic but the second I read Hola, lovers! it makes my day! :) Love you Fug Girls! Sunday February 26, 2012 6:31 Nina

6:31	SHE IS. She's presenting. We are giddy and hope she looks insane. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:31

6:33	Ryan gets George and Stacy, who is indeed wearing Marchesa. Part of us feels for her that George isn't pulling some strings to get her any wackadoo foreign couture -- didn't the cocktail waitress he dated wear Valentino? Maybe Stacy doesn't make a very good martini. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:33

6:35

Keibler's one-sided hair, neutral makeup, and general dress that is more boring than she is (say what you will about her, but she seems very bubbly and we've never heard anything but nice stuff about her) makes her look surprisingly like ... GIuliana. That can't have been intentional. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:35

6:35	[Comment From seineseine: ]  I'm insanely excited for Tilda/ your take on Tilda. She will be there, yes? Sunday February 26, 2012 6:35 seine

6:36	I am afraid she might not... She didn't get nominated and neither did her movie, although our personal opinion is that she should attend everything, ever. Including Kids' Choice and all those weird awards ceremonies on Spike. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:36

6:37	We've decided that Jonah Hill still has the weird Nazi-slick hair because he wants Captain Von Trapp to glare at him sternly, maybe sneak in a punch, and then sing Edelweiss. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:37

6:38	Viola Davis! Not wearing a wig! Love! Can't see the dress yet but we hope it is as awesome. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:38

6:38	[Comment From JenJen: ]  How many TVs do you guys have on? Sunday February 26, 2012 6:38 Jen

6:39	Just one! GFY HQ doesn't have a media room yet. Our sole employee, Intern George Clooney, hasn't sponsored it. We're just sure if he'd show up to work, he'd spot us about three TVs, right? Sunday February 26, 2012 6:39

6:39	[Comment From LeslieLeslie: ]  How many devices are you tweeting/blogging with? Sunday February 26, 2012 6:39 Leslie

6:40	Twenty: Nine laptops, two desktops, four iPads, two iPhones, a pager, a chisel and a stone wall, and Ryan Gosling's abs. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:40

6:41	[Comment From KimKim: ]  No comment on Shailene's ensemble? You guys had such high hopes. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:41 Kim

6:41	We noted it earlier -- we actually kind of like it, although obviously that often changes once we see the pictures. But we thought she'd go tulle or something, so based on that we're pleased. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:41

6:42	Oh VIOLA. A scrolldown if ever we did see one. Love her head, concerned about her boobs, potentially queasy once we get to the ruffly bottom. We wish she looked better since she's probably going to win and this outfit will follow her forever. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:42

6:43	[Comment From TeeveeTeevee: ]  Should I feel guilty about sitting in front of the wreckage of a BLT while awaiting Jean Dujardin's appearance? Should I have had a more dignified dinner? Sunday February 26, 2012 6:43 Teevee

6:43	There is nothing undignified about wrecking a BLT. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:43

6:46	Michelle Williams' dress... we are divided; one of us likes it, tentatively, and the other really, really wishes we could've seen it without the waist hanky. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:46

6:47

E!'s camera is spending a LOT of time on Diddy as he gets out of the limo and has his coat brushed off vigorously by a lackey with a lint brush. He must be tired -- he just got dunked over last night as part of the NBA slam-dunk contest (meaning, he stood there, threw a ball into the air, and a large dude flew over his head with no regard for his own family jewels and slammed it). Sunday February 26, 2012 6:47

6:50	Rooney Mara's dress is pretty much exactly what anyone who's ever seen her before would predict she'd wear. It's white, it's slight. Next. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:50

6:53	Oh, thank God, this absurd Dior ad is back! We still need someone to explain to us why Grace Kelly is at a fashion show DESPITE BEING DEAD. Is it being held on The Astral Plane? Sunday February 26, 2012 6:53

6:54	Michelle Williams is up. We can't help but wonder why she now seems to be speaking in a faux semi-English accent. She's in an orange-y Louis Vuitton that we are somewhat divided on. But neither one of us unabashedly loves it. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:54

6:57

Rooney Mara brought sister Kate as a date -- that's a touching poem. She's wearing a structured white Givenchy, and it does not fit, probably because she chose it this morning. She remains an incredibly terrible interview. She gives Ryan nothing, and it comes across a bit as coldness. Which means that when she takes her leave of him, he comes as close as he ever does to making a "whatever" face. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:57

6:58	Ryan chats up Diddy -- who produced one of the documentaries that's up this year, "Undefeated." We get a look at Janet McTeer, who is wearing red that seems serviceable, and whose date looks, out of the corner of our eyes, like Woody Harrelson. IF ONLY. Sunday February 26, 2012 6:58

7:00	Octavia Spencer! Her clothes always fit her impeccably. She looks good in Tadashi Shoji-- as does Glenn Close, we think, who's wearing green. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:00

7:01	[Comment From DanielleDanielle: ]  I swear we've seen this dress on Octavia Spencer before. She looks gorgeous, but super familiar Sunday February 26, 2012 7:01 Danielle

7:02	She DOES have a type. But if it's not broke, don't fix it -- especially at the Oscars, we tend to think. But you're not wrong that she's worn this look quite a bit. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:02

7:04

We really wish Jonah Hill had worn a classic tux, instead of swapping in the black shirt for the white one. Dude, how often are you going to be nominated for an Oscar? Do it up Old Hollywoods-style. That being said, Jonah Hill has become so likeable over the last several years, and he brought his mom as a date, which is always cute. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:04

7:05	[Comment From CDCD: ]  Kristen Wiig has succeeded in looking like she could be basically anybody if you just squint a little bit. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:05 CD

7:06	CD, that is bang on. We totally agree. And she's wearing beige, again. Sigh. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:06

7:07	Ryan's got Jean Desjardins. He asks him if he's going to be the first Frenchman to win Best Actor, if he does. We hope Ryan just asks him solely about stereotypical French things, like...."what do you think of brie?" and "don't you just love berets?" Sunday February 26, 2012 7:07

7:08	Sasha Baron Cohen has arrived, in full costume as The Dictator. So, in other words, The Egg of the Oscars. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:08

7:13	It must be said that Wiig's writing partner's dress is a fantastic color -- a great sort of teal blue. If only Wiig hadn't gone neutral in a very, very predictable J Mendel. The woman do seem to be giddy to be there, though, which is always refreshing. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:13

7:15	We just noticed that E! isn't letting Giuliana interview anyone. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:15

7:16	Emma Stone has arrived. She is wearing red with a giant neck bow. We need to get a better look, but it seems like it might be overwhelming on her. So far, Chastain is the best of the night. we think. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:16

7:19

On second thought, we wish Sasha Baron Cohen HAD arrived in an egg. Then we wouldn't have to sit through this promo for his movie. He just spilled faux crematory ashes all over Seacrest, and Ryan is PEEVED. Legitimately mad about it. Giuliana and Kelly think it's hilarious. Ryan...does not. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:19

7:21	[Comment From MarianMarian: ]  I haven't seen Emma Stone yet but didn't Nicole Kidman wear a red dress with a neck bow a few years ago? Sunday February 26, 2012 7:21 Marian

7:21	We JUST said the same thing. Very hopeful she'll end up talking to Ryan so we can examine it... Sunday February 26, 2012 7:21

7:21	[Comment From LoriLori: ]  You need to be watching ABC! Prince Albert and his hostage bride are being interviewed on the red carpet! Sunday February 26, 2012 7:21 Lori

7:22	NOOOOOO! [shakes fist] Sunday February 26, 2012 7:22

7:23	[Comment From daninadanina: ]  where's diddy's lint brush when you need it? Sunday February 26, 2012 7:23 danina

7:23	Love. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:23

7:24	Antonio Banderas and Melanie Griffith are here. And they're still married. Do they get enough credit for that? By Hollywood standards they're lifers. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:24

7:24	Tina Fey's dress seems to fit her better than her last few efforts -- it's a Carolina Herrera, custom, possibly... navy? Her earrings and hair are also good but Ryan shuffles her off for J.Lo. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:24

7:26

Speaking of whom: J.LO. Zuhair Murad. It's sort of the sexier version of what Berenice Bejo wore, with wacky arm cutouts. We really wish she had brought Steven Tyler. She DID bring her cleavage. The best bit was when Ryan asked her if she knew who Sacha Baron Cohen was and she said only semi-committally, "Um, Borat? Yeah..." You know Ryan wasn't expecting the fake ashes on his coat because he hasn't been switched into a clean one yet. That dry-cleaning bill will be fun. We hope SBC pays it. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:26

7:27	[Comment From SydneySydney: ]  My cousin is there (he's a producer) and he just emailed us about how E News' security people are majorly pissed. SBC's joke did not go over well. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:27 Sydney

7:28	That is awesome. Also, there goes his guest spot on "Kourtney and Khloe and Kim Kan't Kome Up With Other K Titled Shows." Sunday February 26, 2012 7:28

7:30	Emma's Giambattista Valli is... overwhelming. What a thud. Needed better makeup and some pruning. Fashion: like a hedge, but less scratchy. Sometimes. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:30

7:30	[Comment From AndreaAndrea: ]  Doesn't Ryan realize he's giving more press to SBC every time he talks about the spill? Sunday February 26, 2012 7:30 Andrea

7:31	He seems to be trying to roll with it, since it's still all over his jacket, but also it feels like Giuliana is the one who keeps bringing it up and rubbing his nose in it. We are back to feeling like she hates him. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:31

7:31	[Comment From debbidebbi: ]  Argument here in CT. My 15 year old fashionista: Kristin Wiig looks effortlessly beautiful. Me: Effortless as in she looks like she didn't even care enough to try. Discuss. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:31 debbi

7:31	Not to shout down our nation's youth, but we're with you. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:31

7:31	[Comment From BreixahBreixah: ]  Sarah Hyland's dress and Kelly Osburne's hair are the same colour... Sunday February 26, 2012 7:31 Breixah

7:33

That is true, and that is awkward. Also, this segment with Hyland and Jessica Paster is super strange -- isn't this the time when big names are out there on the carpet? Why are we killing time doing stuff they're going to rehash with Joan Rivers tomorrow with more sass? This network needs the guts to have someone say, "You know what, I hate it." Sunday February 26, 2012 7:33

7:34	[Comment From ElizabethElizabeth: ]  As someone mentioned earlier, the ABC coverage is hilarious. The woman interviewing Christopher Plummer just keeps reminding him how old he is. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:34 Elizabeth

7:34	We clearly need those extra TVs. George? Hello? We are underfunded here, love. We're not asking for the Lake Como villa. Just a Panasonic. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:34

7:36

Our friend just pointed out that she thinks they're stalling with this Paster/Hyland segment because all that ash is all over the red carpet and they need to clean it up so it doesn't muck up people's dresses. If so, quick thinking. If only they could vacuum up with the original print of "The Dictator." Sunday February 26, 2012 7:36

7:36	[Comment From Deydeal Deydeal : ]  I always imagined the Fug Girls HQ to be more like an action movie control room with a million monitors and more handsets Sunday February 26, 2012 7:36 Deydeal

7:37	That is my dream. With a person screaming, "Cut to camera three, we've got as JUMPSUIT. REPEAT. A JUMPSUIT." Sunday February 26, 2012 7:37

7:37

Apparently ABC has monopolized the red carpet coverage from 7:30 onward, which explains why E! started half an hour early. So we are switching to ABC as well. We are terribly sorry we missed the shenanigans wherein Christopher Plummer was apparently interviewed about how old he is, but we are BACK ON TRACK NOW. Sayonara, E!. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:37

7:39	[Comment From Fronie Fronie : ]  The best thing about Christopher Plummer is that he said he was just wearing a boring velvet smoking jacket -- "I own a million." Sunday February 26, 2012 7:39 Fronie

7:40	We feel anyone who was stuck on E! with us needed to see this. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:40

7:40	[Comment From Sydney Sydney : ]  yeah, where are you guys? Sprawled on a couch like the rest of us? :) Sunday February 26, 2012 7:40 Sydney

7:40	We are on horseback at the beach -- we blog like an Old Spice commercial. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:40

7:42	ABC's lighting is making Tina Fey's dress look purple, rather than navy. She just said she feared the peplum but now she loves it; we feel like it's a great way to eat a meal and then attend the Oscars without passing out. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:42

7:42	[Comment From Julie Julie : ]  What are you girls wearing? Dress up or in sweats and a tee like me? Sunday February 26, 2012 7:42 Julie

7:43	Total comfy clothes, and terrible posture to boot. Just the way it should be. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:43

7:44	[Comment From Stefanie Stefanie : ]  How many of the Oscar nominated movies did you ladies actually see? Sunday February 26, 2012 7:44 Stefanie

7:45	Between us... five: Hugo, The Artist, Moneyball, The Help, Midnight In Paris. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:45

7:46

Robin Roberts is spending a lot of time commisserating with Jean Dujardin about shaving off his mustache and turning right on red. He did rather charmingly announce that he loves our country's cinnamon rolls, and I hope that becomes our national pastry. Can we slap one on the flag? No? Sunday February 26, 2012 7:46

7:47	[Comment From panthergirl panthergirl : ]  ABC's coverage makes E! look like PBS. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:47 panthergirl

7:47	This may be true. We are a bit concerned that Nina Garcia is nervous, or that someone told her to talk at one-quarter speed. However, she looks fantastic. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:47

7:47	[Comment From Sydney Sydney : ]  Did Michelle Williams bring Busy Phillips as her date? I'm on board with that. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:47 Sydney

7:48	She brings her to everything! It's really cute. And also great PR for Busy, although we don't think that's why she's doing it, because we think she's the kind of lady who'd enjoy being on the couch eating sandwiches and drinking boxed wine. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:48

7:50	[Comment From Jean Jean : ]  Question for you girls--will you be on E! or any television shows? Sunday February 26, 2012 7:50 Jean

7:50	Nope! Pass the Ruffles. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:50

7:52	Wait, Jennifer Lopez grew up in The Bronx? Really? Has she ever mentioned that before? We're just not sure. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:52

7:53	[Comment From Jennie Jennie : ]  On abc.com you can see a video feed of the lobby bar. No sound though, so we can't hear any celeb pick up lines unfortunately Sunday February 26, 2012 7:53 Jennie

7:53	That is both marvelous and a tragedy. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:53

7:54	[Comment From Kim Kim : ]  That's what Jenny From the Block is about! Sunday February 26, 2012 7:54 Kim

7:54	It is. Sometimes live blogging and sarcasm don't mix. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:54

7:54	Back over on E!, Katerina Graham is wearing Timo Weiland, and she looks distractingly normal, so of course we can't linger because it's just not worth it if she's not sporting some major hair architecture. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:54

7:56

Penelope Cruz is in Armani Prive, which looks lavendar or periwinkle. Her hair is in a bob -- it seems to be pinned up rather than an actual cut, but it all seems a lot stuffer and more Grace Kelly than we traditionally associate with her. She's such a bombshell. Let it out while you can, lady. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:56

7:56	[Comment From Natalia Natalia : ]  Is Ryan Gosling attending? Sunday February 26, 2012 7:56 Natalia

7:57	He didn't RSVP to our invitation, which was rude of him, but it would be SO like him to show up under the balcony and start singing at us before hurling up cold Diet Cokes and some steaks. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:57

7:58	The Internet says Gwyneth Paltrow is wearing a cape. Why is ABC not on capewatch?!? Egregious! Sunday February 26, 2012 7:58

7:58	[Comment From brangeliNot brangeliNot : ]  are brangelina attending? busy with the kids? or splitting just before the ceremonie? Sunday February 26, 2012 7:58 brangeliNot

7:58	Our prediction: Swanning in at 8:20 p.m. and doing the barest wisp of an interview before taking their seats. Sunday February 26, 2012 7:58

8:00	ABC should seriously be ashamed that they monopolized red carpet coverage at this hour, and then have more people on random streams on their Web sites than on their broadcast. Terrible. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:00

8:01	Our other prediction is: ABC told the biggies not to come until around 8 PM ET so they could ensure nobody else would have them. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:01

8:01	Cameron Diaz: for once, it fits. We're not sure she has her head under control yet but the bob at least means her hair looks brushed. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:01

8:02	Our long national nightmare of Jason Segel's hair appears to be over. Thank God. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:02

8:02	[Comment From Sydney Sydney : ]  But why would the biggies care about what ABC wants? Serious q. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:02 Sydney

8:03

Not sure, but my guess would be, they would get very favorable interview questions/spots in return. Not that any of them are ever hard-hitting, but you know. "We won't ask you if you're pregnant, Angelina; we'll just let you talk about that Serbian movie you directed. So BLOW OFF E!" Etc. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:03

8:03	[Comment From Kate Kate : ]  BRADLEY COOPER MUSTACHE. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:03 Kate

8:04	Three little words that strike fear into our hearts. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:04

8:05

Gwyneth is HERE. It's Tom Ford. The cape is... sadly not as capey as we wanted it to be; we were hoping for a full-on Super Lady thing that strapped to her neck, but it really just looks like a really long coat with no sleeves. God bless her for doing that; we need SOMETHING to talk about. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:05

8:06	If Gwyneth was going to wear a cape, couldn't she have entered via air? Like with pulleys? This seems like an oversight. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:06

8:06	[Comment From teri teri : ]  I love me some Glenn Close. She's so articulate, fun and appropriate. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:06 teri

8:06	Amen. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:06

8:07	Okay, the CPAs are walking the red carpet with their briefcases of mystery. They needed to do a gag where they tripped and the cases came open and the "envelopes" blew away. That, or Gwyneth came down from the sky and stole them. Should we produce this next year? Sunday February 26, 2012 8:07

8:08	[Comment From AK AK : ]  Glenn Close has a fantastic body. Four for you, Glenn Coco. You go, Glenn Coco! Sunday February 26, 2012 8:08 AK

8:08	We are powerless against a Glenn Coco joke. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:08

8:08	[Comment From WendyD WendyD : ]  Alert: long-haired Brad Pitt alone on the red carpet. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:08 WendyD

8:10

This WOULD be a great place to announce that they broke up. "Listen, you're all here, everyone's listening, let's just get this thing out there and then hit the bar." Note: I don't think they are breaking up. I hope not. The tabloids want it so badly that I hope they never split up ever and, along with the roaches, survive the apocalypse. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:10

8:11	[Comment From LALALA LALALA : ]  Has there been any burnt orange? I WANT TO PLAY THE DRINKING GAME. my chardonnay is disturbingly full. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:11 LALALA

8:11	We could swear we saw a lady in an orange and purple gown, down by the limos, but no one has showed her since. Anyone? Sunday February 26, 2012 8:11

8:11	[Comment From Sue B Sue B : ]  She's there - I saw them together on the ABC online camera. And watched Brad bitch out a publicist. It was awesome. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:11 Sue B

8:11	Viva la Brange. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:11

8:12	We saw the back of Sandra Bullock -- reportedly in Marchesa -- and we liked what we saw: black, white, sleek ponytail. Dying to see the front. Meanwhile, Tim Gunn is with Brad Pitt. They look nice together. If Angelina ever bolts... Sunday February 26, 2012 8:12

8:13	OHHHH, but.... we are not sure about the front of Sandy's Marchesa. The top is so-so. We might accept the back and reject the front? Sunday February 26, 2012 8:13

8:14	Sandra Bullock just announced that they're having "sexy times tonight. Everything we do will be sexy." That doesn't include us, does it? Because that ship has sailed. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:14

8:16

ABC just got around to showing Angelina, and it does sort of work: It appears to be black, it accentuates her waist, it has a slit, but it also has some volume. Looks like our prediction there was right, though. They came late, they barely talked, and they headed inside, where Jolie can ignore Stacy Keibler to her heart's content. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:16

8:17	[Comment From MW MW : ]  Oh man, watching Emma Stone chug champagne at the bar on that ABC.com cam was just about the best thing ever. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:17 MW

8:17	Do you think they TOLD people they had a camera at the bar? We hope not. Greater potential for shenanigans. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:17

8:21	Portman's dress is nifty -- vintage, and polka-dotted -- but the necklace with it is a wee bit Pretty Woman. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:21

8:22	The back of Michelle Williams' dress is a beige corset, which seems unnecessary -- the dress already had enough happening; it didn't need color blocking too. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:22

8:23	[Comment From Espi Espi : ]  Diggin' the Hanks Colonel Sanders beard. Very dignified. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:23 Espi

8:23	I would like it more if he actually were handing out buckets of chicken. But he is so charming. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:23

8:24	I would love it if Grazer said, "You know what, I think we really wet the bed on this one -- I watched rehearsal and it's really just not our best work, at all." Sunday February 26, 2012 8:24

8:24	Despite our inability to remember to use the correct plural pronoun, we are BOTH still doing this. Promise. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:24

8:25	Holy cats, Chris Rock suddenly looks 24. Sunday February 26, 2012 8:25

8:25	[Comment From Connie Connie : ]  Chris Rock is legit Benjamin Button Sunday February 26, 2012 8:25 Connie

8:26	And with that, Robin Roberts is signing off the most strangely paced, lackluster pre-show. it's further proof that as much as we may poke fun at Ryan Seacrest, he's actually rather good at his job. Enjoy the Oscars, y'all, and thanks for joining us! Sunday February 26, 2012 8:26

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