Aside from some choice Instagram pictures and a grainy early-morning video recap by Chance the Rapper, most of us will never know what the final Obama White House party was like. But Chris Rock was there, and it sounds like a doozy. While stopping by the Tonight Show to promote his first stand-up tour in nearly a decade, Rock gave Jimmy Fallon the play-by-play. Rock’s various run-ins with famous guests (and hosts) included offering terrible career advice to former FLOTUS Michelle Obama, hanging out with an NBA Legend, and commiserating with Jay Z. Did a portrait of a long-dead president react to the occasion? Well, there was, presumably, a fair amount of drinking involved.