There’s a chill in the air, the Sweat Tour is still chugging along, and there are two Halloweekends this October. That’s right — Halloween 2024 falls on a Thursday, which means the weekends on either end are both primed for theme dressing. Plus, there’s the actual Halloween, which you can celebrate too. You could end up clubbing one weekend, trick-or-treating on the 31st, then attending house parties the next weekend. And nothing is scarier than a full calendar. Luckily for you, the Vulture brain trust has come up with a pop-cultural costume appropriate for every person, in every mood, for any spooky occasion. And after all the Challengers costumes worn for Gay Halloween, we’ve updated our list with a whole section for every kind of throuple imaginable. Which one is right for you?
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Pop-Culture Costumes Unafraid to Reference
If you’ve got a teeny-tiny dog …
You can be Demi Moore carrying around Pilaf everywhere she goes.
If you’ve got multiple parties to hit, and also own a teeny-tiny dog …
Make all of Glen Powell’s Hit Man disguises and carry Brisket.
If you want to be sexually confusing in a Looney Tunes way …
Go as Sabrina Carpenter in her “yoo-hoo boys!†outfit from Vogue World.
If you have a signature laugh …
Then wear JoJo Siwa’s “Karma†costume — the only trick is that you have to be willing to do the dance.
If you want to smoke …
Go as RosalÃa at Charli XCX’s birthday. (And your boyfriend can be Jeremy Allen White.)
If you’re mad they canceled The View’s Halloween episode …
Mourn your loss as Edie Falco as Carmela Soprano as a Na’vi. Yes, this one requires prosthetics.
If you want an excuse to buy a new phone case …
Then you’re Al Pacino and his Shrek phone.
If you want an excuse to not bring your baby to the party …
Then you’re Al Pacino and his 1-year-old baby that he texts (presumably from his Shrek phone).
If you already own a bowl-cut wig …
Ariana Grande as Antonio the castrato on Saturday Night Live is for you.
If you were in the Amazon with my mom when she was researching spiders right before she died …
Be Madame Web. This is easiest to pull off after she gets her powers, but, fair warning, you will be bumping into tables all night.
If you are a couple and you love each other so much to the point where it’s annoying …
Be Lucky Blue and Nara Smith in their GQ photo shoot. At least you’ll look beautiful.
If you are a couple in a codependent artistic relationship …
Nicole Scherzinger and Jamie Lloyd have their production of Sunset Boulevard on Broadway right now!
If you are in a polycule that might break up at any moment …
Need to be the Talking Heads.
If you are in a polycule that might break up at any moment, but you can’t agree on who gets to be David Byrne …
Any group of contestants from The Traitors.
If you are a gay couple …
Mario and Luigi!
… But you really like Ryan Murphy …Â
Monsters: The Lyle and Erik Menendez Story.
Not one, not two, but …
Throuple Costumes
If you want to be Challengers …
Go as Challengers.
If you don’t want to be Challengers …
Go as Passages.
If you are feeling political …
One is JD Vance, one is Mamaw, and one is a couch.
If you need to go to therapy …
Dress up as the throuple from Couples Therapy, in which the boy burns down a forest.
If you’re FFM …
Then it’s time to be Elphaba, Glinda, and Fiyero.
If you’re MMF …
Then you can Maestro, Mrs. Maestro, and a Snoopy balloon from Maestro.
If you have an addiction to French …
Then you can be the Joker: Folie à Deux ménage à trois where one is Joker, one is Harley, and one is David Zaslav.
If you like sports …
Then you can be Mr. and Mrs. Met and Grimace.
If you attended the Sweat Tour MSG …
Charli XCX, Lorde, and Addison Rae are all available.
If you have taste …
Pull out the John Mulaney, Richard Kind, and Saymo grouping.
If you love “Taste†…
Then you can be Sabrina Carpenter, Jenna Ortega, and some guy.
If you love “Taste†because you have taste …
Go as Meryl Streep, Goldie Hawn, and Bruce Willis in Death Becomes Her.