Sarah Ann Bick Didn’t Go on Love Is Blind to Make Friends

Whenever a new season of Love Is Blind airs, I watch every episode first thing in the morning in a catatonic state. I am unable to look away or think of anything else. I sit in awe, gaping at the raw vulnerability regular Americans display in front of millions of people like me who will pick apart every inch of their lives as they spend weeks deciding whether they will marry a total stranger. These contestants enter the pods knowing full well they are opening themselves up to the possibility of becoming a reality-TV villain; in the case of Love Is Blind’s sixth season, it came in the shape of bubbly, self-proclaimed patriot Sarah Ann Bick. The 30-year-old customer-support representative from Charlotte, North Carolina, fell in love with Jeramey Lutinski, who in turn fell in love with — and proposed to — another woman, Laura Dadisman. Despite the heartbreak, Bick left the pods with her reputation relatively intact. “I remember saying to the producers that my biggest fear was falling apart on television,” she tells Vulture. “That’s the most vulnerable you can be, when your heart is broken.”

But Bick’s story didn’t end there. After Lutinski and Dadisman returned to Charlotte and moved in together, Bick reentered the chat when she DM’d Lutinski on Instagram to let him know she was still around if he ever changed his mind. Lutinski then tried to lie about a late-night rendezvous with Bick spent “talking” in the parking lot of a bar, forcing Dadisman to dump him. Lutinski and Bick proceeded to declare their innocence while also flaunting their new relationship, alienating the Pod Squad and, well, America. To their castmates, Bick violated girl code in DM-ing Lutinski, an accusation made more than once at the show’s reunion, where we learned that she and Jeramey have been together for the past year. Receiving a verbal lashing from Dadisman, who was Zooming from a work trip in Barcelona, it was clear Bick had more to say about her experience discovering if love is truly blind.

Tell me about your reunion look.
In my bio, it says, “Life is short, send a DM.” It applies to everything in life, not just the message I sent to Jeramey. I reached out to this boutique in Texas and asked them, “Hey, can you send me a dress? I was on season six of Love Is Blind.” And they were like, “Sure!” As far as the glitter, my makeup artist did a great job. I was just embracing the vibes.

What was the story you wanted to tell about your relationship at the reunion?
I wanted to get across that when I joined the show, it was to meet someone I could see myself spending the rest of my life with. I fully embraced the experiment.

Within that environment, you’re doing the best you can because it’s profoundly unique and abnormal. So I followed my heart — that’s all I felt I could do in that situation. You don’t really see the connection Jeramey and I had, and I wanted to get that across. Just because I left the show after Jeramey broke up with me, my pursuit to find love wasn’t over. The experiment wasn’t over. I felt like I was still very much a part of it. I didn’t get the closure I needed. So, I sent the DM and I felt it was a very heartfelt message. I fully expected him to say, “I’m happy with my decision, thanks so much, have a good day.” And it didn’t go that way. I never expected I would be where I am now.

Despite the fact that I felt attacked and bullied throughout the entire experiment, I have no problem with any of the women on the show. You can see some of the conversations Laura and AD are having early in the season. From my perspective, I never felt like they wanted to be my friends.

Can you expand on the bullying? What happened to make you feel that way?
There were a lot of emotions going on, especially in the latter half of the experiment when people were building true connections. I love to talk; I’m very vocal. I got really excited about the connection I had with Jeramey, and I was voicing that to some of the women. And I could feel people talking about me; I could hear tidbits. I would walk up to Laura or AD or some of the other women and try to have a conversation, and I would feel pushed out. They turned their backs toward me. I could never figure out what I was doing wrong. I was kind to all of them and I wanted everyone to find someone they could potentially match.

In fact, there is a part in the reunion where I look at Jessica and I say, “You saw me bawling my eyes out when Jeramey broke up with me.” And it’s true. I walked out of that pod not knowing what to say at that moment because I felt in my heart he was going to choose me. When he broke up with me, I was at a loss for words. I walked off set, got into the car, and Jess was the only woman with me riding back to the hotel. I just broke down. I was like, “I am so hurt. I feel blindsided and gaslighted.” And she did not have a bit of empathy for me. Jess defended the connection Laura had with Jeramey and she did not feel that he did any of that. And I was like, “How are you to speak to that when you were not on any of the dates with Jeramey and me?”

Did you think there was hope to have better relationships with the women out in the real world? 
I was close with Chelsea at one point, and Brittany and I really connected on a spiritual level. I knew I wouldn’t be as close to some of the women, but it turned into a mob mentality. I got removed from the group chat and had no way to defend myself. There was no conversation with any of the women after that. They iced me out completely.

Listen, things could’ve been done differently. But given that it’s a unique situation none of us have been a part of before, you never know how you’re going to react in those circumstances. I also didn’t go for friends. I went to meet the love of my life.

Was there a point when you wanted to reach out to Laura once you and Jeramey decided you were in a relationship? 
I was fearful that what she might say would be fueled by everyone else. I was afraid the message would be sent out to the group chat I was no longer in. She took the message Jeramey got, screenshotted it, and blasted me to everyone else. I felt backed into a corner, like if I say something to her it’s not going to stay with her.

I went back and forth. I thought, Maybe I should just do this because I don’t want her to be hurt. But also, I was very real in my apology to her at the lake. I know at the reunion she didn’t feel that way, but I meant everything I said, that I wanted to give her the pedestal to unload everything she felt about me. I was trying to be an open ear for her, but she took it as me trying to gather information about my new relationship. At the time, Jeramey and I weren’t even in a relationship. I couldn’t bring myself to reach out because of the amount of shade being thrown my way.

What is your definition of a girl’s girl? That phrase was thrown out a lot, and I’m curious what it means to you.
Being a girl’s girl to me is finding my people and riding for those people and them riding back for me. My loyalty resides with those who are allowing me to be my full self and vice versa. I will always stand up for women, 100 percent. But you have to fight for what you want, you really do. You have one life to live as far as I know, and if it’s fighting for love, you should always do that. So being a girl’s girl is being unapologetically who you are and finding your people and fighting for those women and fighting for women who will stand up for you.

There are a ton of women who have reached out to me in my DMs who are maybe a little nervous to put it in a comment section because of the backlash they will get, like, “Hey, you were confident in yourself and stood up for what you believe in.” That to me is a true woman’s woman.

I think it’s a little outlandish to say that all the women in the cast were girl’s girls. By now, maybe they are, but they knew each other for an entire two weeks and were dating the same people. The goal was not to go to meet friends.

So their definition was not exactly what they were doing?
The attacking and the bullying was not very girl’s girl of them. I would’ve been floored if one of them said, “Let’s not just bash Sarah Ann the entire time.” But I think Nick and Vanessa did a great job asking the questions.

I want to go back to something you said in the pods while talking to Jeramey about your beliefs. You said, “I’m a huge patriot.” What did you mean by that?
I see the internet reacting to that and it fueled a lot of the hatred toward me, which is unfortunate. The word patriot to me means that I’m extremely grateful for the people who have served our country and died for us to have the freedom we do and have opportunities like this. I am unapologetically American, and I’m proud to live in the greatest country in the world. That’s all I meant by that. Also, for people to have a choice in what they believe and how they feel. I am standing up for that even if it’s different from what I believe!

There’s a time and place for these conversations. I have a great relationship with every single one of my friends. We have different views, but I judge them based on our friendship and them as people and our loyalty to each other.

Do you think you and Jeramey are on the same page when it comes to that?
That’s definitely a question you should ask Jeramey. We have those conversations, and we talk about that often. But I don’t want to speak for him, and I want him to be able to put that out into the world on his own.

You seem very happy now. Was it all worth it to get to this? Was Jeramey worth it in the end?
Jeramey is a great guy. People get to see such a short snippet of who we are. We are characters to a lot of people. It’s been completely worth it. I would do it again, because it was such an incredible, once-in-a lifetime opportunity. The hate stinks, some of it gets taken completely out of context and taken way too far. But I got what I came for.

This interview has been edited and condensed.

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