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Yesterday, Calvin Klein model and mediocre skateboarder Justin Bieber was photographed leaving an L.A. salon with what we can only presume was a haircut so bad that he refused to leave without 360-degree head protection. To hide his new hairdo from passersby and paparazzi, Bieber wore a royal-blue baseball cap, whose coverage he supplemented with two velvety seat-cushions pressed to either side of his skull. This innovative camouflage technique has the added benefit of blocking out most light and sound — like a portable sensory-deprivation chamber in which Justin can meditate. As for what happened inside the salon, subsequent photo evidence seems to suggest that Bieber’s sideburns are no longer blond.