
Jared Leto is in Russia and Jared Leto doesn’t feel very well. He’s surviving, though; he is surviving by trying every possible cure. He’s provided a helpful pictorial guide so that you too can resolve your very own spring cold.
First, grab a tomato! Grab a pineapple! Get some espresso and every possible pharmaceutical spray you can find. Sit in a golden throne. Try it all. Your cold is a wall and solutions are spaghetti, and your well-being will be what sticks. Remember to also eat jam by the spoonful and subtly request sympathy from any interested parties. You should be feeling better in no time at all.