Which New York Beefcake Calendar Is Right for You?

365 days of beefcake.

Sometimes it can feel like there aren’t enough three-dimensional men to go around in this city, but at least the vast, diverse array of New York man-centric calendars offers plenty of 2-D ones. Into Jewish men with a dark side? Put your 2016 appointments in the Naughty Jewish Boy calendar. A fan of man-buns, beards, and art-school poverty? Try the Babes of Bushwick calendar. Do you just want an “enlightened” man to listen to Ani DiFranco with you while discussing Elena Ferrante? The Male Feminists of New York calendar is for you. For those of us who prefer a more ungentrified calendar experience — a chance to ogle the evergreen, classic New York beefcake archetype — the three best options are probably these. Consider these the Pirelli calendar for people who truly love the city. 

FDNY Calendar of Heroes:
People who still reverently discuss that Sex and the City episode where Samantha has firehouse sex with actual New York firefighter Michael Lombardi (Mr. December for the 1999 FDNY calendar, then called Firehouse Hunks) will love this calendar (and probably went to the launch party at Hard Rock Café to get their copies signed). Bonus: You’ll get more than just abs — each month has a little fire-safety tip.

NYC Firefighter Calendar:
Not to be confused with the “official” FDNY calendar, this is a second firefighter calendar — there’s just too much to contain the beefcake in those firehouses. There are pecs in snowy Central Park, abs in Coney Island in August, biceps blocking in Times Square on New Year’s Eve. A portion of the proceeds goes to the Burn Centers of New York.

NYC Taxi Drivers Calendar:
While some lust after the men who fight fires, let’s not overlook the ones who get us home at the end of a long night. If you’ve ever spent a ride to JFK wondering what the driver might look like with an open shirt or if you have an ongoing fantasy about what happens after a cabbie returns your lost iPhone, hang this on your wall. A personal favorite: a driver in a stained white tank, holding out two slices of greasy pizza — tell me that’s not every New Yorker’s dream. A portion of the proceeds goes to University Settlement.