Remember back when love was real?
Photo: Karwai Tang/Getty Images
Quick, someone point me in the direction of the nearest electronics store so I can loot a television, because Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are getting divorced and the world is in a literal state of chaos.
None of us can handle the news that the couple who once made us uncomfortable with a mid–Jennifer Aniston–divorce photo shoot, but eventually grew into an ideal humanitarian pair, are actually over — least of all Twitter users, whose very lives are crumbling before their eyes.
Please pray for all of us.