Oh, how does Rihanna loathe thee? Let us count the ways. In a new interview with GQ, Diplo has graciously sacrificed all remaining dignity to share a story about the time Rihanna ripped him a new one. He recalled once begging her to appear on Major Lazer’s “Lean On†only for Rihanna to respond, “I don’t do house music,†with what we can only imagine were lethal levels of shade in her tone. “I face-palmed so hard on that one,†he said. (Of this same situation, Diplo also once said, “‘Lean On’ is bigger than any of her songs around the world right now. Why am I even sitting here trying to negotiate?â€, then downplayed it as a misquote, as if we’d forget that other time he accused her of copying M.I.A.) Diplo, presumably having done a double take at Rihanna’s discography and noticed quite a few house-style songs done by other house producers not named Diplo, then got desperate:
Another time I had a session with her, and Future was also invited. The Weeknd was there. Metro Boomin was there before anybody knew who he was. I was so contact high. Future played her, like, 700 songs. It was four in the morning. Finally, I was like, Yo, G, I’m leaving unless you let me play her a song. So I played her a song. And she was like, This sounds like a reggae song at an airport. [laughs] I was like, I’m gonna go kill myself.
Elsewhere in the interview, Diplo does admit “I’m not good at anything specifically†because there’s no recovering once Rihanna’s laid waste to your career.